Sunday, July 3, 2005
I was thinking at the end of the day yesterday that it had been a pretty good day. I had been to see Mother twice, and she was doing well. Maria took me and Alesia out to lunch for my birthday and then we went to a store that sells beads and made ourselves beaded jewelry, which was a lot of fun.
Late yesterday afternoon, Alesia’s little friend Elena came over and stayed with her so I could leave the two girls in the house and go see Mother.
Alesia and I watched one of my favorite movies on DVD – “Ladyhawke.”
Then this morning, my fragile little coping world collapsed.
The nursing home called and said Mom was throwing up and nautious and felt really bad. I went down there with Alesia and spent several hours.
Mom was nauseated and chilled all day, and refused to eat, lest she throw up again. I stayed with her all day. Fortunately, I was able to break away briefly at lunch and take Alesia to her friend Elena’s house for the afternoon.
It was a tough day. I sat next to Mom’s bed and read a book, but about 5 times an hour she wanted ice, or her pillow adjusted, or she had to use the bathroom, etc. Sometimes she just groaned.
Around 6 I was getting ancy. I had to go to the grocery store, get Alesia, check on Coco [alone most of the day], so I finally called and got the private nurse to come on duty early so I could leave. I felt bad about leaving Mom, but I had felt bad all day about not seeing Alesia. So, it’s back to the guilt I felt the whole time she was hospitalized. A giant step backward.
I am just praying this illness, whatever it is, is just temporary.
On a slightly more cheerful note, Alesia’s test scores came in the mail the other day. I got them in the mail last week. She had to take the same standardized achievement tests all the middle school kids take, which was unfair, since she just started speaking English so recently. However, Alesia didn’t do too badly. She had to make a score of 300 in the areas [Reading, English, Math, Science, Social Studies] to be rated as “meets standard.” She didn’t get any 300’s. However, she got the following:
English 268
Reading 273
Science 281
Social Studies 286
Mathematics 287
She rated “meets expectations” in two areas of social studies, Civics and something called core skills stand alone. She rated an “exceeds” in the math area of computation and estimation. So she came close to meeting the standards in 3 out of 5 areas, and she exceeded in some things – pretty good for a kid who, a year ago, spoke no English, and now speaks only rudimentary English.
I am trying to focus on the positive. It’s so difficult right now.
