The Crab Chronicles

They Grow Up TOO Fast!

It's a beautiful sunshiny day but very windy. I made Michael a To Do list and he has already done a lot of it, plus helped me with making a loaf of Banana Bread.

If I have bananas that have turned black it's very difficult to NOT make banana bread. I feel guilty for throwing out food.

Yesterday was not particularly noteworthy except for me behaving badly and feeling really disgusted with myself afterward. I am still having to adjust to the fact that Michael has a car and can drive himself places. He likes to drive around and go see friends.

He was babysitting all morning yesterday, and then we ran a couple of errands. He got a haircut. We decided to bum around Dollar General. He thought this toy was funny:

We went to Home Depot to buy a new trash can with a lid but the cans they had were all too pricey. Then we came home.

Around 4:30 he said he wanted to go over to his friend Kevin's house. I just lost it. 'WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GO OVER THERE?! WE HAVE A NICE HOUSE! I NEVER SEE YOU ANY MORE!" I screamed like a complete ninny.

I got so agitated I could feel my blood pressure creeping up. So I decided to lie down and listen to music.

I realized within about 5 minutes that I was being a completely unfair, clingy, ridiculous mama. I was doing something I had thought I was too mature and reasonable to ever do. I was stirring up

MAMA DRAMA

AAAAAAARGH!

Yes, I was a total beeyotch, for no good reason. Michael is a good kid. He had done what I'd asked him to do. He's a good driver. I just wanted him to hang out with ME.

How many 17 year old boys want to spend Saturday night hanging out with mama?!

I texted him an apology.

The bottom line is simply this: I want my little boy back. I am not ready for him to be so grown up. I didn't get finished with my little cutie pie. He may be shaving and driving and taller than me but when I look at him this is who I see:

I know I am not going to get any sympathy from most of my peers who have kids in college or older, but I would give anything to have just one afternoon with my little guy.

Of course, I'd give anything to have an afternoon with my dad, or one of my grandparents, or any number of people who have passed away.

We can't do that. I can't do that.

I need to stop looking at the young man and mourning the little boy. I need to just make sure he has the tools to be a happy guy and a good father, when the time comes.

Michael has such a loving nature, I don't worry about it.

I have a video on my Desktop that I watch occasionally. It's not very long. It shows Michael doing a funny little dance, and Alesia is in there, too. I love to see my kids when they were younger.

Thanks be to God for videos, to supplement our memories.

I'm sure when my mom looks at me and Bruce she sees something like this:

Bullet Points

In the yawning time suck that is Facebook, I occasionally see links to online tabloids and they inevitably have stories like "10 Funniest Sitcom Moments" and "20 Famous Ex-Models Turned Actresses" etc. There is always a list.

Society has now become obsessed with lists. With bullet points. It's scary.

One list article I am embarrassed to say I actually read was something like "10 Stars With Ugly Spouses." I was appalled. Who were these people to say someone was ugly? Really? When Hollyweird tries to tell us some size -2 15 year old is the beauty ideal for all females? When Hollywood men have no body hair? When a woman bigger than a size 4 is considered "voluptuous"? I remember years ago when Jennifer Lopez first became famous she was described as a "voluptuous" size 6. Ugh.

Hollyweird's worst sin is that they present a false and horrifying standard of beauty and so many women [and men, sometimes] feel like they have to live up to it. It's ridiculous.

I digressed for a minute. Sorry.

The title of this post is Bullet Points because our entire society has been reduced to Top 10 lists and articles about the 10 Best/Worst this or that.

I think that has happened because with the proliferation of videogames we all have the attention spans of gnats. We are losing the art of being able to think critically and conceptually.

I was told by a recruiter recently that nobody wants to read sentences on a resume any more; it's all about the bullet points.

So actual sentences are considered old-fashioned.

Cursive writing is a quaint artifact.

I mourn the loss of education and a beautifully written document. I hate that the entire world is now being reduced to bullet points.

It's like the language of texting. R u K? OMG! Srsly? ROFLMAO!

