The Crab Chronicles

Last Minute

Just in case you are curious, we are fine. Yesterday was another jam-packed day.We didn't have a vegetable for dinner last night because I was too tired to cook one. There were peppers and onions in the leftover shrimp creole, was my reasoning. I still feel guilty about it.

I also made another cake. I am getting where I can make those suckers pretty fast. Pumpkin Spice Cake with cream cheese frosting sounds pretty good, huh? Combining a cake and a vegetable - genius.

Mike got his retainer. We don't have to go back to the orthodontist until March! Yay. Maybe they will have some new People magazines by then. I only read them in doctor's office, to pass the time. Really.

Every time I see Mike pop in his retainer I think of the scene in Date Night where Tina Fey takes out her retainer and this big drool drops out of her mouth. I told Mike, no drooling in front of me. Maximum gross.

I took Mother to get her hair cut last yesterday afternoon. This is a production. Alesia went with us to help Granny out of the car. Often I can't find a parking place right in front of the place, and the heavy door is hard for Mom. A new girl cut Mom's hair.

After the haircut, when she walked back up to the cash register she gushed "I just LOVE your mama!" I said "Yep, everyone does."

The 2 year old in me wanted to shout "But she's MY mama! Hands off!"

I restrained myself from doing that.

So then I made the cake.It was lopsided, as are all my layer cakes, but I'm sure it will taste good and make their pants tight.

That's what it's all about, right?!

My brother, carrying on Dad's great family tradition of waiting until the last moment to buy gifts, emailed to say he had stuff for the kids, but what did Mother and I want for Christmas?? I wanted to scream "I've sent you a dozen emails with gift ideas! Can't you have saved even ONE?!? Because I have no clue now." All of my emails probably involved ordering something from a website, and that's not how he rolls. I just hoped, foolishly, he would get the spirit early. So I spent the entire evening trying to think of something from Sam's or Walmart that I want. A big bottle of fish oil pills was all that came to mind. I take fish oil every day.

I finally told him I want dirt and basil seeds. The kids got me a beautiful pot so I can grow basil indoors. My beautiful basil plants I nursed all summer got left outside and died. I was heartbroken.

He can handle potting soil. And seeds.

I told him to get Mother a nightgown.

Just kidding.

So I know where my brother is today: shopping. Judging by the crowds around the shopping centers yesterday, he will have lots of fun...

This is my brother on Thanksgiving, wrapping tater tots in bacon. Very delicious thing to make. Alesia wasn't helping; she just wanted a photo op. Don't hate her because she's beautiful...

A Home for the Holidays

A lady with the Dave Thomas Foundation sent me some promotional material regarding a wonderful Christmas television special that airs tomorrow, December 22nd on CBS. It's called A Home for the Holidays and there's more about it below.

Even though my kids were adopted internationally, I have many friends who have adopted domestically and/or from foster care, and we need to be cognizant of the many deserving kids right here in our own cities and neighborhoods that would love the chance to be part of a family.

HERE'S MORE:

The 12^th Annual A Home for the Holidays, in association with the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, is an entertainment special celebrating the joys of adoptions, which airs Wednesday, Dec. 22 8–9 PM, ET/PT on the CBS Television Network. It will include performances by Katy Perry, Melissa Etheridge, Maroon 5, Ricky Martin and Nelly.

 

Melissa Etheridge, Maroon 5, Ricky Martin, Nelly and Katy Perry will Perform

On this Moving Holiday Special, Which Tells Inspirational Stories

About Foster Care Adoption

 

The Hosts of "The Talk," Including Julie Chen, Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne,

Holly Robinson Peete, Leah Remini and Marissa Jaret Winokur,

and Actress Mira Sorvino, Among Talent Set to Present

 

THE 12TH ANNUAL A HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS, a new entertainment special to be broadcast Wednesday, Dec. 22 (8:00-9:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network, will include moving performances by Grammy Award winning singer/songwriter Melissa Etheridge, Grammy Award-winning group Maroon 5, Grammy Award-winning superstar Ricky Martin and Grammy Award-winning hip hop artist Nelly.  The show will open with a performance by pop sensation Katy Perry.  The hosts of "The Talk," Julie Chen, Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne, Holly Robinson Peete, Leah Remini and Marissa Jaret Winokur, as well as Academy Award and Golden Globe Award winning actress Mira Sorvino ("Mighty Aphrodite") will be among the talent set to present.

