The Crab Chronicles

Prayer Request

We've had a quiet day. Other than going to Kroger, we haven't been too active.

Michael went to his first sleepover last night. When I picked him up this morning I could tell he was exhausted. He said he had fun, however, and I was glad to hear that. He only got a few hours' sleep, so this afternoon we made him take a nap. He slept for almost 2 hours.

I didn't sleep well last night so I crashed for a little while, too.

I had a little mother-daughter bonding time late this afternoon. Alesia came in my room while Mother and Michael napped, and we watched YouTube videos of Dana Carvey doing standup. He has a new HBO special called Squatting Monkeys tell no Lies, and excerpts are on YouTube. His standup is brilliant. Alesia laughed at things she had no cultural reference point for - for instance, his imitation of Neil Young - which just proves he is hysterically funny to anyone.

A lady on my Yahoo group for parents of kids with limb differences sent me this link to an article about a woman who is a flight instructor and potter, and has only one arm. Amazine and inspirational.

I let the kids stay up a little later than usual tonight, and when I tried to get Michael to brush his teeth before bed a little while ago, he fought me tooth and nail. I always insist on brushing teeth before bed. Mike had 6 cavities in his mouth in Kazakhstan, so we've been thru dental hell. I insisted he brush, he refused. I told him he would have to go to bed right after supper every night for a week if he didn't brush his teeth. He told me I couldn't make him do that, and still refused to brush his teeth. He sat on the stool in the bathroom, determined to refuse to do what I told him to do. I yelled. I pushed the toothbrush at him. He cried. I cried. It was horrible. Absolutely awful. He wasn't raging, he just refused to obey. I finally just put him to bed.

Alesia on her worst day never gave me this much trouble. All I know to do is pray, and hope the therapist can help us. 

Additionally, if you pray, please pray for us. I love that little boy more than anything on this earth, but I am totally flustered right now...

Exploring the Avant Garde

Somebody sent me a link the other day to a fascinating website and I have been intrigued with it ever since. It lets you send in photos and they make age regression or progressions on the computer. Several folks on there sent in photos of family members who have passed away, and they progressed the shots to show how the person would have looked later in life. There are also folks who can send in photos of kids like mine, and they can alter the images so they appear younger. After pondering it for a few days, I went ahead and send in photos of my children, so I can see what computer magic can do. I have no baby photos of my kids whatsoever. The youngest one of Alesia, she is about 10. I have one of Mike at about age 8, when he first went in the orphanage. Below is the shot I sent in of Alesia, age 12. This was taken by Danny Griffin, who was visiting the orphanage and delivered Alesia a letter and gift from me, the little silver cross she is wearing. The photo of Michael was his school photo from last year.

I am cynical enough that I am bracing myself to see photos that look unrealistic. Some of the shots on the website are unrealistic. For the rest of their lives, however, there are going to be occasions when they might like to have a photo of themselves as babies, and this is the best I can do.

Alesia had a babysitting job this morning for some neighbors down the street. I said to Alesia when Jenean called the other day, just casually, "Hey, you'll get to make a little money this weekend." Alesia, looking slightly annoyed, replied, "No, what's important is I get to see Mia!" She adores the little girl. Mia was adopted from China and came home not long after Mike came home.

While Alesia was sitting, I picked some zinnias and marigolds from the back, and carefully wrapped the stems in wet paper towels and put them in a small plastic bag with some water. I then told Michael I needed to run an errand, and take the flowers to a friend. Off we went. When we got to the therapists' office, we waited. She doesn't have a receptionist or staff, and the office is very casual, with no big signs. Mike was a little curious as to why we were there, but didn't say a thing.

The therapist, who is very warm and motherly, chatted with us for a few minutes, and then revealed who she was. Michael handled it well. He didn't bolt, or get upset. I think deep down he may have been relieved. She talked to him about not letting other people's opinions upset him, because he is just different, not worse or better than anyone else. I told her he has been under a lot of stress. I won't go into everything discussed, but it went very well. He got to play Nintendo games for a few minutes at the end. She said she is going to start off with play therapy, to observe and learn more about him. I am praying this will be a positive thing, and she can help him cope with his stress.