One day in the future there will be people majoring in the ancient language of 21st century texts. I will be in my grave flipping around, not ROFL in heaven...

I am as guilty as anyone else. I get caught up in the electronic world. I want to reduce everything to bullet points. Everything goes by quickly. Too quickly. Sometimes I consciously make myself put down the phone and just walk outside with Lola and stand there for a little while, listening to the sounds of birds and the wind, not hearing anything electronic, not rushing around to DO or Google or Tweet.

I try to have some quiet time each day to just listen to music, and daydream. Hey, it's as close as I can get to meditation without falling asleep...

All this is to say that bullet points seem to be a tiny ladder down into a pit of de-humanizing triviality.  They aren't real writing. They are quick, cheap, easy substitutes for real writing.

What happened to actual writing ability?!

I went to what I thought was an interview the other day, and it turned out I was only there to take a pre-interview test. I was asked to draft a Complaint, only using a demand letter. Well, I usually have a "go-by" Complaint that I alter to fit the facts, but I gamely drafted a Complaint based on the facts in the letter. The receptionist came in after 20 minutes and exclaimed "Wow, you really nailed that! There's the style of the case, and the parties, and numbered paragraphs!"

Now, for those of you not legal professionals, let me explain. A Complaint is the way you start a lawsuit. There's a standard format, rules that must be followed to make it correct. This is what you pay lawyers to do, write a proper complaint, although paralegals often draft them. It's a basic skill, something you learn early on. I've written a few Complaints in my life, but responded to thousands simply because I usually work for defense lawyers. I know the basics of how to draft the document, though. I was taken aback that there are individuals who represent themselves as experienced litigation paralegals on the plaintiff's side who cannot draft a basic complaint.

That's like applying for a job as a house painter and showing up with a Paint By Numbers kit.

Just an example of a society filled with people who think it's OK to lie on a resume. People who cannot write lie about that too, I'm sure. No wonder I have to take tests to prove I'm not lying. But how SAD.

I blame it on the proliferation of bullet points.

• the road
• to hell
• is filled
• with bullet
• points...

photo by Mark Embry

Time Travel Movies

Michael and I watched a film called About Time and really enjoyed it. The writer and director, Richard Curtis, wrote Love Actually and Notting Hill, and he's got a lot of credibility in England. I liked both those films but they are pretty fluffy rom coms, not breaking any new ground.

About Time isn't Shakespeare but it's got some interesting ideas, ones that made me pause.

If you could travel back in time to any point in your life and relive it, where would you travel back to and why?

That's the basic premise of the film.

The lead actor, Domhnall Gleeson looked so familiar but I couldn't figure out why. His IMDB profile said he played one of the Weasley twins in the Harry Potter movies. Ah, right. He's not really handsome, but he's eminently watchable, and he has a very expressive face.

About a week ago, Michael and I watched a film I had heard a lot about, The Butterfly Effect. It's also about time travel, but it's a horror film, basically, and pretty disturbing. I didn't care for it.

Of course, my favorite time travel movie is Somewhere in Time. It's not scientific and logical, it's just romantic and dreamy. I still have a soft spot in my heart for it. It was made in 1980, before Domnhall Gleeson was born!!

AAARGH! I am older than dirt.

I love movies about time travel, even Back to the Future.

Anyway, that's about all I have to report. More later.

 

 

Reporting on Michael

I sent off Michael's last post placement report today, to the adoption folks in Kazakhstan. I usually don't include a letter but since this is the last one, I decided to include a letter and a couple of extra photos.

There is a perception in Asian countries that handicapped people are to be shunned, or kept away from public view, that they are "bad luck." That's why so many handicapped kids wind up in orphanages. Schools and workplaces don't want handicapped workers. They are to be given a begging bowl and a government subsistence check. That's why it was so important to the ladies in Mike's orphanage to get him out of the country, and into an American home. He is so bright, and such a good kid.

[BTW, I hope and pray the attitudes towards handicapped people in Asian countries will change, and are changing...]

