I am reading a little book called When God Winks: How the Power of Coincidence Guides Your Life, and it has a lot of interesting stories in it. Much food for thought.
The basic premise of the book is that there are no coincidences in life. When things happen, even seemingly rendom or meaningless things, there is always a reason. The author says the "God winks" are there to remind us that God is in control, and he's watching out for us. I totally agree with that.
Ten years ago, my mother and I were searching and searching for a house here in Atlanta that we could share. I had just adopted my daughter. Mom had decided to downsize and move closer to me. Sharing seemed to be a good idea, for us both.
We looked at a lot of houses, but none really fit the bill. Finding one with a big enough bedroom and bathroom on the first floor was really tough. Then I got a call from the real estate agent one day and his first words were "I am standing in the family room of your house."
I thought that was a bit presumptuous, but I didn't want to contradict him. [I later realized he was meant to find us our home - his ex stepmom married my cousin.]
Then I learned some really interesting things. The house is on Leslie Drive. My best friend's name is Lesleigh - different spellings but same name. It's near Henderson Mill Road. My father's mother was a Henderson. It's very close to Embry Hills Shopping Center. One of my dad's closest friends is his cousin Doug Embry, and Doug's sons are now friends of mine. Even the house number is a God wink - it contains the year of my birth. It has been a great house, and we have terrific neighbors and good schools nearby.
There are a number of God winks associated with my adoptions. Both my children were born in the same month as me, July. We are all the astrological sign of Cancer, thus the name of this blog, The Crab Chronicles.
My daughter's adoption hearing was scheduled for November 14th, my father's birthday. My son's adoption hearing was on April 3rd, the same day as my grandparents' wedding anniversary. I had no influence on the dates of those hearings.
My son's God Winks are even more interesting. The first photo I ever saw of him, I was struck by his resemblance to my brother. He was born the same month my father died.
His Russian name was "Igor" which I knew would get him teased, so I asked him to choose an American name for himself. I gave him a list of names we liked. He chose Michael as his first name. It's also the name of my cousin's son. He chose Robert for his middle name - I have a grandfather, 2 uncles, and 2 cousins all named Robert. His birthday is July 19th, the same day as my uncle Bobby Hasty Jr.
Like his great uncle, Michael loves cars, and the beach, and he's a terrific athlete. [below, Michael and Uncle Bobby, 2007]
Likewise, my daughter reminds me a lot of my father. Despite the lack of a biological tie, Alesia is much like her grandfather Tony. She has green eyes. She is energetic. She loves animals. When she's happy she likes to snap her fingers. She likes to cook but doesn't like to be told how to cook. She loves music. She loves green beans. Dad was a bit wild in his younger years, before he settled down with Mom. Alesia has been sowing some wild oats the past few years, but she is settling down now, thanks be to God.
These are all God Winks, I believe.
Alesia and Michael were meant to be my children. I was meant to be their mom. We were family long before we met.
My actual birth had some God Winks. After a really difficult pregnancy, Mom happened to be at a party at the home of her doctor when she went into hard labor with me, and he was able to get her to the hospital and save my life by unwrapping the cord from around my neck. I was born on July 4th, a national holiday - just like my mother, who was born on New Year's Eve, a national holiday. Mom was a third child. I was a third child [Mom lost a baby before my brother was born.]
Lots of God Winks.
God is always sending me messages of reassurance, symbols of hope.
God Winks happen all the time. Whenever I've been stressed out in the past year or so, I've almost instantly noticed a red cardinal. To me, cardinals symbolize hope. It's like God's saying hang in there, Dee. It will all work out. As a person of faith, I have to believe that, but the extra assurance helps.
Sometimes there is no cardinal around, but I see a rainbow -- another symbol of hope. Years ago, I was so stressed out one day I was walking with my head down and I saw a rainbow in a mud puddle. Another time I had just broken up with a guy and I saw a gorgeous rainbow, and realized it was for the best.
A skeptic will say, of course, that all of these things are just coincidence. I feel differently. I feel strongly that people who move through life looking for hope and faith, praying and trying to live right and rely on the power of the Almighty - we are folks who get a precious gift, Grace.
The older I get, the more I realize that anxiety and fear are toxic. It's gotten much easier, with the passage of years, for me to not get freaked out by seemingly random negative things. It takes practice. I used to be truly uptight when I was younger. God has proven to me over and over, however, that having faith is the best way to cope with any sort of adversity.
My advice to you is simply this: pay attention to the God winks in your life. Take comfort from them.
