The Crab Chronicles

Crossed Signals

What a wild day. I got up early and started addressing envelopes and autographing books. There are a number of people who helped me, both in the adoption itself and in the writing and/or marketing of the book, so I had a lot of “thank-you” copies to send. Several went to folks with blogs who have promised to help me publicize the book. Since I have no marketing budget to speak of, I am relying on word of mouth.

 

It doesn’t help that Amazon is still saying they have no book. Aaaargh! There are sellers on there with books. [I hear Scribblerchick is an awesome seller… ;-) ]

After mailing the books, I tried to take Mike to therapy and there were crossed signals and he ended up not going. I will spare you the details.

 

Mother has had an upset stomach all day, mainly stress and grief related, I fear. Her dear friend Bud, who died last week, was the 6^th person close to her to die in the past 6 months or so, including her brother and sister-in-law. She is shell-shocked. It’s such a blow, Bud’s death, because he had been a dear friend for many years. Bud left behind a mentally disabled sister and Mother was worried about her. She finally spoke to Bud’s lawyer and is reasonably assured the sister is being well cared for – she’s almost 90.

 

I took the kids to lunch at a little Greek restaurant in Tucker. I was delighted with the food. I had a gyro wrap, and Greek potatoes. Alesia had a salad with chicken and Mike had a gyro wrap. Excellent food, and the prices weren’t bad. They had heavenly baklava. The slogan is “Once a week, go Greek!” which makes me chuckle. That has a rather different connotation to an English major…

 

I took the kids to Walmart, and what a fiasco. Mike got some flip flops he had been wanting for a long time. Once home, he fell in them twice. He is not used to that kind of shoe, having never worn it. Alesia comes up to me at Walmart with a teeny weeny pair of shorts, and I told her, she can wear those at the house or the pool, but not out in public. They were really skanky, tiny shorts. I was appalled. She acted surprised I would veto those hooker shorts! She didn’t buy them.

 

As we were debating her shorts, I noticed a black spot on her ankle. Once in the car, I asked her to show me her ankle. I couldn’t tell if it was a bruise or she had been drawing on herself. She refused to show me, or to say anything. I didn't yell, but I finally got out of her that it was a temporary tattoo. It had been on there several days and she hadn’t had a shower during that time. I told her she could spend the rest of the day in her room. I don’t approve of drawing on oneself, or tattoos, and we’ve talked about it many times. No means no.

 

Michael asked me today if it hurt to get my ears pierced. I told him it hurt like hell. Agonizing. I’ve warned him he better not get anything pierced.

 

I am so strict about the no tattoos or piercings, when they finally fly the nest the kids will probably look totally trashy in a day or two, but I hope not.

 

Bruce called tonight and I had to ask him, yet again, when he is taking the kids camping. He’s been talking about it since he got back from Iraq several months ago. Hopefully he can get it done the last week this month.

 

More shots of my babies:   

 

Michael has grown another 1/4 inch, in less than a month!

June Photos

Alesia just stuck her head out of her door and stage-whispered, “Mom, it’s raining!”

 

“OK,” I answered. It’s been raining all evening, with some thunder and lightning thrown it. Now is when I want my screen porch..

 

Really busy day, for all of us.

 

My friend Bronwyn, who is a teacher, tutored Mike for a couple of hours this morning in reading comprehension. He did beautifully, she said. I got a workbook that’s way too hard. Mom said she and Bronwyn couldn’t even figure out the answers. So we will get an easier workbook. She said he could probably do a 5^th grade book a lot easier, and it would sharpen his skills. She also suggested “high interest” reading material.

 

We got his CRCT scores in the mail yesterday. He scored in the acceptable level in all areas. His highest grade, surprisingly, was in Science. He scored in the Excellent range there. His lowest grade was reading. He should be able to manage the material next year, if he’ll just do the work.

 

Mike spent the afternoon at the pool with his friend Clay. Then they came back here and played water pistols, and according to Mom they were running all over the yard in their bathing suits having a great time. That is why I bought an older house with a big yard.

 

Alesia had a tennis lesson this morning at 11 but she said it was really uncomfortably hot. It’s already hitting close to 90 here every day. So next week her lesson will be at 9 in the morning, hopefully when it’s not too hot. She spent the afternoon with her friend Elena.

 

I had a lot to do at work, and time flew by.