With that cultural bias in mind, and the bias towards adopted kids, it was important to me to let the adoption folks know that like so many other limb different people, my son is talented and active and awesome.

Dear Kazakhstan Adoption Authorities:

Please find enclosed the final post placement report of my son Michael Robert Thompson. He will be 18 in a few months. As you can see from the report, Michael is doing very well.  He is a good boy and makes good grades in school.  He has many friends. He loves sports. He loves games and music.

He helps me with small jobs at home. He babysits other kids, boys adopted from Russia.

Michael has his own car, and he paid for it by working last summer. He will be a lifeguard this summer at the pool in our neighborhood after he passes his lifeguard certification tests.

In a couple of years Michael will go to college. He will probably become a teacher. His hand doesn’t matter. In America, employers hire based on a person’s abilities, and handicapped people are hired every day.

I am very proud of my son and what a fine young man he is today.

There are many orphans in Kazkhstan like Michael. They may have a missing hand, or another kind of disability. They may be blind or deaf. There are Americans who would still adopt them.  Americans will adopt older kids, too.

In America, being adopted is not hidden. It’s not a secret, or shameful. Adopted children are like all children. They want a decent home, and parents to love them.

Please make it easier for children like Michael to be adopted.

Dee Thompson

above and below, my little guy

above - Mike water skis, snow skis, goes to dances, drives his own car - what a long way he has come, and what a bright future he has ahead!

 

Broken Angels and Peanut Butter Pie

Another beautiful day yesterday, after a chilly morning. The only thing that marred it was my neighbor who got a new driveway yesterday. The big truck arrived at 7 a.m. as I had Lola outside on the leash. It was a little scary seeing the big trucks going down the street, until I realized why.

Lotsa noise. Most of the day.

Michael got home from school in a somewhat foul humor because he didn't get enough sleep Sunday night. Then he told me he found some superglue at school but it didn't work.

"It didn't even hold paper together!"

I had him glue back two angels from our collection that had gotten broken. I was in the kitchen cleaning while he sat at the breakfast nook table working on it. "This glue is crap! Doesn't work!" he said in disgust.

"How will you know whether or not it works when you keep pulling the things apart?!" I said. "No glue sets up that fast. Give it a couple of hours."

Ah, the impatience of the young.

It only occurred to me later that in the movies, the glue sets incredibly fast. Of course that's not how it works in real life. What a shock.

He finally went outside to do his longboard. I walked out with Lola just in time to see William -- our 5 year old across the street neighbor who ADORES Michael -- come running out the front door of his house yelling "MICHAEL MY MOM SAID I COULD GO WITH YOU!! WAIT!!"

So Michael patiently went with William down the street to the pool, and stayed with him. William played on the children's playground. Then Michael escorted him home. He is William's de facto big brother. It's so cute.

Made a peanut butter pie yesterday. Decided to make my own crust. Piecrust is so easy! Took me years to not be intimidated by the process. However, sometimes I am so dense. I was pushing and pulling the dough to fit the pie pan and it only occurred to me later, duh, why didn't I use a rolling pin and roll it out?!

It's bad to be absent-minded.

I wondered if Michael would eat it since he's not a huge fan of peanut butter. He ate two HUGE pieces. Mother said it needed chocolate.

Well, yes, but YOU were the one who didn't want me using up the Oreos...

Below, some of the angels in our collection, from a few years ago. None were expensive, but we just like angels...

Be Thou My Vision

Incredibly lovely day, with temps in the 60's and a good breeze. I took every opportunity possible to get outside and walk around. Rain was predicted, but we didn't get any.

Michael went to Walmart and bought grass seed. We still have bare spots in the front yard from where the water department tore up my yard last fall. Mike was perplexed by me telling him to just scatter the seed like chicken feed. He likes to study on things and plan them out, and be very meticulous. My way of doing things around the house is to just throw them together, willy nilly. Usually things work out OK.

