The Crab Chronicles

What I've Learned

It's been a weird and interesting day, interspersed with a slightly off-the-routine day, and at times it's been boring, but that was only when I was trying to be quiet while Mother napped.

Life is like that sometimes.

I was looking at a photo of the brother of a friend of mine on Facebook and I nearly screamed and jumped out of my chair. This guy looks EXACTLY like his father, like a CLONE of the man, and since his father died a couple of years ago it was ultra-freaky for me. I spent a lot of time at my friend's house when I was a teenager, and I knew her dad pretty well.

I now believe in cloning.

My brother and I look like an interesting mishmash of both our parents. That's how God intended it.

I am sure, however, that giving me Mamaw's short fat legs and extra padded butt was a MISTAKE.It was the work of the devil.

I am so glad my daughter didn't get those genes.

Thank you, God.

I have also learned that fruit isn't always as important as my son says it is.

I bought Michael two persimmons at Publix the other day, and he had a fit over them. Why anyone would want to eat freaky little semi-pumpkin sour thingies from Chile, I don't know, but he has bugged me now for several days to let's go to Publix and get some more.

This morning I had to run to Kroger and pick up a few things and I told Mike he could check on the persimmon situation there. I forgot about it, however, until we got into the checkout lane. I looked across the store to the produce section and told him to run quick and see if they had an persimmons. He shrugged, said "I'm too lazy," and walked off to look at the cell phone display.

I bought some croissants on sale at Kroger and my aunt and uncle each took one, ate one bite then tore them into pieces and pushed them around on the plate for the remainder of the meal. I am now certain the croissants were borderline stale and I made a huge mistake. HUGE. I concentrated on ham, pasta salad, chips, and brownies.I avoided the croissants.

Obviously the words MANAGER'S SPECIAL are code for STALE OR ALMOST ROTTEN.

Life lesson learned.

I wonder if the squirrels will eat croissants?!

Here you see my aunt and uncle and my mother, who will scream and vomit berate me soundly when she sees this photo. She did NOT have on enough lipstick.

The battery was dying in my camera as this was taken, and so I couldn't do re-shoots that were more flattering to Mother.

I will probably be cut out of the will but so be it. We had a nice visit with Don and Jane.

So here's another shot of Mother, a much more flattering one:

She had just stolen the gown from that hussy Peggy Lee after slapping her around for a bit.

Just kidding.

Mom with laryngitis is a much better singer than Peggy Lee ever was.

I used to play dress up with Mom's dresses when I was a little girl. Me and my best friend Joanne would wear Mom's old recital dresses and her hoops and make "wands" out of drinking straws and colored paper, and go sashaying around the house pretending to be fairies. My brother would get so annoyed at us he'd scream and run bury his nose in a book to get away from our silliness.

I can't imagine why he was so uncomfortable. The dog loved being a lady in waiting.

I never dreamed that one day I would grow up t
o plant jungle foliage in my back yard. Or to split a sentence like that. Wow.

These are roses I planted a few weeks ago, and you can see a gardenia in the foreground that badly needs trimming.

These are my flowers on the front patio. It just occurred to me if I fertilize them, they might bloom.

Well, duh.

Tomorrow morning when it's not 95 degrees I will work on that.

I learned that photography exists to make me feel guilty about my flaws as a gardener...

My favorite moment today was when I learned that the secret to happiness is teaching your child something very important.

This morning on the way to Kroger I was in the car with Michael, trying hard not to scream cry vomit say anything negative about listening to the "music" he likes. The "song" ended [I use quotes because the electronic blips and mumbling really don't qualify as music] and I punched in the classic rock station.

Then we were treated to Mick Jagger singing "Satisfaction." I cranked it up and made him sit there and listen while I sang with Mick "I can't get no-o Sat-IS-FACT-Shu-UN." He said "That's bad grammar, Mom." Smartass. I was groovin' along, singing, enjoying the heck out of the CLASSICAL music. I knew Michael was digging it when he said "Uh Mom? Can you NOT sing along?"

So I have learned that Michael can appreciate classic rock. YES!