 

When I came home, I made sure the kids were decently dressed, and we went down to the Foto Star in the mall and got pictures made. They don’t do a fabulous job, but they are OK. Maybe next year I can spring for better shots. The man at Foto Star was Chinese and spoke such heavily-accented, broken English, I couldn’t understand him. Alesia had to interpret. I got a number of different shots. Two are below.

 

I am busily getting books ready to mail, which is so exciting. There’s a nearby post office open on Saturday morning. A couple of my blogging buddies have offered to review it on their sites, which is wonderful publicity.

 

Lists Defining Me

I saw this cool list over at the Motherlogue blog I read and I wanted to give it a try.

4 Things I am looking forward to (in no particular order)

·       My birthday
·       Marketing my book, Adopting Alesia
·       Seeing Alesia get her driver’s license
·       Seeing my parents and grandparents in heaven

4 Things I did yesterday

·       Picked up sandwiches for dinner from Jersey Mike’s
·       Watched the movie White Nights with the kids
·       Went by the ATM
·       Comforted Mother [her friend Bud died]

4 Things I wish I could do

·       Be a full-time writer
·       Ride in a hot air balloon
·       Get all my first cousins together for a reunion
·       Drop a TON of weight!

4 TV shows I watch

·       The Today Show
·       Any show on HGTV
·       Dateline NBC [once in a blue moon]
·       Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? [once in a blue moon]

4 Places I would like to travel

·       California [been to Russia and Kazakhstan, not California, how weird is that?!]
·       New Zealand
·       Maine
·       New Mexico

4 Places I’ve lived

• Augusta, Georgia [home of the Master’s tournament!, but I hate golf…]
• Knoxville, Tennessee [where ah learned to say “fahve” instead of “five”]
• Athens, Georgia [Go Dawgs!]
• Atlanta, Georgia [for the past 16 years! a record!]
  

My Bucket List [things I want to do before I kick it - so far]

• Swim with dolphins
• See the Smithsonian museums
• Take a train trip across Canada in the summer, including Banf
• Become an excellent potter using a wheel
• Get to know my grandchildren and teach them what I love
• Grow all my own vegetables and fruits
• Get a screen porch
• Write a really good novel set in the south
  

MORE BOOK NEWS

To my amusement, Barnes & Noble is listing my book along with other books supposedly by me including one called How I Went to the Oscars Without A Ticket, which is indeed by someone named Dee Thompson, only he is a large black man. [Last time I checked, I am not.] I ought to send the other Dee a note, though, and see if we can do a book signing together.

If you want to get a copy of the book, Amazon is now listing plenty of copies. If you want an autographed copy, send me an email.

 

 

GREAT CAUSE

 

My buddy Hallie is doing a wonderful thing, giving folks the chance to donate to a great cause, organ donation, over at her blog. Please take a moment to see her most recent post. Every donation buys chances to win very cool prizes! 

Mothering Advice

Today got started last night.

Lesleigh came over last night and we had a nice dinner and an enjoyable visit. However, she left late, after 10, and then I had to have the mediation with Mom and Mike. So it was almost 11 when I stumbled upstairs to bed, and realized there were no sheets on my bed. I made the bed, with Mike’s help, told the kids good night, and then blogged. My brain was buzzing. I finally got to sleep sometime around 12:30.

At 5 a.m. I woke up with one of those mind-blowing sinus migraines that cause me to stagger into the bathroom whimpering. I took 2 Tylenol sinus nighttime, and went back to sleep. The next thing I know, music is playing and it’s 7:30!! The time I normally get in the car to come to work! Yikes. I got dressed and downstairs in record time, even remembering to grab my lunch and some filtered water out of the fridge.

By the time I got to work I was almost coherent. I had not wrecked the car. I tried to take that as a positive sign. Then life intruded.

I had emails to answer. Calls. Attorneys asking me things that required an answer. Even after stoking the caffeine machine that is my morning brain, it was tough. Then I got the pre-hotflash rumblings that make me kickoff my shoes and long for iced tea instead of hot. Plus, my sinuses were still achy. My eyes were running so bad I looked like I had pinkeye. Yuck.

