I was thinking today that one of the commandments you don't hear a lot about is the one to honor your parents. What does that mean, exactly?
I think it means we are supposed to live our lives the way they would want us to live our lives. Most parents [mine included] try and raise their children to be decent, moral, hardworking, kind folks. That's certainly how my parents raised me.
Now that Mom and Dad are both gone, I decided it was time to remind myself what they tried to teach me. My mother was known for a number of traits, chief among them her wonderful sense of humor and her kindness. She always said "If you don't laugh, you'll cry. Laughing is better!" So I've tried to remember that. When I see a funny meme I try to share it. When I am in a stressful situation I try to find the humor and laugh. Laughter heals.
Below are some of her other rules of living.
Good manners are really nothing more than kindness.
Mom always said that. Good manners aren't only for stuck up people. They are important because treating everyone with kindness, respect, and dignity is important. I never saw her treat anyone with anything else.
Everybody carries a box of rocks.
In other words, we all have troubles, no matter how rich, famous, or important we are. Nobody is spared from troubles. Therefore we should always strive to understand where the other person is coming from, and be kind.
He puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like I do.
That was actually something my grandfather always said. My grandfather, Bob Hasty, was a professional baseball pitcher for 5 years. During his life he met plenty of famous people. He was never overly impressed.
Dad's Wisdom
My dad, Tony Thompson, was a study in contrasts. He was always immaculately dressed and groomed at work, but at home he liked to work in the yard and tinker with the cars and he always looked like a bum. He didn't care.
Always do the right thing.
I heard him say that a million times. He taught me and my brother that no matter what, we should always do the right thing -- which was often not the easy thing.
Don't let the weather make your decisions for you.
Dad like to trot out that one when it was snowing and he was going to go to work anyway. Mom always wanted him to stay home. In a broader sense, though, what it means is if you're committed to being somewhere, do everything possible to be there.
I've gotten compliments all my adult life because if I say I am going to do something, I generally always do it. Many people don't. Dad taught me that.
Work hard and always give it 100%.
Dad was a very hard worker. I think that stemmed from a youth picking cotton and other crops on his uncle's farm -- backbreaking labor that made him appreciate his ability to work inside, wearing a suit and tie. He would often help me and my brother get jobs when we were young, because he knew a lot of business owners, but he always told us "I expect you to work hard and make me proud." He would always tell anyone who hired us "If he/she doesn't work hard, fire him/her! No hard feelings." Nepotism carried a heavy weight of responsibility.
Good manners are very important.
Like Mom, he was a stickler for manners. He wanted us to always behave correctly, in any situation. We were taught to address our elders as Sir and M'am, and much more. Manners included not hurting feelings, always being particularly kind to children and the elderly, and taking food to someone when they were having problems or mourning someone. Dad lived that idea.
I hope and pray that 2021 will be a wonderful year, far better than the awful 2020.
I will strive every day to honor my parents, and remember the many life lessons they taught me. In doing so, I hope I will inspire my children.
My parents took great joy in raising me and my brother. My mother loved being a grandmother and seeing her grandchildren grow and thrive. This is the best work we do as humans, nurturing our children and grandchildren. Nothing else is as important, IMHO.