If you want to share the delightful song, look here at the vintage version. Mick was hot when he was young. Now, not so much, but Grandpa can still jump around and dance, as you can see here. He must take glucosamine for arthritis...

But really, Mick needs to stay home and enjoy his hobbies, which probably include scaring the beejeebers out of his grandchildren...

I just realized I covered cloning, gardening, persimmons, and Mick Jagger, all in one blog post.

If you've read this far, thank you...

Back to Normal [Almost]

I know most folks are heading back to work or school and the long holiday weekend is over, but for us it has been extended. Mother's brother Don and his wife Jane are coming by for lunch today, which is always a fun visit.They live in north Carolina.

I got up early yesterday and early this morning to run outside and water my gardens. If I wait even until mid morning it's already getting muggy. The high today is supposed to be 98, and it will be humid. I plan to stay inside all afternoon.

Michael played in the finals of our pool's round robin tennis tournament yesterday. He was hitting so hard he broke ths strings on his raquet, once again. Fortunately his doubles partner let him borrow her spare raquet. He played hard and hit some awesome strokes. He was putting a lot of spin on the ball. He lost, but only in a nail-biting tiebreaker.

I so wish I could get a job, if only to be able to pay for him to go to tennis camp or to get some additional coaching.

I sent out a lot of resumes over the weekend. I also finished the final edits on my book.

PRAYER REQUESTS:

Two of the little girls in Kazakhstan that are sponsored by Antares Foundation are in Almaty [the capital] for surgery. Please say a prayer for them.

My friend Stephanie is making preparations to go to Bulgaria to adopt three special needs children. Please hop over to her site if possible. She's collecting donations for orphanage supplies.

Please pray I will find a job this week!

Fun Activities With Kids

I belong to a Yahoo group for single adoptive moms and there are always good discussions on there about how to manage as a single parent, how to have fun times with your kids without spending too much money, etc. I get so much from reading discussions on there. I really value the Yahoo groups I belong to that are active because they are great resources.

One mom asked us the other day to suggest activities she can do with her child. I had to ponder that one for a while.

Cooking is one of my favorite activities and I love to cook with my kids. Michael makes wonderful guacamole and it's one of his favorite foods, and very nutritious. He mashes up avocados, diced tomatoes, lime juice, salt, and chopped onion. It's almost like a salsa, but that's OK. Alesia is mostly just coming in and out and eating sandwiches these days but she loved sandwiches so that's OK.

Here's what I said about activities in general:

I have never had a baby, so most of my ideas are aimed at older kids, but just file these away for future use:

- gardening. My kids help me in the garden and I talk about what kinds of plants we have, and shrubs, and how to make things grow better, etc. My kids love to go hunting in my overgrown gardens and emerge with tomatoes or peppers. They've also been to the local Botanical Gardens.
- find parks or nature trails near where you live, and take a picnic
- sit and watch a movie with them, and talk about the movie. You don't have to watch boring kiddie stuff or all Disney. Watch older movies like Superman, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Mary Poppins, or The Secret of Roan Innish. Movies can provide a lot of casual teaching moments. I have had Netflix for years, and only I order the movies.
- go swimming with your kids, together. Help them learn to swim or float, and you stay in there with them.
- tell your child stories, either true or made up. I started telling my son stories about our family when he was still in the orphanage. helped pass the time and I had an interpreter there.
- rub your child's back. you don't have to know professional massage. I also play Itsy Bitsy Spider on Michael's back and sing to him. He's almost 15 but he still loves for me to rub his back.
- play hangman. it's a good way to teach spelling words. we also play Scrabble, and Monopoly.

It's all about talking with your kids, not at them. I've had fun making this little list, as it's brought back some nice memories...

A Funny Happy Day

We had a good day yesterday, the first on this holiday weekend. I have to keep reminding myself it's a holiday weekend. When you're not working, a Monday off is not such a big deal.

I had my old friend John over for dinner last night. He is practically family, as we've known each other since third grade. We swapped stories all evening. John is a natural comedian.He can make me laugh like nobody else can.