Following the success of the past 11 annual shows, the special continues to tell touching stories about foster care adoption to raise awareness for this important social issue.  The inspirational stories of these American families are enhanced by performances by some of today's most popular artists. 

 The musical performances frame several pre-taped story segments which are presented by celebrities who either have their own adoption experiences or are involved with children's issues.  The stories highlight many exceptional American children and families involved in this rewarding process.

 

·         Jimmy Wayne (Nashville, TN)

Country music artist Jimmy Wayne knows first hand about living in foster care. Wayne was abandoned at a bus station when he was 13 years old and shuffled through 12 schools and more than eight foster placements before he met Russell and Bea Costner, a couple in their 70s who opened their home and hearts to him. "I was 16 years old and that family changed my whole life, every cell in my body. I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for them." Wayne graduated from college and soon signed his first recording contract.

 

Today, giving back is a key part of Wayne's life. Earlier this year, he launched his MEET ME HALFWAY project with his seven-month walk halfway across America to raise awareness.

 

·         Anderson Family (Los Angeles)

Marsha and Corey Anderson were married 11 years and had three children when they began talking about adding to their family through adoption. Initially, Corey was hesitant, but had a change of heart after watching "A HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS." "The show took away my fears, and I was fully committed from that moment forward," says Corey. Featured on the show last December were foster children 6-year-old Ashley and her 4-year-old brother Jacob, who were waiting to be adopted.  "We thought we would adopt one child, but when we saw Ashley and Jacob, we knew they would fit perfectly into our family," says Marsha.

 

·         Cates Family (Los Angeles)

In 2001, Arthur and Mary Cates met 7-year-old Darnell at an adoption fair. In foster care since birth, Darnell had less than a 30 percent chance of ever being adopted. "When I saw Darnell in the play area all by himself, I saw in his eyes a sad little boy that needed to be loved," says Mary. Now 16, Darnell is a confident young man who is gifted in the arts. "I've experienced a new world full of hope and have overcome that sadness. It feels like I've been with my parents my whole life," says Darnell. The Cates decided to adopt again in 2007 when they met foster children Sierra and Phillip at an adoption event.

 

·         Carter Family (Missouri)

SWAT team paramedic Kasha Carter knew the plight of children living with neglect and abuse. "After we made entry into a home I often watched the children until Social Services came to place them in foster care. It really tugged on my heartstrings and I wanted to raise one of those children as my own," says Kasha. In 2001, single at the time, Kasha adopted a young foster child named Austin. "When I was first taken from my home I was just devastated. But then I met my mom and I was so happy because I knew I really mattered to her," says Austin. Five years later, Kasha met fellow paramedic Aaron Carter and they soon married. "I knew right away that Kasha was special. She had a big enough heart to take in a child," says Aaron. Today, Austin has made the honor roll and is the proud big brother to their 4-year-old son, Hunter.

 

·         Children Waiting

There are over one half million children currently in foster care in the United States, 114,000 waiting to be adopted. This segment gives voice to these children by creating an intimate portrait of youth who need permanent loving homes.

 

The special is presented in association with the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and the Children's Action Network.  Wendy's International founder Dave Thomas, who was adopted, established the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption in 1992.  It is dedicated to dramatically increasing the adoptions of the more than 114,000 waiting children in the United States foster care system.  Wendy's is a program sponsor.

 

 The Children's Action Network was founded in 1990 by leaders in the entertainment industry to harness the power of the entertainment media on behalf of children.  The special is a part of CAN's National Adoption Campaign to raise awareness of the joys of adopting and to find homes for the children who are waiting.

