The International and Rachel Getting Married

OK, so neither of these films are out in the theater, we got them from Netflix, but I wanted to write about them because I hate them A LOT.

I rarely write about movies I don't like. Truth be told, I rarely feel great love or great hatred for movies nowadays. [Must increase the dosage on my medication....] However, once in a while, a movie comes along that I think will be good and then I am severely disappointed.

The International

Clive Owens is one of the sexiest men around. He never smiles, and he looks like he wants to hit somebody most of the time, so why is he so damn sexy?! I don't know. It's a mystery, like calculus, only more fun than that. I find it lovely that he is the same age as me, and he is still HOT HOT HOT. [There's hope yet for the rest of us!]

I thought I was ordering a different movie. Yes, I am a total ditz at times, but I really thought I was ordering Duplicity - it looks like a totally fun movie. It has Julia Roberts, and she is usually in pretty decent movies. Not always, but usually. Clive and Julia? What fun. Seems like it already came out in the theatre and I missed it. Oh well. I can order it on Netflix, since I have now been burned.

The International, OTOH, is just not my cup of tea. It's about banking, for heavens' sake. My father was a banker. It is never interesting, even with mob money. There are some cool looking buildings. Armin Muller-Stahl is, as always, interesting, even though he's looking like death warmed over these days. Naomi Watts is usually good but she shows emotions only running from A-C.

Clive never smiles in the entire movie. Never. He doesn't even get from A-B emotionally. He spends the whole movie singing one note, lalalala I'm-extremely-angry-and-I-want-to-shoot-everyone! Never saw any normal humanity. Never saw him with his shirt off. [Which is worse? Hmmm. food for thought...] 

Finally, and I am almost hesitant to mention this, it's a complicated film. Complex. Lots of intrigue. Conspiracy. I am thinking if I made myself watch it 2 more times I would understand it. Now, not so much. Not that Evil Banks Who Rule the World isn't a valid premise, but it's not as much fun as Transformers.

[I hated the new Transformers movie, too, because it's too complicated, but it at least has snappy dialogue and lots of cool explosions.]

Rachel Getting Married

Anne Hathaway is terrific. I always enjoy her movies, even the silly Princess movies. She looks like someone it would be fun to hang out with. However, Rachel Getting Married was so awful it took me several days to finish watching it, and we fast-forwarded through some of it, and I don't mean icky sex scenes. Joseph, the guy who reviewed it on IMDB [see link] is obviously from another planet. He liked RGM. I hated it, passionately.

Kym [can't even spell it normally, ick] is a recent drug rehab attender, and gets liberated briefly to attend her sister's wedding. Most of the movie takes place in the huge Connecticut home of her father, who is played very well by Bill Irwin. I like the house. I like Bill. I hate everything else. Just want to be clear on that.

There were so many things I hated about the movie I couldn't list them all, but here are some highlights.

Kym is a Drama Queen. Everything must revolve around her and if it doesn't, she grabs the spotlight. Her speech at the rehearsal dinner made me want to stuff a sock in her mouth.

Kym got into a fight with her mother and her mother never talked to her about it afterwards. The whole family still needs therapy to deal with a traumatic past event {I won't spoil it by saying what].

Why did Rachel have everyone dress like Indian women instead of normal bridesmaid dresses??! I have seen some weird wedding getups, but the saris were just inexplicable.

Jon Demme obviously likes weddings, or parties, I don't know which. I had to fast forward through the interminable rehearsal dinner speeches, and the dancing at the wedding itself. Why does he think the audience wants to see 10 minutes of people dancing, with no dialogue?! If I don't know anyone and I'm not drinking champagne, I don't need to see all that. Unlike Joseph [the other reviewer], I didn't want to be a guest at Rachel's wedding. I wanted her to elope.

There were hints about Kym and the best man starting a relationship, but nothing came to fruition. He probably had better sense than to get involved with her. I liked him, though. I wanted to know more about him.

Here's the only other thing I liked about the movie besides Bill Irwin. It has Debra Winger in it, playing Rachel and Kym's mother. Debra, please make more movies. Just don't make movies like this one again.

Comments

[wedding packages]

Nicely said. I like your way of writing. Will certainly visit your site more often now.

winnie