One thing that really made us laugh was recalling a colorful TV evangelist in Knoxville, Revered J. Bazzell Mull. He had a raspy voice and was quite a character. His wife, who he called "Lady Mull" had a Marge Simpson type beehive hairdo and a serene disposition, and was a total contrast to him. They lived in the same neighborhood as John, just a mile or so from my house in Knoxville.

We also recalled the time my dad saw Dolly Parton in the Knoxville airport and introduced her and her manager to my uncle, who had no idea it was Dolly until they left and Dad told him in the car. She was without her crazy getups and wigs and looked perfectly normal - which for her was a disguise. LOL

So last night was a "grownup" evening, for the most part. Alesia had to work, and Michael was playing in a round robin tennis tournament down at the pool.

When Michael came home around 9:30, he ate the steak I had grilled for him, and a big salad. Mother said they were the best steak ever. We found them on sale at Publix.

Alesia's new boyfriend, Richard, came by yesterday afternoon, and we were able to have a good visit with him while Alesia clipped Coco upstairs. He works and goes to school, and is starting Georgia Tech this fall, studying Engineering. He comes from a Christian family and he lives at home and has a cute dog. He is smart and funny. Mother and I both agreed, he is the best boyfriend she's had so far. He's also a bit older, 23, and that's good. We're just praying she doesn't break up with him.

FUNNIES

A friend of my moms sent me a funny, paraprosdokians (A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part.  It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect.)

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it."
-  Groucho Marx

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
   
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
   
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a  car.
   
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
   
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
   
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
 
We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.
   
War does not determine who is right -- only who is left.
   
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
   
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
   
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening,' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
   
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research .
   
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a  train stops. My desk is a work station.
   
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
   
Some people are like Slinkies ... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
 
Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on  the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
 
I  thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted pay checks.
   
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
   
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR."
   
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
   
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it... So I said "Implants?"
   
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
 
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a  bald head and a beer gut and still think they are  sexy.
 
Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?
   
Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
   
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
   
The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
   
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
   
Hospitality:  making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
   
Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
   
I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my  foot.
   
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
   
There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.
   
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
   
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
   
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
   
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
 
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
   
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
   
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Observations from the Sandwich Queen

It's been rather a stressful day here at my house, for a number of reasons, so instead of sitting around wallowing in my angst and wringing my hands with worry, I thought I'd try to lighten the mood a bit with a few observations.

Yes, it will become apparent from reading these that the source of tension at my house was an inter-generational conflict between Alesia and Mother, but Michael's antics didn't help.

I, the Sandwich [Generation] Queen, tried to make peace in the house and appease both sides. When that didn't work, I fled to the grocery store and took Michael out of the line of fire.

Anyway, here is what I have learned recently:

No matter what happens, I will always hate the crap music my daughter loves.Pop music has now officially gone completely to hell and it should all be destroyed.

This is an example of what my kids like now, by an artist named "Pitbull" - Give Me Everything. I think Pitbull needs to stay in the dogshouse. Yuck.

However, to be entirely fair, I do like Adele. Let's hear it for the chubby thick chicks! I like Rolling in the Deep.

When I was a teenager my mother thought I had lost my mind and pop music had gone completely to hell and it should all be destroyed. [Remember, Mother called Aretha Franklin "that crazy rock singer!"]

I looked it up, and when I was 19, Kim Carnes' song Bette Davis Eyes was the #1 song that year. I remember loving that song. [I was probably one of the few people in my age group who had ever seen a Bette Davis movie...]

In my grandmother's day, when she was young and "courting" it was considered improper for a young lady to go out in public without a corset, or to flaunt her bare ankle. Now the standard is a lot looser - you can wear just about anything so long as your entire naked boob isn't showing. Part of the boob is considered OK, the entire boob, no.

If my grandmother had seen my daughter preparing to leave the house wearing a gauzy see-through black shirt and a black bra underneath, she would've either fainted dead away or pulled out her shotgun. I saw that sight last night and suggested, gently, that Alesia put on a different shirt. And hide from Granny until she had it on.

