The Crab Chronicles

Toenails and Sports Cars

Thursday, November 30, 2006 [SEE Photo Album for Thanksgiving additions]

It’s a grumpy day in Hot-Lanta. I meant that literally – we ran the air conditioner last night because it was so stuffy in my house. It’s pouring rain – that always puts me in a foul humor.

Alesia still has not started, and the PMS is wearing us all down. Mother said this morning she was worried because Alesia spends a lot of time in her room, and I just looked at her and said “Do not chide her about it. Let her alone. It’s a GOOD thing.”

This morning, I had to fuss at Alesia because I found something in the family room I never expected to find. Right there, on the end table next to where Alesia always sits, next to the remote control, was a huge TOENAIL. Eeeeuw! I have told her numerous times, she is not allowed to clip her nails in the family room – that is to be done in her room or the bathroom and then she is to retrieve the nails and throw them away. We do not need to keep them for forensics experts to examine, or as souvenirs. So this morning, after I flipped on the light and made her get up – this is our ritual, she must rise, get out of bed, and hug me before I leave the house in the mornings – I had to fuss at her about the Toenail Violation.

I said “Since you have violated this policy and been warned several times that it is NOT acceptable to leave your toenails lying around like that, you will be punished. I don’t know how yet, but I want you to think about it all day. I will tell you your punishment when I get home tonight.” She was, understandably, quite grumpy and not inclined to hug me. I grabbed her and hugged her anyway, picturing in my mind the hug Michael Corleone gives his lying brother Freddo just before kicking him out of the family in Godfather II. [Life Lesson reminder: I need to rent all 3 Godfather movies and show Alesia. She should know that while I speak Italian and love the food and culture, Italian men are to be avoided.]

I had a talk with Alesia’s tutor, Bronwyn, last night. We are going to stop the history lessons for now and concentrate on Language Arts, Math, and Science. I am irritated because the History part of the curriculum includes studying things like the geography and culture and indigenous animals of Argentina. One day she spent the day studying Uganda. I just don’t see the point of her wasting time on that right now, though, when the other subjects need to be covered. She barely knows anything about American history, but I can help her with that myself.

Alesia did some of the reading comprehension exercises in the 6^th grade workbook and I graded them Tuesday night. She did well, but she and I got into a big argument, because she insisted I was wrong to say a sentence must have a subject and a verb. She really doesn’t understand what a sentence is yet. I know Miss Kerivan covered that in Language Arts last year but she managed to confuse Alesia on it.

Alesia insisted a sentence like this is correct: Bring some water. I pointed out that the word “me” is implied in that sentence. I also reiterated my firmly held belief that the more one reads, the easier it is to know what a proper sentence looks like, and that one absorbs the rules of grammar and punctuation, etc. when one reads a lot. I make her read a book a week.

After some more back and forth, she finally resorted to saying “I can’t learn!” which ticked me off. I asked her if she wanted to scrub toilets for the rest of her life. Mother jumped in and said people who scrub toilets for a living don’t make any money – they live in rat-infested places with lots of other poor people. Mother started to expound on that, but I stopped her. I didn’t really want to go down that road, because Alesia spent the first 13 years of her life living in desperate, dismal conditions, so it’s not like she doesn’t understand poverty. After a little more dialogue on why it’s not good to do manual labor the rest of one’s life, I finally just said:

“Alesia, some people simply cannot learn. Their brains don’t work right. Nicki [a little girl in her dance class who has Down’s] cannot learn much at all –her brain is very limited. Neither can your cousin Robert – he can only learn on about a first grade level. It’s terribly sad. They are very limited. You, on the other hand, have a terrific brain. You have gone from reading on a 2^nd grade level last January to reading on 6^th or 7^th grade level now. That’s 5 reading levels in less than a year. Do you know how amazing that is? Not one person in 10,000 could do that, kiddo! You have an amazing brain. You have a brain like a finely-tuned high performance sports car. It’s an incredible machine that can go very fast and very far. However, the fuel it needs to run is called EDUCATION. If you don’t get a good education, that car won’t go anywhere. Without an education, that car will sit in the driveway and rust away to the point it won’t run. WITH an education, there’s no telling how far you can go. You can be a doctor, a scientist, an engineer – anything you want.”