 

 

Short Note

It's been an abnormally busy day, and tomorrow promises to be more of the same. I have not had a moment to sit down at this computer until now, and I need to hit the bed in 5 minutes.

I did find a few minutes to read my friend Cindy L's beautiful blog message. She is absolutely right. Christmas is not about presents, it's about celebrating a sacred birth, a totally different thing.

The good part of the day was work, where I continue to enjoy what I do.

I also made a chocolate pound cake tonight that came out well. Mike said it tasted like brownies. I don't see that as a negative. I thought it was excellent. I'm not sure I will be able to share...

I took the kids to Best Buy after work and found a really cool present for my brother for Christmas. He is, like, totally impossible to buy for. It was a boxed set of the HBO miniseries Band of Brothers and it was 50% off. Yep, 50% off.

The bad part was I got into an argument with Alesia about the Boyfriend. I won't go into details. Suffice to say he's not behaving the way I think he should. I hate to see my little girl unhappy. It's so hard to try and let her discover truths and take actions on her own. I want to rush in and fix everything.

I am a closet helicopter parent. I have to admit it.

Mother says if I don't stop it she will ground me.

I am 48 years old and she still scares me sometimes...

The adventure continues...

Miracles, My Favorite Subject

As we count down the days to Christmas, I am delighted to hear of two different Christmas miracles. I think news of miracles needs to be shared, always.

My friend Danny's wife was in the hospital with a serious illness this last fall, and he had no insurance to pay the bill. He called the hospital to see if he could work out a payment plan, and was told there was no charge. The doctors donated their services and the hospital forgave the rest of the debt. Danny helped me tremendously with Alesia's adoption and he is a true soldier of Christ, so I was thrilled to hear this.

This lady who writes a blog asked her readers to help provide Christmas gift cards to some families in need, and got an overwhelming response.

Wow.

Miracles happen every day.

A miracle was what I asked for years ago, when I felt like my heart would never heal if I didn't have a family of my own. As a result, God sent me two children that are living miracles, to me. My heart is healed from all the heartbreaks I suffered from too many failed relationships. I am at peace.

So I am cognizant of miracles. I think of them as a sort of Godly magic.

I asked God for months to help me be able to have a job where I could support my family AND get to write, and that miracle is manifesting itself. I am doing a job I truly enjoy, and we are getting by financially.

I think a lot of Christians are reluctant to ask for miracles, thinking it's rather arrogant. I don't think that way. I wonder sometimes how on earth God can accomplish what I ask, but he always does it.

Example: I thought the only way to truly have a "family of my own" was to get married and produce babies biologically. I was flat wrong. God showed me that - after I asked for a "miracle" - a family.

As recently as a few weeks ago, I was wondering how I was ever going to be able to afford any Christmas presents for my kids. Well, I have them, under the tree. I won't go into the details, but I didn't rob a bank or get a handout.

We've had a fairly hectic day, between making a cake and delivering it, and getting everyone to the grocery store, and reminding Michael to feed and walk our neighbors' dogs twice.

Tonight, I sat down to watch The Nativity Story with Michael. He has never seen this story of Jesus, and he is fascinated by it. When we turned it off to come upstairs he said enthusiastically "That's a great story!" I laughed and said "It's THE greatest story, Mike, the most important story in the world." We didn't quite finish the movie and I wanted him to experience it without me pushing too hard.

Just trying, step by step, to build the foundations of faith in him.

What a miracle that my child, born in dire poverty in a remote corner of the world now has a loving family in one of the wealthiest countries in the world??

Miracles happen every day.

A Fun Evening With Dear Friends

It was a dreary, cold, rainy day, but a nice evening. Mike and I went and ran errands early, including picking up some shrimp at our favorite seafood store.

I spent the afternoon straightening the house and making shrimp creole. I used Paula Deen's recipe and it turned out really well. I used all the ingredients, except I made more than she did, because I was feeding six people.