Michael likes to pull down his gym shorts and walk around with his butt hanging out [covered in boxers, of course - and only around the house.] If Mamaw had seen him do that, even just around the house, she would've either fainted or pulled out her shotgun.

My father once freaked out because he saw me sewing up a pair of undies in which the elastic had worked loose. A child of the Depression, he yelled he could AFFORD DRAWERS FOR HIS CHILDREN! [The offending undies were thrown away. I would think of the scene in later years when I first heard the euphemism "freak out."]

After seeing the strange dental-floss type of undies my daughter wears, I would be thrilled if I saw my daughter holding panties that consisted of more than 1 square inch of fabric.

My daughter doesn't comprehend that in our house right now there is NO extra money. She asked me yesterday if she would be getting a laptop for her birthday in a few weeks. I clenched my jaw shut to keep from saying "Kiddo, unless I suddenly develop the ability to pull a computer out of my butt, um NO." I simply looked at her and said "I am not working, Alesia. Where do you think I will get the money to buy you a laptop? I am wondering where we will get the money for FOOD."

She asked me yesterday why I don't go out with my friends more. I told her because going out with friends costs MONEY, and I don't have any at the moment. She looked at me like I was from Mars.

Michael has not been perfect lately either.

Michael likes the spray-on sunscreen, and I spray him down outside so we don't pollute the inside air. I was spraying him down this afternoon, preparing him for his daily broiling at the pool, and he started horsing around, making loud high-pitched whimpering noises. I told him to hush and he didn't. When we came in, Mother gave him the stinkeye and warned him never to make those noises again, in her sternest schoolteacher voice. He had upset Coco [who had thrown up on Mother's bed] and Mother was pissed off mightily.

Do all teenaged boys think it's funny to make weird noises ALL THE TIME?!

For the last week, Alesia has spent all her time either holed up in her room, working, or "hanging out" with her friends. She comes out occasionally to fix her hair or make herself a sandwich, and sometimes to do her chores - but only after I tell her 3 times. She prefers spending the night at the homes of her friends because their mothers don't have a horribly unreasonable midnight curfew. I am SO mean.

When I was 19 and living at home, if I had called or texted my mother at 11:45 at night and told her I would be spending the night elsewhere she would have FREAKED OUT. It's a common occurrence around here.

When I was young, an outfit like this would've only been seen on a hooker:

An outfit like this would've been a Halloween costume:

Has the entire WORLD GONE CRAZY? Or just Rihanna and Nicki Minaj?

I remember when Madonna was considered VERY risque and "out there." She looks like Grandma Moses now.

So let's brainstorm a minute.

What on earth do you think that teenagers are going to be listening to and/or wearing twenty-five years from now?!?

I don't know. I do know this. Mother will be in heaven laughing hysterically as I look aghast at my teenaged grandchildren and ponder whether or not to faint or grab a shotgun...

 

Babes in Suds

The ad below made me laugh out loud, so I had to share it. This is an actual ad on Craigslist. I changed all the pertinent information so this guy won't sue me. All I have to say is Wow, the vice squad needs to stake out this place. LOL

"I'm an up and starting carwash owner in Downtown Atlanta, the carwash is called XXXXXX, the building behind worlds famous XXXXXXX. I need attractive ladies to advertise, flyer, hold signs, wash and detail cars. To apply come to the XXXXXX between 10:30pm-7pm. Those applying may send their resume and/or pictures to XXXXX@XXXXX or to the company [cell xxxphone numberxxx]. Females only, I've hired all the males I needed. The first two ladies I had were killing in tips, because a lot of guys would try to impress them by leaving huge tips. However, after being in the sun for 2 weeks they started to slow down and tire, so please gut check yourself and if you won't be able to handle hard-work, please do not apply. I just lost them to a sugar daddy taking them from the wash and being there sponsor, so now I'm back needing to replace and reload."

I like the phrase "up and starting" - is that more active than someone who's just "up and coming"?

Sounds like the ladies he hired realized right quick that they can find "sponsors" right there at the car wash, if they detail more than the cars...?!?!

BTW, "replace and reload" is not an acceptable Human Resources term. The imagery is way too vivid.