Michael went to his first sleep over birthday party tonight, at the home of his buddy Clay. He was nervous. I packed his jammies and an extra outfit in my good black backpack, and we took his sleeping bag and pillow. When we got there, I saw about 6 boys, all Mike's age, and they were running around and having fun. I told him beforehand that if he wasn't happy, he could tell Clay's Mom he has a tummyache and call me and I would come and get him. My parents used to always tell me that, and I think it's a good thing to do, to give a child a safety net in case they are really anxious. 

After we dropped Mike off, Alesia and I went to Old Navy. She had a gift card, and I needed to get Michael some shirts. I found him 4 long-sleeved shirts, and got Alesia a hoodie. With her gift card, she bought grey sweatpants - cute ones, that look really nothing like the sweatpants I grew up wearing. Now that sort of uber athletic clothing [really casual wear] is chic.

Alesia spent the evening at the home of my friends Melissa and Andrew, with Elena and their girls. The theme of the party was a Russian disco, so the girls danced, had snacks, etc. A very innocent little party. They had a wonderful time. They got to speak Russian all evening. On the way home in the car they were singing Russian pop songs.

I let Alesia and Elena borrow my camera yesterday, and they took a slew of photos, on and around the trampoline. The one above came out cute, I think. Many shots of them didn't come out too well. Many, like the shots of their painted toenails or closeups of their eyeballs, I won't publish here. I told Alesia in the car her photos were quite avant garde, and she got suspicious and mad at me. I laughingly said avant garde just means really weird, and she didn't like that, but there was no big blowup. I thought I was being funny.

I miss Michael terribly. I imagine he will be one sleepy dude when I pick him up tomorrow.

Friday Turmoil

Lots of turmoil, but it was all late in the day.

 

Michael took his MP3 player to school [big rule infraction there – mine and the school’s] and loaned it to some little girl in his math class. She never gave it back to him. I have a feeling it has been confiscated, but I’m not sure. Mother said Michael sat at the kitchen table after school and cried buckets of tears over it.

 

He also failed to tell me he was supposed to be writing a daily journal every day this past week. His teacher sent me an email. I told her he would have it completed by Monday. I discussed it with Michael and he had no explanation as to why he didn’t do it. I think he was intimidated. Writing is still so hard for him. Because he didn’t complete that assignment, he lost all TV privileges all weekend. Some of the tears were over that, too, I am sure.

 

Michael’s ESL teacher called me and we had a good chat. She said Michael is entitled to ESL services, and we can request that his regular assignments be modified. I sent an email asking for that, that he be given extra time.

 

Michael did get a nice surprise this afternoon. Brian called and said He had something to give Michael. It was actually Darryl’s. It’s a ceramic dachshund with a place to put your wallet and your change. That cheered Michael up considerably.

 

I took Mike home about 7 and told him to run inside and get Alesia and Elena because I needed to take Elena home. The girls came out and got in the car. I had snatched a few moments to read a magazine. Michael rode along. When we got home, Mother was very upset. The kids had run out the door without saying a word to her. The front door and back door were unlocked. She was right to be upset. A woman who lives within a mile or two of us got robbed at gunpoint the other night, by a man lurking around her house. Unlocked doors are foolish.

 

Alesia should have locked the doors and taken Elena in to say goodbye to Mother. So Alesia lost all TV privileges all weekend. There isn’t usually a lot of TV watching anyway, but there is some, cartoons at least.

 

Michael has to finish his writing assignment and study for his spelling test. I don’t know when we’ll have time except Sunday afternoon..

A Rose By Any Other Name...

Michael went to “Donuts With Dad” this morning at school. My friend Brian stood in as “Dad” – uncles, granddaddies, etc. are allowed as stand-ins for Dad, which is good. Brian got to eat a Krispy Kreme donut and drink warm orange juice. Michael showed him his classroom, albeit reluctantly, Brian later told me. I think at 12, Michael is getting a bit too old for such things, but that realization didn’t hit me until I was talking to Brian later and he reported Michael was pretty blase about the whole experience. Last year he had been excited to show Brian his class. How quickly he has matured in a year!

 

This afternoon, I had the big meeting with Michael’s teacher and the principal. I took Mother along as reinforcement. As I had feared, they said he was struggling academically. We reiterated that we feel he is stressed out, but he can handle 5^th grade work. The principal said she feared he wouldn’t do well on the CRCT at the end of the year. I know they push the kids to pass that idiotic test. I just said “If he doesn’t pass, he can go to the summer school cram course. If he fails it then, he will have to repeat 5^th grade. So be it. I am not going to stress him out over that test.” We had a few more words about that, verbal swords drawn, but no blood was shed, so to speak. I was determined not to let her rattle me, and she’s a tough little lady.