We cleaned out the coat closet, and took a huge box of stuff up to Goodwill. There were coats in the closet that never got worn, so why not give them to folks who need them during our 2 months of "winter"?! [I put it in quotes because people up North think we don't have winter.LOL]

While we were at the Goodwill dropoff place, Lola got a packet of green bean seeds from the table and tore them open and played with them. She has an amazing capacity to play. She played with a banana the other day, and half a lemon.

Mom gave her a bite of dill pickle at lunch and she ate it!

I made "potato salad" to have with dinner - we also had Honeybaked Ham and a green salad. I don't like potato salad so I leave out what most folks put in there - onions, peppers, pickles. I just cut up and boil my potatoes, drain them, and toss in some mayo, onion and garlic powders, salt and pepper.Michael had a huge helping.

Was working at my desk and found a lovely version of one of my favorite hymns, Be Though My Vision. This is the video I like. Feel free to sing along.

 

Cucumber Soup

Very seldom do I stray way outside my comfort zone in the cooking area, but today I did just that, trying to re-create a soup Michael loved in Kazakhstan, Okroshka. Cold vegetable soup with dill and cucumber.

I looked at a recipe and decided to reject some of the ingredients - olive oil and mint leaves, to be exact. That would've been a cure for constipation.

No, my soup has about 5 cucumbers, about a cup of sour cream and a cup of plain yogurt, lemon juice, and LOTS of dill, garlic powder, sea salt, pepper, and onion powder. I love my immersion blender.

Below is a not great photo of the final result. I was trying to use the foil as a backdrop; I know, I know, it looks stupid. So be it.

It was a day for errands and grocery shopping, and by late afternoon I was bored.

Michael went to the movie tonight with a friend and when he got back I said "I made you some soup, try it." He sat down and looked at the small bowl of soup and just grinned. "Green soup, Mom?!" he joked. "It's cucumber soup. I think you'll like it."

He ate the small bowl, pronounced it good, and disappeared upstairs for a while.

Yeah, don't try that "Oh, I'll eat something at the movie Mom" crap with me, Mr. Popcorn for Dinner. Have a VEGETABLE, son.

Right before bed I asked him if he liked the soup, and did it remind him of Okroshka.

"Well, sort of. Except there was no ham or eggs," was his reply.

"HAM and EGGS?!" I said. I just recall a cold veggie soup with lots of onion and dill. I didn't eat it. Don't recall seeing ham or eggs. He loved that soup in Kazakhstan.

"Yeah, but not a big deal. It was good," he said diplomatically.

"Good," I said, "because you've got a lot of soup to eat!"

Lola is a Star

I decided it was time Lola had her own Facebook page. Why not? She is the most loving and entertaining person in our house, most of the time.

Even when she eats an entire carton of sour cream, like she did this morning. Even yesterday, when she ate half a package of English muffins. Even yesterday afternoon, when she tried to snatch a cookie out of my hand.

Love her lots!

Here is a link to her page: Lola's Facebook Page. I hope if you are on Facebook you will go on there and Like her page.

I will post updates fairly often, just for fun.

We got Lola last November, from the Bassett Hound Rescue of Georgia, a wonderful organization.

Hiding Vegetables

Yesterday was a super busy day and today promises more of the same, but I wanted to post something so everyone will know I didn't fall off the edge of the planet.

I am now guilty of hiding vegetables, and I don't care what anyone thinks.

Yesterday morning I made spaghetti sauce with a little eggplant. I took a small eggplant and peeled it and took out the seeds. I am a small seed hater, as you know. I then chopped it into pieces and tossed the pieces with some olive oil and sea salt. I roasted it at 400 for 20 minutes. While that was happening, I chopped up an entire red onion and cooked it in some canola oil. I put a jar of Classico in the crock pot, and added the softened onions and eggplant, then hit the mixture with an immersion blender. I added the juice of half a lemon and about 2 tablespoons of minced garlic, and a lb. of ground beef, browned. Oh, and about 2 tablespoons extra of Italian seasoning and a cup of red wine.