Just before my second cup of strong tea, I said a prayer that went something like this: “Dear Jesus, please let my brain work today and let me be coherent and functional. I won’t ask for efficient, just functional. OK, maybe that’s too much… Just don’t let me screw anything up. Have mercy, OK??! Oh, and if we could turn off the mini hotflashes that would be awesome…”

The Lord is merciful. The day got better gradually, and by about 2 I was fully functional, and even productive. Hallelujah.

Michael left me a funny voicemail around 2, saying “Your books are here change your voicemail message.” He sounds like ET right now, with his voice changing. He doesn’t use pauses when he speaks. You have to listen carefully.

My books arrived, in two big boxes! I am beyond excited. I can't wait to send them out!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I was reading a funny blog post about snacks and it occurred to me that one of my work colleagues, who is pregnant with twins, has no idea what she’s in for in a few years. So I wanted to clue her in on things that nobody told me before I became a mom, things I had to figure out for myself.

1.      Accept the fact that after your kids are born, life as you have known it will cease forever. Expect to be in shell-shock mode for a while, even if you don’t have full-blown post-partum depression.

2.      After you’re a mom, you will likely have to limit your “alone time” every day to 15 minutes or so in the bathroom with the door locked. Keep earplugs in there.

3.      If your twins are the same gender, decide if you are going to dress them alike or not. There is no best choice. Just decide, and be prepared to defend your answer. 

4.      Don’t let the TV raise your children. Give them crayons, books, toys, etc. but not TV, except maybe one educational program a day. Kids raised by the electronic babysitter are usually nightmares.

5.      Decide how you feel about the kids in bed with you. I made a firm decision my daughter would never co-sleep [how’s that for being politically correct?] with me. However, that decision meant that I spent a fair amount of time in her room, doing things to get her to sleep. Soft music, night lights, etc. Bedtime is a challenging time. Last night, since we’d been watching Pink Panther, I spoke in a bad French accent when I went in to tell Alesia good night. I give her a Melatonin and a calcium supplement, and as she swallowed them she looked at me as though trying to make up her mind. As she handed the glass back she said, “I like you much better with that accent.”

6.      Talk to your kids, every day, about anything and everything. Tell them how you feel about things. Ask them how they feel. Listen carefully to their answers. Look in their eyes while talking. That will help bond them to you, and you to them.

7.      Take them to a church or other place of worship, regularly. Be a part of a faith community. If you don’t guide them along in their spiritual journey, they will find a religion when they get older, and you may be horrified by their choice. Children need God. They need to know they are not alone in the universe. Even if you struggle with your beliefs, give them a foundation of faith.

8.      As soon as your child can understand simple commands, teach them how to behave. Set limits and enforce them. You don’t have to spank, but you do have to spend a lot of time training a child’s behavior, and it’s one of the most important things you will do as a parent. Make rules and enforce them. We have an entire generation of kids who are out of control because their parents didn’t want to take the time to discipline them.

9.      Read everything you can on food allergies, because even if your child doesn’t have them, others will. At Mike’s first soccer match, I took in a snack containing peanuts. I was shunned, or viewed as the antichrist, and two of the boys told me I was a murderer.

10.     Model the behavior you want to see in your child. If you are nervous and anxious, the child will be, too. If you are kind and generous, they will be, too. Kids learn hot to act by watching you act. Never forget that.

11.     As soon as they are born, tell your children I Love You, every single day. Never let them go to sleep without hearing that message.

12.     How do you feel about homework? Starting as young as age 5, you are likely to have to be helping your child, every school night. I never did more than 15 minutes of homework at night, until about 6^th grade. Now my kids usually have an hour or 2 or 3, every school night.

BOOK WINNERS

Thanks, everyone for leaving comments! Jess and Becky - send me your snail mail addresses and I will send your book!

My Paper Baby

I got up early today and puttered around, stripping the sheets off my bed, drinking my early morning water, and it occurred to me to check Amazon and see if they had my book listed. I didn’t really think it was. I sat down at the computer, and THERE IT WAS! My book baby! Staring at me! I felt like whooping and hollerin’ and doing a Snoopy dance, but I didn’t want to wake the sleeping teens. I’d sooner waken a cottonmouth moccasin with a sharp stick.

