The Crab Chronicles

Saturday

Saturday, December 3, 2005

The house is almost completely decorated. We have to put a few more things on the tree, find the crèche and angels, and put the garland around the banister, but then we’re done. We should finish tomorrow. Not all the ornaments survived the move, but most did. The tree looks beautiful.

We went to Discover Mills mall this morning. My friend Cissy and her children were there, and cousin Malinda. Jessica and Alesia went off on their own, and Mother and I walked around with Cissy. We got some Christmas shopping done. They have a lot of good stores there, many of them outlet-type stores. We had lunch, then came home.

I went over to my cousin Tim’s house, for his wife Maxi’s annual holiday open house and jewelry sale. I got Alesia some earrings. Maxi uses all natural stones; these were little freshwater pearls with some sort of blue stone also; don’t remember the name of it.

When I got back, we worked on the tree.

Mother found a ring in Alesia’s pants she was washing – it’s a ring belonging to Alesia’s friends Maria, who had left it over here a few weeks ago. Alesia told Mother she had returned it to Maria. Mother was really angry because she caught Alesia in a lie. This is the second lie in as many days. We need to talk about the lying. I know all kids lie, but Alesia just denies anything we confront her with, or like tonight just acts like it’s no big deal – “Oh, I forgot” is her standard phrase.

I have told her several times before I will not tolerate a liar. I dread talking to her again but it has to be done. She just doesn’t seem to understand how serious it is. In Russia, lies and bribes are so commonplace, that nobody places a premium on honesty – Americans are unique in our insistence on it. Other nationalities are different, especially Russians.

In Russia during communist times lying became commonplace because everyone had to lie to get along. There were no residential phone books because nobody wanted anyone else to know where they lived. They still don’t have phone books; lord knows why.

Tomorrow I wanted to plant bulbs, even though it's late, but the thought of doing it in the cold and rain is very unappealing...

Friday

December 2, 2005

It was a very quiet day.

Alesia showed up a the breakfast table looking unusual. I allow her to use a little eyebrown pencil, because otherwise her eyebrows are translucent. Usually she does a good job of drawing them on subtly. This morning, she looked like Groucho Marx. She was told to wash them off. I found a black drawing pencil in her bathroom and took it away. She denied using it, which was really comical and infuriating at the same time. We will have a little talk about lying, sometime this weekend. She got 3 points marked off.

Work was frustrating. I am editor of the departmental newsletter, and am trying to publish soon. Oe of my staffers didn't write her article. I had to write it for her. What's maddening is that she sits near me and I hear her talking on the phone all day on personal calls. I don't know when she works. I wish she would quit the staff.

My friend Maria came over and had dinner with us, and we played games. We had a good visit. She also helped us put the lights and garlands on our Christmas tree. Maria is tall, so that helps a lot. We will finish the decorations this weekend. She brought over Sorry, a game I hadn't played in years. It was great fun. She said she would get us one for Christmas, which Alesia will love.

I heard from the agency about the possibility of getting the ball started on the second child. There are so many to choose from, it breaks my heart. I can't really do anything for a little while because of the condo not being sold. However, the real estate agent has done a new, big campaign, running ads, and I hope that will generate some interest...

Christmas, Dec. 1!

December 1, 2005

I posted this on my Yahoo board for single moms – this is all the writing I have time for tonight –

Traditions, hmmm... no big ones yet, but we are at least preparing for Christmas.

We bought 4 stockings this year - Alesia saw them in a catalog and wanted to hang them from our mantel - so there's one for Granny, Mom, Alesia, Uncle Bruce, and Coco [hers is pretty small - she's only a 5 lb. dog]. I found really cute stockings and hangars at Target, for a fraction of the cost in the catalog.

We bought all the supplies and made a new wreath and garland for the front of the house - Michael's was having a sale, what can I say. We used the Hanukah colors of silver and blue on a green form, so we kind of incorporated both traditions, which pleases me. Now I just have to explain Hanukah, and why we don't celebrate it but our Jewish friends do...

In Sunday school last week Alesia made her own Advent wreath, of natural leaves and berries. It's very pretty. We will continue to do that every year. My Mother is really good at floral stuff.

Best of all, I bought Alesia an Advent calendar. Now, I LOVED opening the little doors on the calendar when I was a kid. Now they make them elaborate, with chocolate. We explained to Alesia about that tradition, about the countdown to Christmas. Alesia listened carefully, then completely ripped off the little door #1, and grabbed the chocolate behind it! Mother and I laughed and explained no, we leave the little doors open. We taped it back on.

Since this is a new house for us all, and only Alesia's 2nd Christmas home, we are still developing traditions. I do want to take her to church on Christmas Eve. However, I want to have a small, quiet, immediate family kind of Christmas,as usual, no great hoopla. Since we don't do big Christmases normally, this feels right. In Atlanta it's often warm enough to wear shorts and play outside on Christmas Day.. [like Miami, but no hurricanes... LOL]

We've started a daily ritual of talking at dinner, with each person sharing "One interesting thing that happened to me today was..." This helps Alesia hone her verbal skills. I highly recommend it with older kids.

Dee