Alesia smiled and ducked her head at my analogy, but I could tell I had gotten to her. I’ve got to build up her self-confidence and self-esteem and I am floundering.

I have been sort of proud of myself for coming up with the Sports Car Brain analogy. Bronwyn said on the phone last night that Alesia is doing really well with her tutoring. However, the Toenail Violation makes me wonder if her Sports Car Brain needs a tune-up or if it’s just typical kid behavior…

Buffet At The Beach

Monday, November 27, 2006

I am back from a very long and tiring weekend. I feel like I should spend the day sleeping. That would simply make me more tired, however.

I called and spoke to Vally, the publisher, for a few minutes this morning. She had not answered last week’s e-mail, so I called her at 7:30 a.m. when I was driving to work. She said she hasn’t seen a proof yet, so the printer is behind. At this rate we may not get the copies until late December. That news doesn’t improve my mood.

I saw a great quote this morning:

“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.”

Richard Bach

I am not a great admirer of Bach, who wrote some goopy, silly things in the 1970’s [“Jonathan Livingston Seagull” being his magnum opus], but he is right. I need to adopt that quote as my mantra. Sometimes I feel like giving up. At the age of 44, it’s a little late to be changing course in the middle of my life, but I hope I can do it. I missed my writing a lot while I was away last weekend.

We drove over to Myrtle Beach on Thursday. It’s about a 6 hour drive, but it’s broken up into hops – 2 hours to Augusta, an hour to Columbia, an hour to Florence, 2 hours to the beach.

We stopped in Columbia and had lunch with my brother. He had previously said he would come over to the beach, but then informed me last Wednesday that he had to work all weekend. So our time with him was about an hour’s visit at an IHOP – the only place we found open. It was a nice visit, but too short. I had suggested we could just eat lunch at his house, but he was horrified by the idea, and refused to do such a thing. I think he has turned it into quite a bachelor place, and not in a good way. Perhaps it’s best we don’t see it.

Alesia took a huge variety of things to see and listen to, in her red backpack. She spent most of the time, however, looking out the window, or sleeping. I think she read for a short time. Yesterday in the car she forced Mother and I to play “Name That Tune.” She hummed tunes from her piano book. Since she is still incapable to singing anywhere close to the right key, trying to guess the song was a real challenge. Fortunately we recognized the rythyms of several songs. The last selection was a stumper – really puzzled me and Mother. Finally, Alesia laughed and admitted it was a Russian folk song.

Our condo at the beach was smaller than the one where we stayed last year, and not as nice. It was a LOT cheaper, however. The view was very nice, I will admit, and we faced the ocean. The first night I could not sleep on the tiny single bed. Between the howling wind, lumpy mattress and pillow, and being cold, it was a miserable night. I was finally able to drop off to sleep, and awakened shortly thereafter by my daughter poking me and saying “Mom! Turn over on your stomach!” – the polite way of saying “You’re snoring!” On Friday and Saturday nights I slept on the pullout couch – that was far superior. I did have to hurl myself off of it because my short legs were cruelly cut by metal pieces on the bed’s side when I tried to stand up normally, but at least the concave center of the mattress was comparatively cozy.

Alesia was very puzzled when I said I was going to pull a bed out of the couch. She really didn’t believe there was a bed in there. Her eyes grew enormous as I lifted the mattress out and it flopped open. She jumped delightedly in the middle of the bed, then grimaced in pain when she tried to get off the bed.

