Shortly before I brought my daughter home from Russia in 2004 I started a group for parents of children adopted from Russia and Eastern Europe. The best support I got through the adoption process was from other parents. Like veterans, we were part of a unique group and only folks going through an international adoption could really understand the process.
I met a couple of ladies who were gay, and in the process of adopting two babies from Russia. The babies were medically fragile and desperately in need of medical care not available to them in their orphanages. I don't remember their specific issues. One of the ladies adopted both children. Her longtime partner went with her and attested they were "friends." They couldn't admit to more because if they had, the Russian government wouldn't have allowed the adoption to go forward. The government would rather have let those two children die than be adopted by a gay couple. I was thoroughly disgusted by that stance, but not really surprised.
Now, I read that our own government is allowing faith-based adoption agencies to discriminate against gay couples and still get federal dollars.
Pence Praises Rule That Would Let Adoption Agencies Exclude Gay Parents
This is utterly horrifying. Federal dollars -- our tax dollars -- are going to agencies who think it's just fine that religious organizations condemn gay parents and won't work with them.
I know what it feels like to face discrimination. When I was adopting my daughter I heard great things about a local adoption agency and I called them up, only to be told that because I was single they wouldn't work with me. This so-called "Christian" organization refused to work with single moms or dads -- despite the fact that I am not gay. Didn't matter to them. They thought it was better for children to stay in an orphanage than be in a loving single-parent home.
We have a huge population of children in foster care in America today. One in 5 children [20%] adopted through foster care go to loving, stable gay families. In contrast, only 3% of straight couples adopt from foster care.
Being gay is not a choice. People are born gay, straight, or bisexual. Many religions argue being gay is a choice -- then they can say it's sinful. I have several close friends and family members who are gay. It's not a choice. It's how God made them.
Thank God there are actually adoption agencies who help gay people adopt, like Lifelong Adoptions.
The lesbian couple who adopted from Russia are now the proud parents of two teenagers who are smart, kind, well-behaved, amazing. Their daughter is an honors student, now in college, and her brother will soon be in college. Both those medically fragile babies are now healthy, happy teens who love both their mamas and have had a happy childhood.
All children deserve loving parents.
I have met many orphans and all of them would have been thrilled to be adopted by a single parent or a gay couple -- because loving parents are always better than no parents.
No gay family should be turned down by a faith-based agency, but it happens. The fact that our government is endorsing that and turning over tax dollars to them is terrible. I want to bring attention to this issue because it is just WRONG.
Below, my son in the orphanage.