Functioning in a normal manner has been a challenge today. My mind is a million miles away. I am only in my body as a guest, not an inhabitant, it feels like. I was on I-285 this morning zipping along and I realized I had been singing along with the car radio for 15 minutes and I couldn’t name a single song I’d been singing. I came back to full consciousness and found myself singing the Eagles song Take It To The Limit, which is a song I really don’t even like. For me, that was the equivalent of waking up naked and hungover, next to a stranger. [Not that I’ve ever done that.]

The last time I felt so discombobulated was when I first learned I was going to Russia for my daughter’s adoption hearing. I was so out of it that day that I forgot to vote in a presidential election. I was fixing to become a first-time mama to a 13 year old who spoke no English, though, so I had my reasons for being preoccupied, OK?!

Today, ironically, I don’t have to travel to the other side of the world to undergo a life-changing experience, but the reason I feel so weird has everything to do with my daughter’s adoption. My book Adopting Alesia is like my baby, my paper baby. [OK, I’m not going to get weird here, don’t worry…]

So, and I don’t want to belabor this, BUY a copy today! Review it on Amazon!

OR, leave me a comment. Why? Because I am having A CONTEST. Yay! Leave me a comment saying any crazy thing that comes into your head, I don’t care what as long as it’s clean, and I will draw names of two commenters and send them a free autographed copy of the book. I ask only that you read it and review it on Amazon for me. [If you can say something nice; if not, don’t say anything at all; that’s what my mama taught me..]  Reviews are not hard to do, and you get my undying gratitude AND a free book. How cool is that?!

Also, for local folks, just a heads up. I am having an Open House on Sunday, June 28, from 4-7, and you are welcome to come by and have a snack, and get your book signed. I will have copies to purchase, then, too.

This was made of the two of us just a couple of weeks after she came home in December 2004, and a more recent shot of her..

 

 

NOW BACK TO REAL LIFE

When I got home yesterday, the kids were in the back yard throwing a tennis ball back and forth. Bruce bought them a softball and a glove, so why they were throwing a tennis ball was a mystery. I went inside and asked Mother, who answered with steam practically coming our of her ears.

“I looked outside and Alesia was throwing that ball at Michael as hard as she could throw it. He was doubled over, trying to catch it! It obviously hurt his hand, and he was catching barehanded! And, Michael was standing with his back to the house! They could’ve broken a window!”

Mother is the child of a major league baseball pitcher. She was, um, irked.

“So I called Alesia over and told her, you can’t throw the ball that hard, it will hurt his hand! And she just said ‘no, I wasn’t throwing it that hard…’ and I TOLD her then, IF HE BREAKS THAT HAND YOU ARE GOING TO BE THE ONE WIPING HIS BEHIND!’

Mother paused for breath. I asked quietly, “OK, and?”

“Well she didn’t miss a beat, she just said Michael, get the tennis ball!”

 One of my favorite qualities about my mother is that she is so quiet and calm and diplomatic. I inherited that from her.

[snicker]

Alesia, aside from having a strong throwing arm, is becoming an excellent cook. She has helped Mother so many times that she is really developing a repertoire of dinners she can cook, and cook well. Last night I started making our version of Shepherd’s Pie, and she stepped in and shooed me out of the kitchen and finished it. It was very tasty, too. The thing I love about Shepherd’s Pie is that it is a one dish meal.

How we make Shepherd’s Pie: take 1 lb. of ground sirloin and brown it. Season it with salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion salt or powder [or you can cook onions and stir them in if you have time], generous shots of soy sauce and red wine or sherry. We don’t like bland beef. In a casserole dish, spoon the beef and then layer the other ingredients. We use next a layer of green peas, then a layer of mashed potatoes, then a layer of cheese. Alesia loves butter and she made extra mashed potatoes [from a box] and added 3 tablespoons of butter! Because she loves butter! [Nobody in my house has high cholesterol, fortunately.]

I had to help Mother get a bath, so when that was done I went to check on things with dinner, and it was done. She had also put new placemats on the table, set the table, and even gotten water for herself and Michael. The only teeny mistake was that she had forgotten to turn off the oven, but Mother fixed that.

Tonight, she helped Mother cook a pork roast.

Michael came home from tennis camp today, and finally took a shower. He had wriggled out of it yesterday and I didn’t realize it until I noticed his hair around bedtime. So he showers, then comes back downstairs in his sweaty, dirty clothes! He said he had no clean clothes. Mother hit the ceiling. Alesia saved Michael’s butt by finding him some clean shorts and a shirt, in his room. He doesn’t know where things are in his own room. Mother says testosterone addles men’s brains. I am starting to agree with her.