A couple of weeks ago I emailed my friend Bronwyn about coming over to dinner, and Les. She and Lesleigh were instrumental in staying in touch with Alesia when she wasn't living at home. I wanted to say Thank You to them, because they both deserve huge thanks. During the recent time when Alesia and I were estranged, which only really lasted a few weeks, she knew Bron and Les were there if she needed them, loving aunts there to guide her. They both have remarkable patience. The visited her and talked to her, trying to get her to see that she needed to make better choices. Eventually, she saw the light.

Alesia wrote them heartfelt notes of thanks, too.

We had a lovely evening, visiting and talking. I made shrimp creole, rice, a green salad with mushrooms, french bread, and lemon pie. It was not a fancy dinner but everything was homemade and it turned out really well. Mother said I had some gumption, to make shrim creole for a lady who grew up in New Orleans [Bron]. Bron said it was great.

Mother's salad recipe is what I used. She makes a dressing of olive oil, fresh garlic, and lemon juice, plus salt and pepper. At the last moment she tosses the Boston lettuce and mushrooms in that. It's wonderful. The kids happily ate big servings, and Mike cleaned up the last salad in the bowl, so I didn't have to worry about leftovers.

The lemon pie was a bit runny, but it had a great flavor. I used a recipe my aunt Diddy gave us years ago, but ironically, Paula Deen's Lemon Meringue Pie is almost exactly the same. I don't make meringues well, and I used one less egg yolk. My recipe is just two cans of sweetened condensed milk, a cup of lemon juice, 4 egg yoks, and a drop of almond flavoring. You pour it into a graham cracker crust and let it firm up in the fridge.

Here are some photos from the evening:

Road Test

I cannot believe today is ONE WEEK from Christmas day! We are not ready. We have a tree and some presents but otherwise we are SO not ready. I need to buy stuff for Christmas stockings. We need to figure out the rest of the baking...

I imagine many of you out there are in a similar situation.

Without further ado, here's the news of my world.

Yesterday was a banner day for Alesia. She got her driver's license!!

I thought she'd have to take the written test again. She didn't. I thought I'd have to sign something saying she'd driven the required 40 hours. Since she's 19, I didn't have to do that. She took the test, signed a couple of papers, and got the license.

She didn't even have to stand in line for an hour to get her photo made. When you go up to the window, there's a camera there and the photo pops up on the computer. It's very high tech, up in Gwinnett County.Of course, the asked the guy to take her photo again. Nope, no dice.

For a brief period of time, the PMS abated. She has been in a foul humor most of the week. Boyfriend had car issues and she didn't see him for 5 days.

She has, on the plus side, been a help around the house the past week. She's always sweet about helping Mother. And she's been cooking. Yesterday she made banana bread and pasta salad with no supervision.

She has learned the Cooking Commandment of our family: leave no food un-seasoned. God made garlic salt and onion powder for a reason. [for those of us too harried or too lazy to peel and chop garlic and onions]

IN OTHER NEWS

Michael is still getting used to not having braces. He ate popcorn for lunch yesterday, and again for a snack while we watched a movie. We all marvel at the whiteness and straightness of his teeth. 

I am hard at work on a writing project at work, helping organize and edit content for a website. I am enjoying it very much, and learning a lot.

Today it's warm and rainy. Not a good day to grocery shop. Nevertheless, I will have to run over and pick up some things at Publix, including turkey for Coco. We are having dinner guests.

Y'all have a great day...

LAGNIAPPE

My aunt sent me a recipe that sounds fun and tasty.

TACO SOUP

 

2 lbs. ground beef -  brown and drain

1 onion, chopped

1 envelope Taco seasoning mix (Original or mild)

 

Add with meat:

28 oz. can crushed tomatoes

10 oz. can tomatoes with green chilies (Rotel brand)

2 small cans Mexicorn  (or 1 large can)

1 16 oz. can kidney beans

1 16 oz. can pinto beans

1 envelope dry Ranch salad dressing mix

 

Simmer awhile, and serve with shredded cheese and sour cream.