We had Thanksgiving dinner at Ryan’s steakhouse – my uncle’s choice. I had turkey and dressing that was pretty tasty. Friday night we were all tired, so we made sandwiches in the condo. We took a cooler of food. Saturday night was soup night. My aunt and uncle and two of my cousins came over and we ate soup and bisquits, and my aunt’s wonderful pecan pie, and just talked and visited. Saturday lunch had been a gargantuan seafood buffet at a place my uncle calls a “tourist trap” but they weren’t with us, so we submitted to the trap. They had an amazing variety of food.

It seems like we spent the entire weekend in a buffet line. All our meals except for Saturday morning breakfast [at Cracker Barrel] were buffets. I enjoy buffets, but invariably I want to nap afterwards. We ate lunch Friday at K&W cafeteria. I don’t like cafeterias – I have to eat at one every day at work. I must admit, though, that K&W was very good. It was only marred by the fact that Alesia and Lana found us a large table at the smoking section, and there was a large woman with two-toned hair sitting and smoking right next to us.

Alesia and I played miniature golf on Saturday, which was fun and nostalgic for me. The Jungle Golf course, with its enormous plaster giraffes, elephants, etc., and real waterfall and blue lagoon, is an architectural wonder not to be missed. I actually made two holes in one. I beat Alesia by ten points. She had a great time until the scores were added up, and then sulked. I explained that when I was her age and naturally energetic I was a terrible mini golf player, because I didn’t have much patience. She kept whacking the ball too hard. It’s a game of short putts, not line drives down the fairway. She sulked anyway, until we got some food in her at the gargantuan seafood buffet.

Myrtle Beach has changed so much since the days when I went there as a kid. Then it was a sleepy little beach town that was nearly deserted in winter. Now they have so many shows and attractions it’s like Branson Missouri. There are huge hotels all up and down the beach. When we walked down to the beach, it was weird – like being downtown, except the ocean was on one side. There were scores of people, despite the fact it was too cold to swim. It’s like Gatlinburg, if it were by the ocean. That’s really not a good thing. Gatlinburg was once a charming, sleepy little mountain town where I grew up going to on the weekends [it was an hour from Knoxville] but the last time I went there it was a huge tourist trap. Dolly Parton is a central figure in the Vegas-ization of both towns. Her “Dixie Stampede” is a huge attraction in Myrtle Beach. Her “Dollywood” is a huge source of traffic and pollution. I refuse to visit either place.

Alesia and I both had PMS, so there was some tension in the air all weekend. I got her down to the indoor pool a couple of times so she could swim and relax, and that helped her mood. I didn’t have but a total of maybe 15 minutes to indulge in my favorite beach thing – sitting on the balcony, reading a book. I shouldn’t complain. My life is much more full and interesting now that I have a daughter.

Homonyns, Anyone?

November 21, 2006

I was taking Alesia home from her pottery class last night, and as we were riding along in the car she said, “Mom, let’s discuss homonyms.”

I wracked my brain for a moment trying to remember what a homonym is, and finally said “Sweetie, what IS a homonym?”

“It’s two words that sound alike but have different meanings, like so and sew, s-e-w.”

“Oh, OK.”

“Go ahead Mom, ask me one.”

I thought a moment. “OK, steak.”

There was a pause. “Isn’t that just a kind of meat?”

“Well, yes, but there is another kind of stake. A sharpened pointed stick you plunge into Dracula’s heart to kill him – that’s another sort of steak.”

“Oh, OK.”

She thought another moment.

“Oh, I have one! Pool!”

“Sweetie, there is no homonym for pool.”

“Yes there is! Pool, p-o-o-l, and p-u-l-l. Pool.”

“Nope, p-u-l-l is pronounced “ugh” not “oo.” So it’s not a homonym.”

“Oh, OK. What about heat?”

“What two words? Spell them.”

“You know, h-e-a-t and h-i-t.”

“Ugh, nope. H-i-t is pronounced HIT, short “I” sound, not the “ee” sound. Russians always have trouble with the short “I” since there’s nothing like that in their language.