Michael and Granny and I had a mediation tonight before bed. Granny agreed to not bark at him like a drill sergeant, which she has done occasionally, and he agreed to do what she tells him. Of course, she only barks when she is irked with him, and her bark is worse than her bite. Michael gets triggered when someone speaks to him very authoritatively – when he was with his birthmom that tone of voice meant he was going to get hit, so when he hears it he freezes up and can’t think. We never hit the kids, of course. However, Mother has agreed to modify her tone sometimes and Mike has to do what he’s asked without excuses.

 

I told Mother if he doesn’t keep his part of the agreement, he is to be sent to his room for the rest of the day. I hope that won’t be necessary, but who knows. He will likely forget and get sent to his room at least once, but so be it. We have to be able to control him now, or he will be out of control soon, and he’s getting bigger and stronger every day.

 

He’s basically a sweet kid, and he and Mother get along well 90% of the time, but there are times, like today, when he stresses her out, and vice versa. So I hope we can compromise and learn to coexist peacefully…

Spilled Tea

EXCITING NEWS!!!

My book, Adopting Alesia, is now available on Amazon! You can order it HERE! Order your copy today, and tell all your friends! They will get it in stock this week, even though it says Out of Stock.

[back to regular post]

I had to get Michael up this morning earlier than usual, because he had am 8:30 orthodontist appointment. Getting him out of the bed took 5 minutes, some of it pulling and tugging, tickling him, singing the Itsy Bitsy Spider song, etc. - then he walked in my room and threw himself down on my bed face first and I had to repeat the whole process of getting him up. It finally occurred to me that I hadn’t said the magic words.

“If you will come on down right now, I will fix you a cup of coffee,” I wheedled. He hopped up immediately.

His “coffee” consists of about ¼ of a cup of coffee and the rest of the mug is filled with milk and sugar. He loves that. He is almost 13, and I only let him have the coffee on the weekends, so I do not worry about him turning into a caffeine addict.

I knew the day was doomed this morning when I tried to get out the front door and was blocked by several poops from Coco. She’s diabolical. She avoids the puppy pads and heads straight for a place like beside the door or in front of the TV where she knows we will eventually step, sometimes in our bare feet [ick! Poop foot!] and I swear I think she hides and laughs at us. I think the term “medically fragile dog” also implies “neurotic dog.”

Anyway, I got those poop booby traps cleaned up, and then realized we had to put out the garbage. So Mike grabbed a bag and I grabbed a bag and we raced the cans out there. Finally, we got to the orthodontist office, 5 minutes late.

The visit was finished quickly, and Michael’s bracket was re-attached to his tooth. That’s done in a long room filled with dental chairs. I sat down to watch and it was sort of comical, because each chair was filled with a gangly boy, all about Mike’s age. He looked small and compact, like a sumo wrestler among the bean poles.

I went home and got another mug of tea. My caffeine addiction requires two mugs of double-strength tea every morning. So I get in the car with it, and forget the mug is in my hands, drive a short distance, and try to make a left turn. I dump half the mug on myself. Hot tea baths while driving in traffic are not something I recommend. There was a lot of cursing. I was already late to work so I didn’t go home and change.

Now, I gave up caring about fashion years ago. I used to care. I used to dress nicely, in coordinated outfits, and makeup and jewelry, the whole nine yards. I even wore pantyhose, for years. No more. Now my fashion goals can be summed up in one word: Clean. Today, I failed to even meet that standard.

When I got home tonight I spent some time talking to the kids while I looked at emails. Mother sent me a funny email and one of the characters in the funny story was Italian, so I read it in a Godfather type voice. [Knew that acting training would come in handy one day.] When I finished Michael smiled and said “You sounded like that guy in that movie!” – but Alesia looked puzzled. “You mean I sounded like the Godfather” I asked. Mike nodded.

Alesia thought for a moment and said “What does the godmother sound like then?”

FUNNY ENCOUNTER

I went downstairs at lunch to get my chicken sandwich and orange soda, and I get in the elevator with a mousy looking young man. He’s holding a cell phone up and dialing furiously as he gets on the elevator. Then he holds it to his ear for a moment, listens, and says very softly, “I’m on the elevator NOW,” and hangs up. I’m thinking ooh, sounds like a mini-drama.