Good with Fritos.

 

Makes a large pot of soup; freezes well.

 

 

Quick Recap

The arctic cold has left, and now we have what Mother calls "tornado weather" - warm and rainy.Hate driving in rain. Then again, it's better than snow or ice.

This morning's ice was no big deal. I got out with the kids this morning and did errands. Mike didn't need to go to school until nearly 11 and I would've had to take him out at 11:30, so I waited and took him after his noon orthodontist appointment.

We are delighted with his teeth. The braces were worth every penny. His teeth are beautiful now. I will post a photo soon. Tried taking some today but he looked sort of evil, like an escapee from a Chucky movie.

I finally got into work about 2. I was assigned a really interesting project, working on a new website, and it totally preoccupied my mind until almost 7 tonight. Then everyone in the office went out for a holiday dinner at Maggiano's. Wonderful meal, delightful company.

Now, I am ready to collapse.

Tomorrow morning I take Alesia to take her driver's license test. Oh boy...

 A FUNNY

TEXTING ABBREVIATIONS FOR SENIORS

  

BTW .......... Bring The Wheelchair
BYOT ......... Bring Your Own Teeth
DWI .......... Driving While Incontinent
FWB .......... Friend With Betablockers
FWIW ......... Forgot Where I Was
FYI .......... For Your Indigestion.
GOML ......... Get Off My Lawn
GTG .......... Gotta Groan
IMHMO ........ In My HMO.
IMHO ......... Is My Hearing-Aid On?
JK ........... Just Kvetching
LOL .......... Living On Lipitor
LWO .......... Lawrence Welk's On
OMG .......... Ouch, My Groin!
ROFL - CGU ... Rolling On The Floor Laughing - Can't Get Up
RULKM ........ Are You Leaving Kids Money?
SUS .......... Speak Up, Sonny
TGIF ......... Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)
WIWYA ........ When I Was Your Age
WTF .......... What's Today's Fish?
YYY .......... Yadda, yadda, yadda

Remember the Children

My friend Kim over at Adoption Ark asked me to share my story about my son Michael's adoption, and I promised Kim I would share it here, too. Below is Kim's email that I wanted to share.

 

With the New Year approaching, Adoption ARK has been evaluating the project needs for 2011. During this evaluation we noticed that the adoptions of children with special needs, as well as older children, have dramatically declined while the need is rising.

Why does the number of adoptions for children, who are in the most need, continue to decline? 

While there are many parents who would love to open their hearts and homes to these children, coming up with the funds to cover international adoption expenses can be challenging for many families. In the past, Adoption ARK has been able to help parents adopting children with special needs and older children through our grant programs. In the past 3 years Adoption ARK has awarded thousands of dollars in grants toward such adoptions. We have a passion and a lifelong commitment to supporting the children who are most in need of our help. We know that you do too.

In 2011, Adoption ARK would like to continue offering grants for older children and children with special needs.  Dee Thompson is an adoptive parent that was awarded a grant for her son Michael.  She writes...

I started the adoption of my son in 2006 and brought him home from Kazakhstan in 2007, when he was 10 years old. Michael is 14 now, and just the light of my life. Adopting him was one of the best decisions I ever made. He is funny, smart, makes excellent grades, and despite his lack of a right hand he is a powerful tennis player and baseball player. If Adoption Ark had not given me a grant for his adoption, I know I would've been too discouraged to pursue it. - Dee Thompson 

Please click here to watch Michael's inspiring story.

Please kindly support Adoption ARK’s grant programs:

Donate $20, $50, $150, $250, $500, $1000, $5000, or more.  

Please mail your gift to:

Adoption ARK

830 Buffalo Grove Road, Suite 103

Buffalo Grove, IL 60089

-or-

You may donate directly to Adoption ARK using Google’s secure checkout at http://www.adoptionark.org/public/pag195.aspx.

General donations are appreciated or you may donate to an adoption in a specific country, a specific need, or even a specific child.  Email us for more details on children waiting to be adopted.