Book Talk

Yesterday was a long and frustrating day, but in a good way. I spent a lot of time pondering what the cover of my new e-book should look like. Covers are so important. They are the first opportunity for an author to really make a connection with a readers, and unfortunately books are often judged simply by their covers.

I am not too bad of an artist, but the stuff I drew didn't really look professional, so I reluctantly scrapped my sketches.The professional artist the publisher hired has a lot of notes to read this morning, LOL. I hope she understands my ideas.

As soon as my book, The Warrior's Box, is available for download, I will post a link so those of you with e-readers can get your copy! Hopefully that will happen in the next few days.

Michael got a summer haircut yesterday. His hair is shorter now than it's been in a couple of years, but that's OK. He's going to the pool every day, so he wants a no-fuss haircut.

We learned some exciting news. Mike is going to scuba camp! Usually he goes to the Adventure Amputee Camp, but this year there's a second camp down in Florida for limb difference kids who want to learn scuba. He's a bit anxious about leaving me for a week, but I know he will have fun. Since we can't afford to take a vacation I am so glad he's getting this opportunity.

Since the baseball game Tuesday night was the last of the season, I sent Mike's baseball coach a note thanking him for his hard work with the boys. It was such a good experience for Michael, despite the fact they didn't win many games. The coach sent back the sweetest note, and here is some of what he said:

"It was my pleasure having Mike on my team. Not only did he give every effort, his sportsmanship and attitude were great. His smile is infectious. My approach is to find out early in the season if a player is coachable and Michael was always willing to learn and listen."

After "hanging out" with friends for two days, Alesia came home yesterday. She hadn't slept or eaten well, and she was pale and grumpy. I let her read the manuscript for my book, however, and she brightened up a good bit, surprisingly. She was able to talk about it at dinner and sound knowledgeable and articulate. The only critical thing she said was the story is "simple" and I pointed out it's a kids book, aimed at 13-15 year old girls. However, I want it to have some appeal to older readers, too. So far the grownups who have read it liked it and said it wasn't boring. That includes my mother, who doesn't read Harry Potter and all the juvenile fiction. If she thought it was a bore she'd tell me.

It's very exciting, all this book stuff, but today I must turn my attention back to finding gainful employment. I can't support myself simply by writing, not yet anyway.

I started reading the second book by my brother's friend Larry Correia, Monster Hunter Vendetta. So far, it's really good. It's purely entertaining, which is what I want right now. I just finished a book by Karen White, Learning to Breathe, and although it was well-written as always with her books, I need something less heavy any angsty... [is that a word?!]

Michael and I watched one of my all-time favorite movies yesterday, Chariots of Fire. It's a great story and it was filmed in England. I don't like most of the music, though. The cheesy electronic piano stuff just makes my skin crawl. I wish they'd re-issue it with a better soundtrack.

The heat is up into the upper 80's, and I am hoping we can get some badly-needed rain today.

The Eating Machine

Michael had his last baseball game of the season tonight, and he came home tired and hungry. I was at his game so there was no elaborate dinner, but we had a perfectly adequate light summer meal.

I make excellent tuna salad, with chopped eggs in it. We also had sliced tomatoes, cantaloupe slices, and chips. Mike ate a big helping of tuna salad [with hot sauce on it!], almost an entire tomato, about a cup of cantaloupe, and a large chocolate bar. I was cleaning up when I heard him say "I'm still hungry!" I opened the fridge and grabbed some leftover rice, probably about 1 1/2 cups, and heated that up. He ate it ALL.

I cannot fill him up these days. I pray he is growing...

We had a really busy day [for me]. I got up and watered all the plants and gardens, then made breakfast. Mother and Michael and I went to Kroger and came home. Alesia was at a friend's house.

Then at 3:30 I took Mike to the baseball field for photos. I had a job interview in midtown at 5. It was one of the fastest jobs ever, for an editor position at a marketing company. I don't think I go it, but I gave it my best shot.

Then I came home and changed clothes, and went to the baseball game.

I hate running around in this weather - it was 90 or so today. Sticky hot.