SHRINERS - PRAYER NEED

I was so upset to see here about the closure of 6 Shriner’s hospitals. Those hospitals are so vital because they help families who cannot afford it to get care for their kids with limb differences or orthopedic problems. We have benefited from Shriners’ generosity. I know so many families on the Yahoo group for adoptive parents of kids with limb differences who are just distraught over this closure threat. In countries like China and Kazakhstan and third world countries, kids with limb differences have no hope. Adoptions are often the answer, because in the US the kids can get great care through Shriners. In their home countries these kids face growing up shunned by society and reduced to begging. If these hospitals have to close it will be a terrible thing. Please pray that somehow the money will be found to help the Shriners keep their hospitals operational. [Bill Gates, where are you when we need you?!]

Horrible Day in Hot-Lanta

We’ve had a pretty decent day but I’ve been in a foul mood all day. I cannot explain why. Some of it is just plain old stress. Also, it has a lot to do with menopause and retaining water and surfing the dadgum Hormone Highway from Hell.

 

We went to church and went out to lunch. That was fine. As the day wore on I just got progressively more irritated. At one point Alesia asked me if I was upset because I had had to throw out some bad meat from the fridge. I burst out laughing.

I finally just told the kids, look, I hate that you have a Menopausal Mama but there’s not much I can do. The maca root is great but it doesn’t solve everything. Some days I will be singing, some days crying.

 

I also woke up with a sore ankle from water retention, so I have been hitting the water all day and even took a mild diuretic. It’s summer. It’s 88 degrees. I’m hot. I’m fat. Aaaaargh….

 

I am pondering what to do about my weight. Obviously it needs to go. Diets don’t work. I am looking into a program of meditation and visualization, called The Gabriel Method. That’s all I have to say about it, at this time.

 

I never have time to do those Facebook thingys where you name your favorite drinks or take quizzes or list your favorite books or whatever. If you send me something on Facebook and get no response, please don’t be offended. I can barely navigate the thing.

 

Here’s a list of my All Time Favorite Books – the ones I would take if I had to go live out my life on a desert island.

 

The bible

The complete works of Shakespeare

Gone With the Wind

The Journeyer, by Gary Jennings [huge book about Marco Polo]

The Prince of Tides, by Pat Conroy

Outlander by Diana Gabaldon

All the other books by Diana Gabaldon

All of Greg Iles’ books

Swiss Family Robinson [great book, plus tips for desert island living, eh?]

Queens of England, by Nora Lofts

Adopting Alesia: My Crusade for My Russian Daughter

Jack’s New Family [yes, so I’m biased!]

The poetry of William Butler Yeats

The DaVinci Code, plus the new one coming out soon by Dan Brown

When Life Is Sublime

We have had a really pleasant day. I was ready for it. Seems like I spent all last weekend in the car, and all last week at work trying to get caught up. Vacations are stressful, in their own way. If I had the money we would take two weeks. That’s more restful. Also more expensive.

 

I usually hate going to the grocery store. It had become a crashing bore, before vacation. Today, not so much. It was nice to be back in a store where I know where everything is, and what they carry. I was able to get some Real Limemade, which is my favorite summertime treat.

 

We went out to lunch at a Mexican restaurant near the house, one we hadn’t tried before. The food was excellent. We were impressed. Mother and Michael pigged out on the fresh guacamole. I just had tacos but they were terrific. Our favorite other restaurants have both closed in the last 6 months, the latest one we just noticed today, which was really depressing.

 

We are supposed to be coming out of the recession, but I still see people around me losing their jobs, businesses closing their doors, and other problems. Just today I talked to a friend who has been out of work so long she has had to take work as a maid just to keep her family together. She is a single mom and has two children to support.

I want to be optimistic about the country, but it's very difficult. I feel somewhat like singing the song from The King and I - "whenever I feel afraid, I whistle a happy tune..."

 

The kids and I went to see the new Night At The Museum. This one is set at the Smithsonian. We loved the first one. This one, not so much. It wasn’t as funny or as fast-paced. Even Amy Adams and Robin Williams, two really interesting actors, couldn’t save it. (I wanted to go see Angels and Demons but I was out-voted. Maybe next weekend.) The kids declared they loved night at the Museum, BTW.