As a 501(c)(3) organization, all donations made to Adoption ARK are eligible for a tax deduction.

Thank you so much for your generous help!

Many blessings to you and your family,

The Team at Adoption ARK

Visit Adoption ARK:
www.adoptionark.org 
www.youtube.com/adoptionark 
www.facebook.com/adoptionark

Icy Morning

We're having our first weather event here in the ATL. I got up this morning only to get on the computer and see that schools are delayed two hours due to ice.So Michael gets to sleep in a bit.

Just before we sat down to dinner last night, around 7:30, Lesleigh called and wanted to make sure we were all at home. She gets off work rather late and she said traffic all over town was a mess due to black ice. Channel 2 reported on the mess.

We don't get pretty snow much here, we get ice. Atlanta is famous for its ice storms.

There's a famous story of one of my Thompson uncles, Lewis, driving down here from Virginia for a family funeral in the winter and having to stop and get a hotel room due to the ice being so bad. He was 6'4 and he had to get on his hands and knees and crawl to the office to check in.

I was going to run some errands this morning before taking Mike to the orthodontist but maybe not, considering the mess.

Y'all have a good day.

Hair and Fashion and Being Over 40

I am going to say something you almost never hear, not from a woman anyway. Are you ready for it? Here it is: I LIKE my hair.

Almost every woman I know hates her hair. I like mine.

Now, is it perfect? Nope. It's dark brown, not my original reddish blonde, and there are many gray strands in it. It's never perfectly styled. Right now my bangs are too long. However, it's very wavy when it's this length [short]. The length means it's not being pulled out straight.

My hair doesn't have to conform to someone else's definitions for me to like it. When I look at it I see my dad's hair, or my grandmother's. I think I look OK for 48 years old. [My Mamaw used to say "A woman who will tell you her age will tell you anything!" - which I have always found funny.]

Why are we conditioned to always want different hair?? It truly puzzles me. My daughter has gorgeous curly hair, yet she spends hours straightening it.

Here she is with it straightened:

Of course, in the photo above she has on makeup and she's smiling.I like her natural hair better, though. I rue the day she talked me into buying her a straightening iron.

A friend of mine is getting ready to turn 40, and posted that on Facebook. I commented and told her turning 40 was very liberating for me. I quit obsessing over finding a husband. I quit worrying about looking and being perfect. I started to accept myself and like myself. I don't miss my frantic 30's, not one bit.

People talk about youth like it was some fabulous time. I mostly remember working my butt off either in school or at work. I remember not having any money to go out and party and have terrific times. Now, it wasn't all awful. I certainly did some fun and interesting things, including a trip to Europe when I was 25. I mostly remember being impatient, though. I felt like my life would really begin when I found a boyfriend or a man, and "settled down." My mother kept telling me the right guy was out there, if I just kept looking.

Well, he wasn't out there. He's not out there now. I don't care.

Or maybe he WAS out there, and he got killed in an avalanche, or was injured in some freak accident with a nail gun. Who knows?!?!

I know this much, and this is liberating: I do not live my life any more trying to please anyone else. I don't obsess over men. I don't worry about being short, or fat, or gray haired. My eyebrows can grow like Andy Rooney's and I don't care.

I read something the other day that said in Hollywood there are three ages - young, old, and "you look great!"

They need to add another one: I Don't Care.

I wish we'd teach our daughters they look beautiful without globs or makeup or hair products or tight clothes. I know, you're snorting in derision.

I am going to keep right on wishing and dreaming and hoping, because people DO evolve. Things DO change, over time.

The ideal female form in the early part of the 20th century was a woman with a tight corset to make her waist impossibly small, hair piled on top of her head in an elaborate coifure, and shoes with pointy toes and heels.

Wait a minute. Let me think about this...

At least we've ditched the corset, and we can wear pants in public now.

 1910 frocks, with huge hats to accommodate the huge hair!

This is from the Spring 2011 Marc Jacobs collection.

Oh dear...