We played along some more, and she got them all right. She is developing a fascination with words, which is terrific.

I finally said “This would be a good game to play in the car on the way to

Myrtle Beach.”

I was reminded of the famous family story of the Ultimate Car Game Victory, won by my grandmother [Wilma] in 1974. She was riding with us up to Chicago to see my aunt and uncle, and happily played along in our own personal car game, which we just called “The Game.” If it was your turn, you would think of a famous figure. You would tell the first letter of the person’s last name, for instance “C” and everyone would ask that person questions with yes or no answers until the correct person was guessed. Mam-ma said her letter was “S.” We started questioning her. “He is a famous military man,” she said. We asked question after question, riding probably a hundred miles. We finally gave up – galling to my father, who prided himself on knowing all famous military figures from American history. She finally smiled and said – “Colonel Sanders!”

I am not sure if I will be able to post much for next few days. We are leaving Thursday for

Myrtle Beach

for the long weekend, and will have Thanksgiving with my aunt and uncle and family members who live there. Should be a fun trip. I will likely have computer withdrawal.

I saw this link to the Library of Congress collection of panoramic photos, and looked on here and it’s fascinating, particularly for photography or history buffs:

http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections/panoramic_photo/

I am Not Mother of the Year

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Well, Alesia has been the Crown Princess of PMS today, so I finally gave up and just put her in front of the TV, watching a Lizzie McGuire video. It was either that or slap her.

Yesterday morning, we went to the mall. I had to buy some new pants. Of course, none of the upscale stores that cater to fat chicks had any elastic waistband pants. Has the world gone INSANE?! I discovered elastic waistbands a few years ago and now I wear nothing else but cotton pants with elastic waistbands. I don’t care if they make my butt look big. My butt IS big. When I was younger I used to obsess over stupid stuff like that. Now, I could not care less.

Besides using a movie to avoid violence, I did another dodgy mother thing yesterday. I took Alesia and her friend Elena to the movies, and I saw something different. They saw “Flushed Away,” a delightful comedy about a snooty mouse who gets flushed down the toilet. I knew if I tried to sit through it I would fall asleep – thus embarrassing my daughter to death. It’s happened before. So I saw “Stranger Than Fiction,” with Will Ferrell and Emma Thompson. I love Emma Thompson, and she was playing a writer, so I had to see it. Some of it was funny, but the ending was nonsensical. Emma looked ancient and chain-smoked throughout the film. I also was totally horrified that Will Ferrell’s love interest was an actress named Maggie Gyllenhaal, whose entire upper left arm was covered in tattoos. YUCK! Maybe somebody under 30 would go for the circus look, but Will Ferrell is in his late 30’s and played an IRS agent. Come ON! I tried not to look at her arm. Maggie is tall and her face looks a bit like my friend Maria, and I tried to focus on that…

I knew the girls’ movie ended before mine, and I had told them beforehand to just wait for me in the lobby. I looked at them both sternly and said “Do NOT talk to any strangers! Come get me if you’re scared.” Elena’s eyes got really big and she said, “My Daddy won’t let me talk to anyone, even people I know!”

We are getting ready to head to Myrtle Beach for Thanksgiving, which will either be a terrible ordeal or a lot of fun. If Alesia still has PMS and gets carsick again, it will be an ordeal. The hotel IS next to the ocean, and I can at least take long walks on the beach…

The First Copy!

November 16, 2006

I met with Vally today and approved the final draft of the book. She printed out one copy for me.Yay! The first copy! Alesia was fascinated watching Vally print it out. Vally doesn't have the equipment to do a big run, but she can print out a few.

The remaining copies should be ready to sell in a few weeks. I ordered 1,000 copies printed up. The printer is in Boston. I sure HOPE it will sell!

Vally is sponsoring a reception for several of the authors of United Writer's Press on December 12. I am going to be one of the authors. It will be at a restaurant in Tucker. Vally wrote an article for the little Tucker magazine about United Writer's Press and I am mentioned in the article.