 

I have a list of things I needed to do today that didn’t get done, but I don’t care.

 

You ever have a moment when you try and stop for a moment and savor life? I don’t have many of those moments because, well, life is really hectic, but I had such a brief spell today when life was sublime. After the movie the kids and I were in the car, and we had the windows down, and we drove for about 5 minutes to get to the Quik Trip. The sky was an amazing deep blue, dotted with fluffy white clouds, and the sun was shining. The air was not too hot – about 80 – and we were listening to “On Broadway,” sung by the wonderful George Benson. We weren’t talking. I took a little time to savor that feeling. In a few years the kids will be grown – Alesia is mostly grown now – and I am so glad I was able to enjoy that time, just enjoying the beautiful sky and the feel of the wind, and my kids contentment, because we were together and it was a beautiful day.

Nice to know there are beautiful views at the beach, like below, but there are also great views at home.

Educational Activities

When I got home last night I put Michael in the car and we went to a wonderful local store called The School Box.

Michael has taught himself to juggle two tennis balls and he was eager to show off that skill. Needless to say, he can juggle for about 15 seconds before the balls fall. He started walking into the store juggling and I had to holler at him to put those balls back in the car.

I found him what looks like a great reading comprehension workbook. He didn’t fuss about it. We also looked at some educational games. We don’t have any besides Apples to Apples - which is a terrific game. We got one called Brain Quest -  so far, so good.

We played Apples to Apples last night after dinner. I won, not surprisingly. I always want to recuse myself from playing but the kids insist I play. Each player gets 7 cards with things on them like “Wimbledon” or “strawberry shortcake” or “beer bellies” – and there is a word chosen. The word might be “exquisite.” I had a card called “weddings” so I put that down. The kids put down cards that made no sense so I won the word card. Collect 7 word cards and you win. We played it at the beach, too, and had a lot of fun. It’s a great way to teach vocabulary, and educate my kids on some cultural things that are unfamiliar with. For instance, one card I had last night was “Emily Dickinson” and another said “Ellis Island.”

The movie last night was Spanglish. I hated the movie when it first came out. I love Adam Sandler, who plays an unexpectedly dramatic role and does a fine job. Tea Leoni’s character was so obnoxious, though, I wanted to throttle her throughout the movie. It’s a complex film, and very thought-provoking. I enjoyed it more last night than the first time I saw it. If you have older kids it’s a good one for discussion, particularly about assimilating into a culture. The director is James L. Brooks, who did Terms of Endearment.

When I came home tonight, Alesia got a call from Elena and I took her over there to spend the night. Michael and Mother and I went out to dinner at Bambinelli’s, a wonderful locally owned place.

We came home and Michael couldn’t decide on a movie to watch. So, I finally just popped in a History Channel DVD on Russian history. He looked like he was going to vomit. Within 5 minutes he realized Russian history is actually fascinating, and watched for nearly two hours. Ha! I told him. It’s far more interesting than any silly Nintendo game. I told him if he’d watch the entire series of several programs on two DVDs I would buy him a new Nintendo game. Bribery works, with Mike. He likes social studies, although he wouldn’t admit it.

Creole Evening

I got up early this morning and buzzed around, happy the kids sleep in a bit during summer and I can get ready for work in peace. However, apparently parts of my brain stayed asleep. Important parts. After grabbing my lunch out of the fridge and pouring up some filtered water to take to work, I stopped by Mother’s room to tell her goodbye. She grinned broadly.

“Well, don’t you look springy this morning!” she said.

I thought huh? Just ‘cause I’m wearing a green shirt? Whatever.

I get in the car and I am on the interstate before I look down and realize why she said that. I am wearing light purple pants and a green shirt. I look like a huge mardi gras parade float. There is a matching purple shirt I should’ve worn, but I was in the closet and forgot about the purple pants right after I put them on.

Mother, next time you see me walking out of the house looking idiotic, don’t be coy or cute, OK?! Just tell me to go change clothes! You never hesitated to do that when I was a teenager!

Mother is reading the proof copy [prototype, essentially] of my book Adopting Alesia. She says she has to read slowly because it makes her cry. She is recalling that whole turbulent 18 month period of my life when I was adopting my daughter, and her part in everything. When I got it in the mail and could see the actual book, as opposed to my messy manuscript, I cried. It was like I had given birth. I didn’t feel the same when I saw Jack’s New Family, I think because it was more of a collaborative effort. Adopting Alesia is such a personal story, and it represents years of painstaking labor.