I shared some with my friend Kristy, and she enjoyed it.

Michael ate a big portion. Then about an hour later, while we were watching a movie, he ate another big portion. SCORE.

I confessed what I had done with the eggplant to Mike and Mom as we were eating. Mom was delighted. She loves eggplant. Mike just shrugged, like whatever.

**********************

Michael's glasses needed a quick repair yesterday, the nose piece having fallen off, and after school he headed over to VisionWorks. He called me when he was done, and while we were on the phone, he accidentally backed into another car.

I asked him why he did that and he said he just forgot to look. That parking area is a real squeeze, too. I didn't handle it well. It freaked me out. I told Michael to get the other guy's name and insurance information, and he was too nervous. The other driver was Indian and barely spoke English, and had his entire family in the car. He told Michael he didn't have his insurance information. 

Michael came home with only a tiny slip of paper the cop gave him, which had the report number and instructions to get the police report off a website called BUYCRASH.COM. Huh?! Never heard of that before. So today I have to call State Farm and report it. Dread that call, even though everyone in the agent's office is really nice.

*************************

In other news... I applied for two jobs yesterday which I really really would love to have. I won't reveal more, but suffice to say I spent a LONG time on the cover letters. I always wonder if the folks really read those letters, or if they just skim them and skip right to the resume. Ah well... I need a job with more hours and/or better pay, so please pray for me.

That's all the news for now...

The Blessing of St. Patrick

Yesterday was St. Patricks's Day, and in my house that means it gets celebrated. Some of our ancestors were Irish - and English, Scot, Lord knows what else - but that's not the only reason it's a major day around here.

My parents were introduced to each other at a party on St. Patrick's Day 1956. Less than a year later, in February 1957, they were married, at the old First Baptist Church in Atlanta.

When I was a kid, St. Patrick's Day meant we were having corned beef and cabbage for dinner.

I HATED corned beef. Hated it with a passion. Hated even the smell of it. Wrote a poem about how much I hated it, which was published in the team newspaper I edited. The first line went something like: "I don't like corned beef / Indeed I do not / I think it is comparable to pig slops that have rot..."

Sadly, the rest of the poem is lost in time, a literary masterpiece that didn't survive one of the many moves...

I must also note, I now like corned beef, cooked the way we like it, in a crock pot with a lot of wine and garlic.

My mother is an excellent cook. However, boiled cabbage and corned beef were my least favorite things she cooked. On those nights I only ate what I had to, to survive, and if there was cornbread that was the main meal for me. (She has always made wonderful cornbread, even before discovering Lewis Grizzrd's mama's cornbread, which includes mayonnaise...)

Last night's dinner was the new St. Pat's Day dinner. After reading a bunch of recipes for Irish food online, I decided to just fix what we like, and not worry too much about authenticity.

I found some beautiful pieces of salmon at Publix, and poached them in a mixture of white wine, water, fresh lemon juice, and dill. I also made a sauce which was delectable - mayo, fresh lemon juice, and dill. Yes, it's the flavors are a little repetetive, but the sauce was wonderful.

I also had Michael run to the store and buy a bag of real potatoes. Not pre-made mashed potatoes. Nope. I peeled and diced them, boiled them, and added a lot of butter and sour cream, and some garlic salt. I must also point out that the potato has always been a staple of Irish cuisine.

For the green, we had roasted asparagus, and a lemon pie. It's the lemon pie made with a can of condensed milk and fresh lemon juice and egg yolks. I added a drop of green food coloring - which initially horrified Michael until I explained that food coloring has no taste. He ate two pieces..

So our dinner wasn't the usual, and the potatoes were a bit of trouble, but everything was really good, and I got a lot of compliments from Mom and Michael. Well, Mike wasn't effusive, but watching him eat with great gusto, big portions... that told me all I needed to know.

Because Elva and Tony met on St. Patrick's Day 1956, they got married and started procreating, and I came along in 1962. I adopted Michael in 2007and we added Lola to the family in 2013. So we all owe our little family to St. Patrick...