My friend Maria also has a neighbor who's a freelance writer, and we are sending her a copy. She said she'd write an article or a review about it in advance, maybe generate some BUZZ!

Gotcha Day 2006

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I left work early today to come home and take Alesia to dinner and a movie, but unfortunately the weather was so awful - torrential rains - I decided to postpone the movie until Saturday. I called Elena's Mom and told her and she agreed. Alesia was OK about it. I brought her a balloon and she got two nice presents - earrings from Granny, a silver necklace from me. We ate pizza and watched movies.

Earlier today I sent this out to friends:

Two years ago today I was standing in a courtroom in Khabarovsk, adopting Alesia. I was terrified and excited and amazed, all at the same time. It’s truly amazing how far we have both come in the last two years. Tonight, we will celebrate by going to dinner and a movie. 

Yesterday was kind of sad. I missed my father all day – he would’ve been 76 yesterday.

Then last night I got a wonderful e-mail. You may recall that a few months ago I was looking for a home for a little 4 year old boy, Timofey, who was in a Russian orphanage. He is blind in one eye. He was fixing to be transferred to an orphanage for the disabled and would have been unavailable for adoption. I wondered if I could adopt him, and decided I couldn’t manage it, and sent out an e-mail appeal to family and friends. My cousin Steve forwarded my e-mail about Timofey to a number of his friends from church, and a family was found for Timofey. The couple, who already have two teenaged children, traveled to Russia last week, and met little Timofey and signed the papers to apply formally to adopt him. Steve’s e-mail was a forward of their trip account and photos. They are truly committed to this child – they traveled 7 hours in a van, in a snowstorm, to his orphanage! They will go back in a month or two for the court hearing. God works in wonderful ways. 

Timofey’s photo was on a website called www.untilallhavehomes.org – an amazing group of volunteers, dedicated to finding families for special needs orphans worldwide.

In a few months, I will add another child to my family. I know my family is not complete yet. I know God will give me the strength I need to complete that mission. He has sent me angels to help me – I call them friends. 

Thanks for being there for us!

“A hundred years from now, it will not matter how much is in your bank account, the sort of house you lived in, or the kind of car you drove. But the world may be better because you were important in the life of a child.”

The Non-Socializing Weekend

Sunday, November 12, 2006

It’s been a really good weekend. We haven’t done any major socializing with anyone, but it’s been productive. I had a long list of things to do, and most of them actually got done, which is amazing. I didn’t dust or clean up my room, but since my mother rarely comes upstairs I won’t get caught. Yay.

The leaves are falling in bushels, and add in pine straw and you’ve got a yard full of stuff to rake. I actually got out and raked a while today. I don’t mind raking at all. I DO mind putting the stuff in those huge lawn & leaf bags. I actually managed to somehow get pine straw in my underwear. Then I tried to shake it out, in the front yard. That looked awkward, I realized later. Alesia and I planted about 3 dozen bulbs in the front bed. She grumbled, and my back hurt when I was doing it, but it got done. I hope I’ve forgotten it when the daffodils and tulips come up next spring.

We ran out of lawn & leaf bags eventually, and thank God for that.

I stayed on the diet really well until late afternoon, then the hungries got to me and I ate one of the chocolate cupcakes Alesia and I made yesterday. They are evil and delicious. For dinner I made homemade hash browns, and we had king crab claws. Lots of work but there was lots of meat. Alesia had leftover beef stew. She doesn’t appreciate crab – good for her, I saw. Saves us money. She’s happy with McDonald’s.

I actually had time on Saturday to make cupcakes, play Clue with Alesia, and clean up the kitchen. I rarely have time for those things.

Bronwyn came today and did 3 hours of tutoring with Alesia, and I got a lot of writing done. I am suddenly much more conscious that I have to write well and sell books, because I am so far in debt now. This is a really good thing for the creative process. Some people say “Don’t write for the money.” Idiots. I write because it’s therapeutic AND if I can get a literary agent and sell some books I might conceivably pay off some bills. So debt motivates me. Good thing something does that.