 

The teacher, who I have been really steamed at the past few days, surprised me. She is a soft-spoken little Asian lady. I do not think she is the dragon lady Michael has indicated. There are issues, but I feel now they are simply communication related. Mother and I reiterated that she may THINK Michael understands verbal directions, and he may say he understands, but the only way to be sure of it is to check his agenda, and/or call me.

 

She said Michael’s behavior has lately been a problem. He hasn’t been paying attention in class, and he’s been defiant. I was not surprised she said that. Today he had a swordfight with a yardstick and she had to holler at him. When I confronted Michael about this later, he didn’t protest much at all, which tells me it’s true. I had to run to the post office late this afternoon after the meeting, and I had lectured him about his behavior on the way there. He sat in the car glowering while Alesia and I went in. I told him just before bed tonight that I made it clear to the teacher that if he misbehaves, I want to hear about it, and I will punish him. Any reports of behavior issues and he will be fined $5. He was ticked about that, but I meant it.

 

I also told her if he starts hanging out with bad kids to let me know. I told Michael later “You are known by the company you keep,” and I explained that aphorism. She said she had just had a parent tell her it’s none of her business who her son socializes with – idiotic woman. Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas, I believe.

 

Michael stayed with Brian while Mother and I went to the school meeting. When we picked him up, he clearly had had a wonderful time. Brian taught him how to make s’mores on the gas range, helped him with homework, and Mike got to play with the dogs. Michael was one happy camper. He said “I would like to go to Brian’s every day after school!” We are so fortunate to have Brian and his partner as friends.

 

Brian gave me a cutting of a Confederate Rose . I did some research, and it’s a fascinating plant. It appears to grow well in the south but not in cold climates. It’s also not a rose, but a hibiscus, and it’s actually not confederate, but from China. Oh well. Brian says the blossoms are gorgeous, and they change from pink to white. I am busily pondering where to put this in our yard.

 

When we got home from running errands this afternoon, I discovered Michael has a social studies test tomorrow, and a writing assignment due. We then spent a couple of hours on that homework. He had completely forgotten about it! Yet another reason the teacher needs to check his agenda. I am hoping he can use his fairly good short-term memory to do decently on the test. He seemed to recall things pretty well.

 

He wrote the sweetest little essay about me for a writing assignment. Here it is, spelling corrected:

 

Person I Admire the most

 

The person I admire the most is my mom. She is chubby, well-dressed and has a smiling face.

She does not like to sit outside in the heat but she does sit outside and watch every tennis game and soccer game I had.

Another reason I admire her the most is she is generous with money and she has a heart of gold.

 

After dinner he had another writing assignment, entitled Why Recess is Important for Kids. That was an easy one to help him write!

 

I know some of Mike’s issues lately are puberty-related and/or adoption related. I so hope the therapist can help him.

A Call from Afar

It was a crazy busy day at work. I didn't have time to post. I will probably be posting at bedtime for a while, if not permanently. Lunch hours are getting stacked up. I sent the email below to my brother:

We are finally starting to feel some autumn in the air – temps the rest of the week will be in the upper 70’s, which is nice. Do they have autumn in Iraq?! There are no hardwood trees to drop their leaves, I bet?

I started up your truck the other day and ran it a few minutes. It sounded fine. There was a little water in the bed but nothing to get upset about.

If you ever have time and want to get in some typing practice, I wish you’d write up something about your travels to Quatar – since going and returning was an adventure. I know Mike would treasure it. We are saving all your emails for him, too.

I am meeting tomorrow with Michael's teacher and the principal. I hope we can get Michael's school issues resolved. I am stressed about it.

I finally got the slow cooker oatmeal to come out right. This morning it was the perfect consistency. I added a little brown sugar and butter to the whole batch before giving some to Michael, and then he added MORE sugar! I am going to have to limit it.