Now I am exhausted...

FUNNIES

These are questions and answers from the Old Hollywood Squares, and they are hilarious. Enjoy!

 

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.

Sweets

Mother always says I have a HUGE sweet tooth, and I know it's true, but today even I got overloaded with the sugar and had to stop.

Colton spent the night here last night and I wanted to fix a yummy breakfast, so I made french toast and sausage. I put syrup and butter on my french toast. When I was a kid I put butter and salt. Both ways are good. Michael puts enough syrup to sink a battleship. Colton ate his toast DRY. Yep, nothing on it. I hope he's not worrying about his weight too much. He's growing like a weed. He was a bit chubby when Michael first met him a couple of years ago but with better nutrition and more exercise he's slimmed down. He's up to about 5'7 already and weighs I think he said 126.

I know he can be a handfull - all boys can - but I am glad he feels at home here. He gives good hugs and he's always polite and sweet and helpful. I think teenagers need a home where they can find refuge, away from their own parents.

Colton and Mike a couple of weeks ago.

I had to run to Kroger late this morning and pick up provisions for the next couple of days. I didn't want to buy what we call Big Groceries, because that takes time, and I was rushing to make it to church before 1:30. If I am by myself I can buzz in and out and get just a few things very quickly.

We are in the hot weather now, so I refuse to go to the grocery store after noon. It's just too muggy hot then.

While I was at Kroger I saw a smallish man in his 30's pushing a buggy like he knew what he was doing. He was sorta attractive and I of course checked for a wedding ring. Negative. I went around to the next aisle and looked for bread. He followed and I noticed him again. I glanced into his buggy and almost laughed out loud. He had about 15 bottles of Powerade, and probably 20 Lean Cuisines, and a bunch of bananas. I bet he tells his mama he eats "healthy" because he had that one pitiful bunch of bananas. I wanted to say to him, Dude, you need to either learn how to cook or marry somebody who can cook because day-um, your food choices just suck.

I should've shown him my brussels sprouts and shared that if you roast those little baby cabbages just right they are mondo tasty and nutritious. I also had lean turkey, bread, and V-8 juice. We're not health fanatics but we eat fairly decently.

We usually only have sandwich night about once a week. Sometimes, instead of that we have Fallout night - whatever leftovers fall out of the fridge, that's what we eat.

Alesia went with me to the High Tea at church this afternoon and it was fun. There was a TON of food there. Lots of little sandwiches and tiny bite-sized sweets. We got 4 dozen pastry cups filled with curried chicken salad in about 10 minutes, and then made tea sandwiches with the rest of the chicken salad. The pound cake was sliced up. Alesia was looking longingly at all the piles of food, and kept saying "I'm REALLY hungry..."

"As soon as it's 2:00 you can eat," I said cheerfully.

I was sort of amazed Alesia had agreed to go to the tea with me. Mother talked her into it. We hadn't done any sort of Mother/Daughter things in a while, with all that's been going on in the last few weeks.

We sat with a friend of mine who has two adopted daughters and let me tell you, teeaged girls can EAT - especialy when there are no guys around. There were a lot of women, lots of babies, and many older ladies of Mom's generation. The tea was poured by servers who were all older men in suits, and they were very courtly and cute. Mother missed a prime opportunity to flirt with guys in her age group...

The goodies were all delectable but I was sort of amused because it was clear some of them were from a bakery and some were homemade. The bakery ones were fine, but not as good as hoemade, IMHO.

The tea also included a Silent Auction of donated small items, and a raffle. I won a small gift basket with a 4th of July theme, which is ironic since that's my birthday. I bid on a small necklace in the Silent Auction and won it, although I was sorry I didn't win the Hummingbird teapot I bid on. I collect teapots and I love hummingbirds.

I got a lot of compliments on my curried chicken salad.

I got totally sick of sweets after I tucked into the little cookies and brownie bites and tea cakes and everything else.

The high today was 90 - we're back to summer. One thing about it, I sweat so much on days like today I don't worry about water retention.

I'm hoping to make tomorrow a real rest day, unlike most Sundays...

