Social media blew up the other day because of the ugly remarks made by a French author named Yann Moix, who said 50 year old women were invisible to him and he was only interested in women much younger -- Asian women, particularly. From Wikipedia:
In an interview with the French edition of the women's magazine Marie Claire, Moix declared that women in their 50s were “invisible” to him and that he preferred "younger women's bodies." He further added that he preferred dating Asian women, particularly Koreans, Chinese and Japanese.
When I saw a post on Facebook about his remarks I was really angry and disgusted, but now I've had some time to reflect on what he said, I have a few additional thoughts.
I should add that when I started doing research for this blog I came across even more ridiculous things Moix has spouted:
'White western women tire me, they wear me out,' he said. 'They make my hair stand on end. I cannot stand them.
Moix was criticised for being ageist, misogynistic and anti-feminist following his original comments, which were published in the French edition of Marie Claire.
As an unmarried woman over 50 I can safely say: smart move, Moix.
He isn't an idiot. He's brilliant. He has angered probably every non-Asian woman in the world who has a working brain, but he is very clever. He has gotten scads of international publicity. He is an author and filmmaker and I am pretty well-versed in both those worlds but I had never heard of him.
I think his remarks are idiotic, misogynistic rubbish, but it doesn't matter what I think. I am an over 50 white woman and he has no use for me or my opinions. The author Tracy Clark-Flory came close to expressing how I feel in this article in Jezebel magazine but the article felt unfinished.
Moix is courting controversy and drumming up publicity, but I think he's also sincere. I suspect that many men feel exactly the way Moix feels, but they have enough sense not to verbalize those feelings. Moix has apparently never been married and has no children. So he exists in an extended male adolescence. He is immature and shallow. He gets exactly what he deserves -- a life of treating women like objects, not human beings.
There are probably men all over the world secretly applauding him for his opinions. I don't care.
Here's the greatest gift that's part of being a woman over age 50: we don't have to spend vast amounts of time worrying about what men think about us.
In fact, I don't spend ANY time worrying about what any man thinks of me. Gone are the days when I would plan every outfit, worry about accessorizing, fret over my hair and makeup, and eternally try to be lovely and witty and charming to men.
I realized after I adopted my kids that I didn't have time for that kind of thing and I quit worrying. I cut my hair and quit wearing makeup. I wear mostly black pants and colorful tops and sensible shoes. I don't care what anyone thinks about me, male or female. I am at home in my own skin, and life is much happier and richer.
My mom and I have an ongoing debate about this subject, whether or not older women should wear makeup. I say no. Mom disagrees.. Most days, Mom dresses carefully and wears necklaces and lipstick and perfume. Her hands shake so she doesn't wear full face makeup or eye makeup any more, but she loves her lipstick. It makes her feel good. I encourage her to wear anything that promotes her happiness.
Wearing lipstick and/or makeup doesn't cheer me up. In fact, it stresses me out -- I keep thinking, is my mascara running? Is there lipstick on my teeth? Should I put hairspray on my hair?
And on and on.
I have a much richer life now that I don't waste so much time worrying about other people's opinions of me. I am a short, fat, gray-haired lady who is very opinionated and I make no apologies for it. I am who I am, and I am comfortable with me. My friends would tell you I am very smart, funny, and compassionate.
I don't care what idiots like Yann Moix think of me.
Back to my original premise.
Moix got a lot of backlash about his remarks and I'd bet he was delighted. He doesn't care what any white women of any age thinks, and he has no use for any woman over 50. Karma will have a lot of fun with him. What about the next time he tries to buy a house and the seller is a woman over 50? What about any female relatives he has who are over 50? I bet they will give him an earful at the next family gathering. If he ever has to do business with a woman over 50 and she Googles him, she will most likely go into that meeting thinking what an asshole! He has made a huge number of enemies. Stuff stays on the internet a long time, Yann, and you reap what you sow.
I'm enjoying just thinking about that...
BTW -- I studied French for two years. In French the word for me is moi -- add an X and you have MOIX - what an ego! LOL