Michael is anxious for Halloween to be here NOW. He is already thinking about his costume. The little ninja costume someone gave me last year will not work. I am thinking pirate, since we have some pirate toys already, and it’s a cheap costume to construct. Ghost would be even better but I doubt he will go for it. [I always wanted to be a ghost because I figured a plain white sheet would be cooler! Halloween down south is usually a hot evening.]

I got a call from a friend of mine last night named Pasha, a young man who got to know me when I sang in the choir in Khabarovsk. He was in college then, and he liked hanging out with us because he could practice his English. He’s an incredibly smart young man and he has a good heart. He came over and helped me with translating on all my adoption trips to see Alesia. He was so moved he started working with a volunteer organization and teaching computer skills to the kids in the orphanage. Now he works as a petroleum engineer up on Sakhalin Island, which is way up north, near the Kamchatka Peninsula. Lots of oil companies up there. He doesn’t have a computer, and I was thinking, how lucky we are to live in the USA, where most public libraries have computers you can use for free.

[I wish Pasha could come visit us. I think of him as a little brother.]

Michael’s wallet turned up. It was on the chest of drawers right next to his bed! I saw it. Great rejoicing on his part, and mine. I told him from now on it goes in his top dresser drawer, and he must be more careful. He also found his MP3 player he thought was lost – in a box under his bed.

 

Michael was asked to a sleepover birthday party at the home of his tennis buddy, Clay, who lives within walking distance. He asked me tonight if I could go with him. “Sweetie, none of the other little boys will have their moms there. No.” He didn’t make a big deal out of it, fortunately.

Etc. [not everything is for posting.]

This is a photo of Pasha with Alesia, when he was with me visiting her orphanage. He is a really big guy, as you can see. Alesia here is about 5'0 and 80 lbs. 

The photo on the bottom is Alesia's Going Away dinner the night before we left Khabarovsk. You can see Pasha on the far right. Alesia is between Olga, her tutor, and Svitlana, the missionary who helped me write to Alesia. Across the table are my friend Kate's Aunt Toma and her friend Larissa. All had helped me with Alesia's adoption, and had become friends. The entire going away dinner for all those people, a multi-course meal which was quite good, was less than $200. I had bronchitis so I had to leave the table a couple of times to cough. Alesia looked beautiful. The Russian ladies talked a mile a minute. Pasha couldn't begin to translate fast enough. LOL The next day we flew to Moscow, and a few days later we came home.

I Wish I Were On The Beach

The situation with Michael's behavior is becoming increasingly worse, and I am concerned. I've been upset about it all morning. I don't know the source of the problem. However, his teacher has made some remarks to him I am concerned about and so I have set up a conference.

Whatever other stress he has, an unsympathetic teacher is making it worse, not better. He has only been in her class a few weeks but his behavior has gotten bad, he's fearful and defiant, and I have to attribute some of it to the teacher. He was only rarely like this before he got in her class.

If I tell Michael to do something, he ignores me and does exactly what he pleases. Yesterday I told him to wear his new tennis shoes to school and he wore the old ones. Last night I made a point of hiding the old ones from him. I told him he wouldn't be getting them back. He said he would wear another pair of shoes, not the new Merrell shoes. I told him I would simply hide ALL his shoes except the Merrell ones. He didn't believe me. I said "Just watch, kiddo."

I learned with Alesia that I had to just take inappropriate clothes away from her, and thus we didn't fight about her clothes. If she wore something too small or tight, away it went.

This morning I was trying to hustle Mike out the door and his grandmother said "Before you go, please change the channel to Fox, Michael" [changing the channel is hard for her due to arthritis] and Michael reached for the remote on the kitchen table. I hastily said "Mike, no, I will do it, just give Granny a kiss because we have to go." He ignored me and grabbed the remote. I was so annoyed I grabbed it out of his hand. Then we had a 5 minute "discussion" about how he fails to listen to me and later learns I was right. He doesn't alter his behavior, though. He is SO stubborn.

He was a few minutes late to school and I wrote on the excuse that he was late because of his behavior. I didn't elaborate. He hates getting there late, but I think sometimes it's more important to talk to him than for him to go running in the school with things left unresolved.

Right before the channel changer incident, Mike had just sworn up and down to me that the paper I helped him prepare to turn in, about the topic of his social studies project, was incorrect. He refused to put it in his bookbag and give it to the teacher. I had to email the teacher to confirm I was right. He will not like it when I tell him that, but so be it.