I don’t smoke or drink any more, and if I am seen stuffing too much food into my face I get disapproving looks from my mother and daughter. I think that’s why I subconsciously try to keep horribly busy. It’s not healthy.

I think I will declare every other weekend a non-socializing weekend.

Beautiful Fall Saturday

November 11, 2004

I couldn't think what to title this post, hence the above...

I sent this to a friend yesterday:

A stellar day! I got the new medical form and the copy of the I-797 notarized and apostilled, and Fed-X's off to the adoption agency! Now they can complete the dossier for Kazakhstan and I can start planning the trip to bring him home. It is so exciting. I finally feel like I am going to really get him home. I am just praying nothing goes wrong.

I e-mailed Kate to see if she had gotten the draft of the manuscript, to check for errors, and she had not. Hopefully she will get it tomorrow and it will be fine, and I can go see Vally early next week and get everything finalized. I just hope I can get it back from the publishers before mid December.

I talked to the accountant today. I feel like a real grown-up now, since now that I can say "Well, my accountant advised me..." He said to incorporate myself as an S Corporation. You can do everything online now, through the secretary of state's office. There are interesting parallels in our lives. He lived in Knoxville for some years when he was growing up [so did I] and he has two adopted grandchildren. Plus, he told me I can do the incorporation stuff myself, and save paying him $500. He will end up just advising me and doing my taxes. My taxes will be complicated, much more so than usual. I feel relieved, however, knowing he will help me with everything.

There was a big discussion on my Yahoo Single Moms board about our kids finding their birth families and us adopting their siblings.

I posted this:

I sat in the office of the woman who gave me my I-797 [formerly known as the 171H] and she refused to approve me for two children, because the homestudy wasn't worded the way she liked. Susan (my social worker) had put that if my son had siblings, I would want to adopt them, the "sibling group." She said "That's an unspecific number, a "group" so I am only going to approve you for one." I was so thrilled to get the I-797 after 3 1/2 months that I didn't argue, but later I thought about it and was [and am] ticked. So please, if you want to be approved for more than 1, put a specific number - like 1 - 3 kids, or whatever. Be SPECIFIC.

Secondly, while I understand and completely agree with kids in the USA finding/knowing their biological parents, I am not so keen on this idea for Russian kids. The sad fact is that many Russian women who give up their children are mired in poverty and most are alcoholics, or become alcoholics. The rate of alcoholism in that country is staggering. My daughter's mother neglected her horribly for her first 6 years of life, and had she not been removed from there she might have died. Her birth mother was an alcoholic, was hauled off by the police in front of Alesia, and I suspect was a prostitute. She left Alesia alone at night when she was tiny. Do I want Alesia to reunite with that woman? NO. I suspect the birthmother is either dead or in jail.

A few months ago, I showed Alesia the summary of the court hearing where she was relinquished to the orphanage. She read it in Russian. Instead of being upset, she was quite happy after reading it. [She had harborred a fantasy her birthmother didn't know where she was.]

The birthmother had been given several months to clean up and get a real job and get her life straightened out. She didn't do it. Alesia read about how neighbors testified that there were strange men in and out at all hours, she was hungry and dirty and left alone, etc. I think her reaciton was RELIEF - that I have her now, and she is safe and well. She's never asked me about finding her birthmother or father.

The little boy I hope to adopt from Kazakhstan is special needs, and I think I am OK to tell y'all this. He was abandoned by his birthmother and lost his hand to frostbite. His birthfather is unknown. It's quite likely his mother was also an alcoholic. I seriously doubt he will ever want to find his birthmother.

Having said that, if either of my kids ever comes to me and says "I really want to find my birth parents" then I won't stop them. In fact, I'll help them in any way I can. I understand needing that family connection, needing to know who you look like.

