You remember Hot Wheels? My brother got Hot Wheels when I was about 5 or 6 and I was SO jealous. I wanted my own Hot Wheels. I wanted to make the cars do loop-de-loops. That image is the perfect metaphor for how my mind works. I am always thinking ahead, always plotting and planning and trying to be super prepared.
I suppose that's an inevitable result of getting my master's degree while working 30 hours a week for several years - there really weren't enough hours in the day, so every hour had to do my bidding and be productive. My social life suffered but I stayed out of trouble.
My parents have always laughingly said my motto as a child was "I'd RATHER do it MYSELF." I preferred to be independent and competent.
I didn't look like I was all that swift.
The image below is me after Mom dressed me up and combed my hair. More typically, I looked homeless. I rarely wore shoes, except to school and church. I liked to wear my brother's old clothes, or Dad's old undershirts. I was simply too preoccupied with playing and planning to worry about appearances.
I am still pretty much that way.
I realized yesterday that I went to the store and completely forgot to wear a bra. There was a lot on my mind. Fortunately, I didn't see anyone I knew. I was in and out in 5 minutes.
I was reading my friend Sarah's blog and she linked to this article. It stopped me in my tracks. The beautiful simplicity of it floors me.
I need to concentrate more on just DOING whatever task I'm doing, and stop trying to multitask. I'm better if I focus on one thing at a time.
This Monday is my 54th birthday. Not happy or excited about it; just resigned. Birthdays stopped being exciting years ago. They are just markers that another year has passed.
My resolution is to stop being in a tizzy and to start being more deliberate. It will take some work. I'm not built for quiet zen-like reflection.
Then again, I want to prove that an old dog CAN learn new tricks...