I think there are a lot of stressors on Michael right now. He feels some pressure to perform at 5th grade level. He is totally capable of it, though. We all help. I explained decimals and helped him with homework last night while cooking dinner. Alesia helped him also.

There's also my awareness that he has become very attached to me, and now that he's not on his "best behavior" he is acting out because some old issues are surfacing. This is common for adopted kids, and actually a good sign. He knows he can be defiant and trusts I won't send him back.

Control is an issue - also common in older adopted kids. He hates being told what to do, and he's not used to it. He was used to charming the caretakers at the orphanage, and I think he just avoided his birthmom as much as possible which wasn't hard because she left him on his own a lot. I think I am the first real authority figure in his life. I don't put up with much. I tell him he has to obey or face consequences. [He gets time-outs and extra chores.]

He's also between languages. He has told me he regrets losing his Russian. I don't really reply because there's nothing I can do about it. I can't afford a Russian tutor. I think the regret is not so much he wants to be well rounded and multilingual, but that he doesn't know the right words in Russian or English to express his feelings.

I'm sure some of the problem is that he's 12 years old and starting puberty. He keeps insisting he has a hair [yep, ONE hair] under his arm. I point out that he has a mole, and he insists there's a hair there. I cannot get a microscope to confirm that. It's rather funny but if I chuckle he gets mad.

His body is getting large and ungainly. He has grown so much, so fast - 7 inches, gained about 20 lbs. - and his emotional state has not caught up. Last night after the movie we were having a tickle fight - something he loves to do - and he accidentally hit my nose with his head. I heard a small crunch sound. Felt like I had a broken nose there for a moment, the pain was so bad. I started crying. He was just stunned. Mother came out of her room and told him he couldn't play so rough any more. Ironically, I felt like a recalcitrant schoolchild. My nose isn't broken, but is a little sore this morning.

I have scheduled a visit to the therapist for Saturday. I hope she can talk him into telling her what he's feeling. We are going to tell him he's there to help Alesia. The therapist is skilled at getting reluctant kids to talk, and I am relying on that and prayer.

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I hate for the entire post to be all gloom and doom and kvetching on my part. I promised a fellow blogger I would post a list of 8 things that make me unique or different. It was hard coming up with that, but here goes:

1) I adopted a 13 year old girl who didn't speak English, in 2004.

2) I have spent a lot of time in Russia and Kazakhstan, but I have never been to California.

3) Until I was a junior in college, my ambition was to be a professional singer or actress.

4) I am missing a bone in my shoulder and therefore I cannot snap the fingers on my right hand.

5) I know 4 languages: English, French, Italian, and Russian. Of the three non-English languages, Italian is my best one. I don't have to read the subtitles when I watch The Godfather!

6) One of my ancestors on my father's side was a French Huguenot who fled France in the early 19th century due to religious persecution. His name was Pleasant Thurmond.

7) I am a third generation Elizabeth. My grandmother's middle name was Elizabeth, my mother's middle name is Elizabeth, and my middle name is Elizabeth. Alesia avoided that because she chose to keep Pavlova as her middle name. It was her last name in Russia. However, I hope one day she will have a little girl and name her Elizabeth...

8) My perfect vacation would be to rent a big house on the beach on Edisto Island and invite all my cousins and their families to come stay with me there. Edisto is a beautiful place, and not too commercial. I am thinking of me in a lounge chair on the beach at sunset, sipping Simply Limeade, listening to Bob Marley....

 

Hummingbirds

I've never just published a post with just photos before, but my cousin Mark sent me some beautiful photos of hummingbirds recently. Mark Embry is a gifted photographer. He has taken some very nice photos of Alesia, like the one below he took at the Atlanta Botanical Gardens. His nature photos are outstanding. Enjoy.

Oatmeal and Anxiety

It's Monday and it's a slow news day here in my world. I like to write every day, though, so just bear with me here. I got a review of The Women posted on my Scribblerchick site, if you want to check it out.

I tried the oatmeal in the slow cooker again last night and this morning it was terrific, in my opinion. Michael looked at the gelatinous oat mixture like I was trying to poison him at first, but changed his tune with the addition of some butter and brown sugar. It's still more healthy than a cold cereal, I feel.