Gardening, Cooking, Writing

There are three things I really enjoy in life [gardening, cooking, and writing], and I got to do them all today, which made it a good day, even though there was some sadness, too. That's just life, right? The bitter and the sweet.

Early this morning, I watered everything in the gardens and was delighted to note how well my flowering plants are doing in the front yard. After Michael planted my new little rose bushes for me I was afraid they wouldn't make it, but I fertilized them and I am still watering daily, and they are coming back. The yellow one even has some small blooms on it. I have some blossoms on my side garden tomato plants and that is thrilling to me. I hope I can harvest enough tomatoes to make some marinara sauce and freeze it this summer. The one yard thing I hate to do is pull weeds. I decided a few weeks ago I would pull a few weeds each day and not try to do them all at once in any one particular area. It workes better that way and it's easier on my back.

After Mother finished breakfast and Alesia got the kitchen cleaned up, I made my pound cake and put that in the oven, in three loaf pans, then I made Ina's curried chicken salad recipe. Now, I don't much like chicken salad, but that is GOOD. I used dried cranberries instead of raisins. Mother helped me a bit and said even she liked it, and she really doesn't care for curried stuff. The revelation to me was that the fat bone-in skin-on chicken breasts I got at Publix turned out so delicious. All I did was rub them with olive oil, salt and pepper, and bake them on 350 for about 40 minutes. They were moist and delicious. I had to have a couple of bites that didn't make it into the salad, I have to admit. So, so good.

When it's so easy to make something so tasty, why don't more people cook?! I will never understand that.

Two of the three pound cake loaves came out really well. The third one, the bottom got a tiny bit too done, so I saved that for us to eat. I am taking the good loaves to church tomorrow afternoon for the High Tea.

I spent part of the afternoon composing the cover blurb for my new book, The Warrior's Box. That was an interesting exercise. Trying to condense the story into a few sentences wasn't easy. I enjoy even mundane writing tasks like that, though. It's like solving a puzzle.

Not everything today was pleasant, unfortunately.

I had to turn down a job interview today, for a website writer. I didn't realize when I sent off a resume what sort of website it really was - it's for an infertility clinic. I looked through the entire website after I was sent an email today and I thought, this is awful. Nowhere on the site was adoption mentioned as an option for infertile couples. Lots of photos of parents with cute babies. No photos of heartbroken people unable to conceive and scared to adopt. I've never dealt with infertility, but I know a lot of couples who have gone through that heartbreak, including my own brother and his wife. Urging people to pour thousands and thousands of dollars into treatments that have only 5-10% chance of success makes me angry. There are SO MANY babies and toddlers in foster homes and orphanages around the world who need parents. All the infertile couples I know who turned to adoption were happy with their outcomes. A child is a child, and every child needs love and care, and when you're looking into the eyes of your child, biology just really does not matter, even if that child has brown eyes and you have blue ones.

I am trying to help my friend Alla at Adoption Ark find an adoptive family for a 6 year old boy in Bulgaria who is missing both hands, a congenital limb difference. Most people won't even consider the boy, but let me tell you something - with decent prosthetics and some physical therapy I am sure he can lead a totally normal, productive life. Doesn't he deserve a loving mama and daddy?

As most of you know that read this blog, even casually, my daughter Alesia was adopted from Khabarovsk, Russia, in 2004. One of my fellow single moms in my Yahoo group for Russian adoptive moms shared a link about her recent visit back to Russia with her now teenaged daughter, to find the child's birthplace. I read the entire account of the visit, In Search of Krivuha, and wanted to cry. I could envision making a similar journey with Alesia one day. The little village looks a lot like the village Alesia is from, and it even resembles the poorer section of Khabarovsk. The houses look to be 100 years old, and there are huge potholes and garbage everywhere. This is not Moscow or St. Petersburg. Krivuha bears a much closer resemblance to the real Russia, the non-tourist places. The poverty is impossible to imagine if you haven't been there.

There's also great beauty though. Russia is a land of harsh contrasts.

This is Alesia the day I took her out of the orphanage, on the banks of the Amur River.