Here's what the cover looks like:

HOW COOL IS THAT??!!

 

I took Michael’s newly repaired Nintendo DS away from him last night. He has been playing it constantly for the past few days. He had to read an hour today before he could get it back. I made the rule and then forgot about it, but he needs to know I intend to enforce it. From here on out, he has to bank his reading time in order to get Nintendo time. Everyone in my family loves to read, including Alesia, and Mike has to be converted. If it takes 100 Come to Jesus meetings with him about the importance of reading, fine.

Michael also got a lecture about going to the pool. That’s a privilege too. I told him he has to sit and do a reading comprehension exercise in front of either Alesia or Granny, and get all the questions answered correctly, before he would be allowed to go to the pool. School is going to be torture next year if he doesn’t improve his reading comprehension this summer.

It’s a little sad, how fast Michael is growing up. Just two years ago, he was such a baby, acting more like a 6 year old than a 10 year old when I brought him home. I used to spend 10-20 minutes getting him soothed so he could sleep each night, in his own bed. Last night I noticed it was a much quicker process. A brief chat, a prayer, a quick hug and kiss, and I was turning off the light in a couple of minutes.

Alesia has gotten into a habit of verbally attacking me every night when I tell her to turn off the movie, it’s time for bed. “You’re not going to bed! Why do you SAY that?!” she demands. Tonight I finally had a Come to Jesus meeting with her on that issues. I told her “I’m going to bed” means, to me, I am going to write my blog, read a few emails, and try to take 30 minutes to myself to relax, and whether or not I go to bed is none of her business.

“But I didn’t know it was an expression,” she argued. “Anyway, it’s not true.”

She wouldn’t back down. I finally told her if I hear that again, she will spend the next evening alone in her room. I am that sick of it.

Aren’t teenagers a barrel of laughs?!

Before I forget, please go over to my buddy Hallie’s website, The Wonderful World of Wieners [as in dachsunds] and consider entering her raffle or donating a prize. Hallie almost lost her father 6 years ago until an organ donation saved his life. I donated a copy of my book to the cause. She is raffling off prizes to raise money. I have never understood people not willing to be organ donors. You can’t take your body to heaven, so why take your organs?!

We had delicious shrimp Creole for dinner and I asked Mother to write up the recipe for my blog. Here’s the result:

ELVA'S  EASY SHRIMP CREOLE

1 large onion , chopped  [not a sweet onion ]

1 green bell pepper, chopped

1 tbl celery seeds

6 or 8 cloves of garlic , chopped

Brown above ingredients in mixture of olive oil and bacon grease, if you have it. Using a hand blender, blend above ingredients til fine.

Add 2 jars any flavor Classico. We like the one with Italian Sausage.

Several leaves of basil, rolled and chopped  [could use about 1 tsp dried ]

Season to taste with Tabasco , red pepper, black pepper, Creole Seasoning , salt etc

Add about 1/2 cup of sherry [I use Taylor's cream for cooking]

Bring to a boil and allow to simmer slowly until about 10 minutes before dinner.[ can do ahead til this point ]

2 lbs cleaned, raw shrimp , add and bring to a full boil . Then simmer about 5 minutes or a little less.

       I use Kroger's frozen, cleaned  shrimp , rinsed under cold water  and it is fine.

taste, should have a little " bite"  to it , at least . I like more.

Serve over rice ............... with a green salad and garlic bread if you wish.

If you have leftovers , be very careful about reheating as the shrimp will become rubbery, quickly. It is best to remove the shrimp with a slotted spoon, then add back to the creole at the last minute.

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I FINALLY got the garden shots out of my camera. Try to control your excitement!

This is Mike walking by the bed of impatiens and lantana. he likes to water it very playfully. It's amazing the flowers survive...

This is our older garden, and it's full of tomatoes, squash, cukes and peppers!

This is the raised bed my brother made a few weeks ago. It's full of corn and beans and cucumbers!

This is the Melon Patch on the side of the house, with its respectable little watermelon and cantaloupe plants, and the GINORMOUS pumpkin that Charlie Brown could hide underneath...