The news about Lehman Brothers and Merrill Lynch this morning makes me nervous. I was awful at math and economics in school but one doesn't have to be a rocket scientist to be nervous in this economy. I don't normally pay much attention to bank mergers or even failures because lord knows I don't have any money to invest right now, but today's news upsets me. I have a dear friend, another single mom, who was laid off from her banking job and is struggling to make ends meet now, and working at Cracker Barrel. The employment situation in the banking industry stinks. I found an article on Reuters here that makes me feel a bit better. Sometimes lessons have to be learned, even by Wall Street titans. 

Money woes seem to be everywhere. Michael lost his wallet and I have a terrible time Saturday night getting him to calm down and brush his teeth and go to bed. I've told him ever since we bought him the wallet, that he must put his wallet and keys on his dresser every night, like a grownup. I also told him to not put all his money in one place. Did he listen to me? Nope. He stuck the wallet in a small plastic bag after purchasing a Gameboy game a few weeks ago, and now it's missing. I warned him not to put his wallet there but he didn't listen. He also didn't listen when I got home and found the bag carelessly tossed onto a table in the family room. Reminding him of his carelessness didn't help the situation.

I finally said to him, as he sat stone-faced in a chair in my room, "Michael, if you were with your birthmom and you lost a wallet full of money, she would hit you, right?" He didn't asnwer but tears slid down his face. "I am not going to hit you, ever. I am upset for you, and I am sorry about your wallet, but it's not the end of the world. You have a safe place to sleep, plenty to eat, and we will be fine. It is OK." He was anguished. It was heartbreaking to see. I finally got him to brush his teeth and calm down, but it was exhausting.

A Brief Rant

The site Adoption Under One Roof is a great site for all adoption related news. The lead article today is about Tom Cruise. In an article he talks about loving his adopted children and his biological children the same in this odd little news item here. Why is it so hard for non-adoptive parents to understand that an adopted child is loved just like a biological child?! The original article makes a good point - why can people understand falling in love with a total stranger, but not falling in love with an adopted child, and cherishing and loving them completely? I have been really pissed off about the articles and news items about Cruise indicating his biological child with his wife is his "first" baby. I've seen similarly insensitive items about Kidman's new baby saying she's a "first time" mother. They have no idea how insulting that is - like the older adopted children don't count. Aaaaargh!

A Day of Women

The weather today has been sort of bizarre. We have had a lot of wind today but not rain. The high was about 92. Hot and muggy and windy. I think we were feeling the edges of Ike. There’s a 40% chance for rain tomorrow and I really hope we get some.

 

We went back to a little Episcopal church near our house today,  St. Bede's. It was so nice for me to go back to the familiar service and prayers. I knew all the hymns, and the music to the allelujah, and I can recite the service by heart. Michael was intrigued. He had never been to an Episcopalian service before. It’s a tiny church, St. Bede’s, but a nice change for me. Michael loves music and the choir was about 10 feet away from us, so I think he found that intriguing. I found it a lovely experience.

 

Alesia said she didn’t like the church. I actually had a sip of communion wine and I think that didn’t sit well with her. I completely stopped drinking anything alcoholic shortly after she got home, but I think communion wine should be the exception. I had attended St. Bede’s for a little while after I got Alesia home, but then decided to go to a bigger church downtown. Then there was a Methodist church. We’ve done some church hopping in the last few years, and I so wish we could settle somewhere. It might end up that Mother will join St. Bede’s and the kids and I will go to a Methodist church. We will see.

 

The sermon was about Julian of Norwich Julian of Norwich. She was a nun who lived in England in the 14^th and 15^th centuries. She received revelations from God when she was, she thought, dying. She went on to live another 20 years and write about the revelations. I need to do some more research on her, but I found this fascinating:

 

She describes seeing God holding a tiny thing in his hand, like a small brown nut, which seemed so fragile and insignificant that she wondered why it did not crumble before her eyes. She understood that the thing was the entire created universe, which is as nothing compared to its Creator, and she was told, "God made it, God loves it, God keeps it." From here.

 

We did some work on Michael’s spelling words this afternoon. If he applies himself and thinks, he can do anything. His attention wanders a lot, though. I think there is something bothering him, but he can’t articulate it. He's been stubborn all weekend. I am going to take him to Alesia’s therapist and see if she can help him. I think boys at 11 or 12 normally go through a period of being difficult, but his past trauma may be making this worse than usual. I don’t know.

