It has been a busy day. I know I say
that every Saturday. I know I often end up just reciting facts on these weekend
blog posts. I want to try something a bit different tonight.
When I started writing Adopting
Alesia, my journal of her adoption, I sent out various copies of the manuscript
when it was a work in progress and I got back a lot of feedback, some of it
useful and some not. One of the best things I got was from Joanne, who has been
a friend since we were babies and is practically a family member. She said she
enjoyed the story but wanted to know more about how it felt, not just what
happened. So I did a complete rewrite and tried to include that information
every time I could recall it.
Today, lots of feeling moments. I am
going to focus on those.
Mike was an alternate for his team’s
city championship ALTA match this morning, so I got him up early and we headed
to the courts. As soon as we opened the door, we saw my neighbor, G [trying to
be discreet here] and her husband, T, pushing their new baby in a baby
carriage. I told Michael to come over and see the baby. We stood and chatted
for a moment.
The little baby, W, is so sweet and
innocent and tiny. I looked at him and felt sadness, at never having a baby,
and at the same time, relief. Babies take so much energy and effort, and they
are so helpless. I think I would’ve turned into a total witch if I had had
a baby. I don’t do well with little sleep. Short on sleep, maybe just 6 hours,
no big deal. Up half the night, and I turn into psycho bee-yotch.
Alesia and her friend Elena ate
breakfast downstairs with Mother. I frankly didn’t want to be around them.
Alesia was in a giddy mood, more bossy than usual, and more controlling. At the
same time, I had to remind her to be a good hostess to Elena. “Maybe, just
maybe, Elena doesn’t want cold pizza, hon,” I said, as I exited the
kitchen.
Michael spent the morning with his team, and I didn’t go. Heading to Kroger with Mother and Alesia felt like a throwback to pre-Michael days, and made me a bit uncomfortable. At the same time, he needs to be pushed out of the nest a little, to spend time with other boys particularly.
The team went to Chick Filet after the match. I asked Michael what he ate for lunch. His response? "Ice cream." He didn't eat a sandwich. I fussed at him, greatly annoyed. "I wasn't hungry!" was his only response. "OK, but you need to eat protein and no all that sugar," was my response.
We did some beach shopping while at
the grocery store, and that felt so familiar. We leave next Saturday for a week
in Hilton Head, SC, and a small condo on the beach. My family has gone there
for many years. Now that my aunt and uncle have passed, Myrtle Beach feels too
painful for Mother just now. Hilton Head is familiar. My parents owned a
timeshare there for years. Mother is excited to introduce the kids to the
island. I am just looking forward to sitting and reading a book, maybe for as
much as 20 minutes at a time, uninterrupted! Woo hoo!
I felt like laughing at myself as I
methodically unloaded the grocery sacks and built a condo survival kit. We will
cook in a lot, and save money. So what might be in our survival kit, enquiring
minds want to know?! The Thompson cooking basics: garlic salt, onion powder,
Lawrey’s seasoning salt, Soy Sauce, olive oil, Classico sauce, Paces chunky salsa,
Mother’s Starbucks coffee, my tea, potholders, coffee filters, Little Debbie
oatmeal crème pies to eat in the car.
I already have an exhaustive list on
my computer, and it will be revised countless times before the car is loaded up
next Saturday morning.
I took the kids to see the movie
X-Men, Origins, this afternoon. I thought it was a good film. However, I sat
there and had some bizarre thoughts, like, Hugh Jackman has a really small
torso, compared to his long legs. Danny Huston’s voice is sounding just like
his father’s voice, even though they don’t look alike. The Canadian Rockies are
the setting for a lot of the film – I have always wanted to go there. Well,
since I saw a program on Banf on A&E some years ago.
Mike played another T-2 singles match this afternoon. The kid was playing on a court in his own backyard. He creamed Mike. Mike only won about 4 games. I felt bad for him. He was hitting really well. He just needs to work on control, and strengthening his backhard.
Aside from getting eaten up by mosquitos and no see-ums, and watching Mike lose, I enjoyed being there. The parents were very nice people and I enjoyed chatting with them. That's one really enjoyable aspect of the T-2 schedule, meeting new people and chatting with them. I used to be very shy, as a kid, but now I enjoy encountering new people.
Driving out to the home where the
match was felt like a trip back in time, and surreal. The family lives in
Conyers, which is a tiny place southeast of Atlanta. Lots of rural acreage and
big homes, and horses. One minute you see some shack and feel like you’re on
Tobacco Road, the next moment a McMansion pops up. The country vistas reminded
me of East Tennessee, where I spent a lot of my growing up years.
On the way back, we stopped at what appeared to be a little country store, complete with signs advertising live bait and barbeque. We went in and found fishing poles stacked up just beside the door. Then we looked to the right and there was an Indian man behind the counter. It was just so incongruous. I expected a guy in overalls. The Indian man was very nice, but I said to myself, we aren’t in Kansas any more…
We had a different sort of evening. After dinner, I watched a DVD of the Robin Williams interview on Inside the Actor's Studio. The kids watched a TV movie in my room. I remember watching the Williams interview and laughing really hard. Last night, I recalled the first time I watched it. I was a different person then, pre-kids, and while I loved seeing him free associate ideas and funny cultural references, it felt a little sad. I don't think Williams' life has turned out too well - he had to go into rehab for drinking, his wife is divorcing him in California which is a real bear, and he's had heart surgery. Yikes. I have adopted two kids who will probably never think his standup is funny because they don't know all the cultural references in his work. However, he is a brilliant man and so gifted. I hope he life smoothes out. I know I have achieved a level of contentment I never thought possible the first time I saw that interview, around 2001.