Adopting from Russia or Eastern Europe usually involves stories of extreme poverty, alcoholism, etc. When you go over there you will see what I mean.

Writing 2 [mine]

November 9, 2006

I talked to Bronwyn about Alesia's writing skills, and now I feel better. She is going to help Alesia, and start slow. I am going to help her, too, when I have time. Which is like almost never...

I read the funniest article about writers - it made me laugh out loud, which is rare:  http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15609623/

I met with a real estate agent last night and she is going to sell the condo for me. I liked her a lot. She isn't charging me a ridiculous commission. She wore running shoes to the interview. She had a bluetooth AND a crackberry. Most importantly, she has 8 kids, and two are adopted. I feel a kinship with other adopted parents that's hard to explain - sort of like soldiers in the same company, I think. Anyway, she still has 3 or 4 kids to put through college so I think she will be aggressive about selling the condo. She's going tomorrow to take photos. I hope Lesligh can get it clean in time.

I told her I hate that Lesleigh isn't buying the condo, but I have to get out from under it. I just can't keep carrying the burden. The tutors alone are costing me a fortune.

I had to tease Alesia last night. We watched a Jennifer Lopez movie on TV, since we don't have a Netflix movie. I bought these DVD's about Russian and American history to watch when we're out of movies. Funny thing is, after about an hour of Russian history, Alesia will insist she's tired and she has to go to bed. Last night, however, she wanted to stay up. I did the most logical thing. I threatened to put on the Russian history DVD and make her watch it. I reminded her "You KNOW that history DVD makes you sleepy! Don't make me use it!"

Kate is proofreading the manuscript to make sure there are no translation errors and the texts are lined up correctly, and hopefully by next week we can finish up all the publishing details and get the manuscript to the printer.

I went to the doctor this morning and got her to re-do the Kazakhstan medical form for me. The silly things expire in 3 months, so this is her third time filling it out. She’s a good sport about it. I practice my Russian when I’m with her – but it’s a lopsided conversation, with me saying things like “Don’t touch that! / Brush your teeth!  /  Be careful!” and other motherly things, and her smiling. I explained I just want to order him around, not carry on a big conversation. LOL.

Writing

Tuesday, November 7, 2006

I was feeling so good about Alesia completing Lindamood Bell, and then yesterday the bottom fell out. I sent this to her main tutor, Bronwyn, about Gabriella, the new tutor:

I talked to Gabriella last night. She had given Alesia a project assignment out of the program, to write a paper called Safari to Kenya. Alesia understood the assignment and did OK on that. However, she looked up Kenya

in the Encyclopedia and wrote about it, too. She just plagiarized whole paragraphs from the Encyclopedia!

I confronted her about it in the car after pottery. I asked her first off "What does it mean when you copy someone else's work?" and she said "Plagiarism." Mother thought she didn't understand that, even though I explained that I've talked to Alesia about plagiarism. Mother really didn't think she understood. Well, she did.

So we had quite a discussion in the car. I explained to Alesia that plagiarism is stealing. When we got home, I printed out an article on it from the web and told her to read it. I told Mother I don't like Alesia using the encyclopedia anyway, since it's 30 years old. We're going to have to figure out a way Alesia can do research on the computer, with someone watching her. She has no clue how to research and write a paper. I think we need to go slow, however. She doesn't even write proper sentences most of the time.

I told Gabriella to just not give her anything like that for a while. I am going to work with Alesia on her writing skills. I told her the more she reads, the easier it will be to write.

I gave Alesia an assignment to read a book for me this week [From the Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil Frankweiler] and report to me on it on Saturday. She will have to look up some of the words. She's not reading enough.

Gabriella is starting to understand what we face with Alesia. She was shocked at how little Alesia knows, and her level of unsophistication. I told her about Alesia not understanding that we have the same moon as Russia, how that was a wake-up call for me last year.

So, as Mother says, one step forward, two steps back.