 

We set off to go to the movie late this afternoon, and I got screwed up and went to the wrong theater. Oops. No showing of the Mummy at 3:50 at North DeKalb Mall. So I had to decide fast on another movie. The only one that worked out with the time was The Women, a remake of the 1930’s classic, updated. This is from IMDB.com:

 

“Based on the classic 1939 film, The Women is a comedy about contemporary womanhood in modern Manhattan society and the power of female relationships. At the center of it all is Mary Haines (Meg Ryan), a thoroughly modern woman suddenly confronted with an age-old dilemma: a cheating husband. The ladies in her life swiftly rally to Mary's side, led by her best friend, magazine editor Sylvie Fowler (Annette Bening). But when Sylvie betrays Mary in a Faustian bargain, the entire group is shaken to the core, and two women face the most painful breakup of all -- their friendship. Eva Mendes, Debra Messing and Jada Pinkett Smith also star.”

 

I am going to do a mini review on the Scribblerchick site when I get a few minutes. We watched Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day on DVD – cute but very slight. More like a short story than a full movie. I think they would both do for mini-reviews.

 

Michael stated loudly that he was only seeing The Women under extreme protest. He wanted to sit in the car rather than see it. You would have thought I was making him drink strychnine. Yet, he watched the movie, intrigued, and laughed at the right places. I told him in the car going home he better get used to sitting through chick flicks because in a few years when he starts dating he will have to sit through a lot of them.

 

The Woman was well done and had some funny lines. It was startling to see Meg Ryan and Annette Bening looking so old, though. My favorite line was Bening’s, when confronted by a pushy salesclerk for anti-wrinkle cream; “This is my face. Deal with it.” [You go girl!]

 

The one thing I really didn’t like about The Women was that it took the view that a cheating husband should [or maybe can] be tolerated. I told Alesia in the car on the way home some wisdom handed down to me from my mother, who had gotten it from her mother: if a man cheats, divorce him. No counseling, no going back. Once the trust is gone, it’s gone. If he cheats once he will cheat again. I told Alesia she can always come home and I will help her get through a breakup. I don’t know if she really took me seriously but maybe in 10 years she will remember the conversation.

 

Tennis Champ

As soon as I got up this morning I turned on the TV to get an update on the hurricane situation. Fortunately, as the day wore on I learned everyone I know in Texas is OK, thanks be to God.

 

I also hear from my brother that he finally got to his vacation destination and is fine. Mother and I were vastly relieved. I am sure it will be an interesting story when he gets home in November.

 

We went to the Book Fair at Michael’s school this morning. He and Alesia both got some books, although he was tempted to buy some kind of cheap electronic memo device. I discouraged that. He got a Goosebumps book and a book of compiled Japanese anime comics, and other things. The principal was at the door looking to see what the children got, and chatting with the parents. She is an amazing person. It’s easy to see why her school is one of the best public schools in the area.

 

When we walked in, Alesia gasped slightly – I think is surprise. The school building is old, but it’s decorated with colorful animals handing from the ceiling, and many kids’ pictures and murals on the wall. Lots of bright colors. It suddenly dawned on me that Alesia had never been in an American elementary school. I think the schools in Russia are, from what I saw, pretty rundown, at least where Alesia is from. I saw photos made in her tiny village school and it looked dark and depressing.

 

Of course, Saturday means the grocery store. We came home and unloaded the groceries, and shortly after that Michael had to go down to the tennis court for his match. I went down at 4:30 after helping Alesia with some homework.

 

Michael’s doubles partner today was a little blonde dynamo named Gus. He probably doesn’t weigh 60 lbs, but he had a killer serve and he could really hit. Some of his shots were out, but many were great. Michael really liked playing with him. I had a chance to talk to Michael’s coach and he said Michael is really improving. I could see it. Mike and Gus WON! They were tickled to death. Michael’s coach gave him a hug afterwards, and Michael was just beaming. I took a lot of photos, and as usual only a couple were any good, but they are below.

 

Still more errands to do tomorrow, but we will get it all done somehow. We have a wind advisory around here of 30+ mph winds tomorrow – the last remnants of the hurricane, I suppose. I wish we could just get some rain from it. I have many blooms on my watermelon plants and I am nursing a hope we may yet see some melons in the garden.