The Crab Chronicles

Sunday Little 5 Points

Michael has been after me for a long time to go down to Little 5 Points and browse around. We've seen plays near there and buzzed through the area without stopping, but today I decided to just go down there and walk around.

The weather was perfect [60's] and the fall colors are in full swing.

I remember when I was young, years ago, walking around that area and feeling very inadequate. I was never hip enough to look comfortable there. In fact, just the opposite. I always looked out of place. Now, I still look out of place, but the difference is I don't care! LOL

There are some benefits to aging and one is being far less self-conscious and not giving a rip about looking a certain way.

Our first stop was a store that's been there for ages and has a lot of funky, different types of clothes and gifts and actual thrift-store type stuff, Junkman's Daughter. We didn't buy anything, but I wasn't really tempted, which was good. I did get a kick out of the fashions - none of which would've been remotely tempting to me even if I was a size 6 -I did act like I was going to try this on just to hear Michael have a conniption fit -

I think $52 is a bit steep for something better suited to be cut up into carpeting for Barbie's Dream House, but whatever...

Here's Michael, caught under an interesting sign -

He was fascinated by the funky merchandise but he stuck very close to me, like he was in a haunted house...

We walked back outside and ambled down to the intersection and went into some of the stores. I got some nice shots of the outside area.

You see the tall figure walking by herself on the right? I desperately wanted a photo but she walked too fast. She was a lovely African American lady with the biggest hair I have ever seen. Like, much bigger than Coco.

below, I was standing with my back to a shop called Crystal Blue, and that caused the rainbow hues at the bottom of the shot. I love that [unintended but welcome] effect... to me, rainbows represent hope, and seeing rainbows is a sign of good luck.

Choose Wisely

You see the photo above? I was six years old. I was a flower girl in the wedding of one of Mother's cousins. I had on a lovely blue velvet dress and that strange boa thing on my head and I looked adorable except for the pained expression on my face.

Why did I look that way? I remember it vividly.

The table held just a few goodies. Weddings in 1968 were not the elaborate affairs they are today. I had discovered plates of cheese straws on the refreshment table and I was busily trying to eat them all. Quietly.

Somebody came up and snapped the photo of me, ruining my chances of eating every.last.cheese.straw. Drat. The two ladies in the background are my great aunts Marcellle and Dot and they were probably forcing me to be very sneaky anyway, but that photographer? He ruined the whole deal.

Come to think of it, it was likely my dad snapping the photo.

What's funny is that this photo tells such a funny story. I wrote about this phenomena [but not this particular photo] yesterday on my blog The Write Rainmaker. Business owners think they can slap up some generic photo on their website and it will be just fine but they underestimate the power of images.

Images can be a huge asset on a website, or not. It's a choice.

I've tried to persuade my son that all of life consists of a series of choices, and we all have the power to control our lives. We can choose our attitudes. It's a lesson it took me years to really absorb, but I am trying to get him to think about it more consciously, from an earlier age.

If I could've taken a photo of Michael's face yesterday when he came home from school, it would frighten small children. He was in a royally foul humor. I never did find out why. He is, of course, a TEENAGER, and that implies angst. 

I made him eat a snack, and we played chess outside on the patio. He got in a better mood when I let him beat me at chess.

In all truthfulness, I've always been a wretchedly bad chess player. He thinks several moves ahead and has strategies in place and all, the way you're supposed to play. I just randomly move things around. It confounds him because he can't predict what I will do.He got so mad at one point he threw my castle into the backyard, and then I made him go find it.

I think of that as good practice for married life someday. LOL

Brain Training and Bathing Beauties

Dealing with a rotten bad cold this morning, and feeling very ploha [Russian for "sick"] but I wanted to share a couple of things.

I was doing some research for a blog and found this article about giving your noggin a workout: Explanation: How Brain Training Can Make You Significantly Smarter

I don't know if the program works, but it's interesting to ponder. Mother uses the computer, farms, reads a lot of books, etc. and is sharp as a tack at 79. I know of other seniors who just sit in front of the TV all day and they don't fare as well.

I didn't feel great yesterday either but I continued scanning in old photos, including this gem of my grandmother and some of her sisters in Atlantic City around 1921 [my grandmother is second from right]:

I stood right on that same beach 83 years later and had the weirdest sense of deja vu....

Photos from the 1950's, 60's

I love old photos, particularly of people in my family and/or folks I know. I was going through a box in my closet and found a bunch of old color slides my dad had made in the 1950's. I took them to Wolf Camera and had them scanned onto a CD-Rom. Some of them would only be of interest to my extended family, but some are just cool photos on their own merit.

Dad was like me - he loved to take photos but they often didn't come out so great.

It's been a really laid back day and I have nothing really to report, so I thought I'd share some of these.

This is the only shot with me in it and I'm just a little blur...

Ironic that only about 44 years later he was leading troops in Iraq...

Below, my mother holding Bruce as a baby, with my aunt Myrtle holding my cousin Robert. The little girl is my cousin Raye, who is now a grandmother. This was about 1960. Raye and I look rather alike, both blondes.

This is my dad, sometime in the 1950's. I first thought this was Ft. Sumter but now I am thinking it was perhaps Europe. The flag is unfamiliar... Dad was a huge history buff.

This is my dad [middle] and a couple of his buddies. He was stationed in Germany in 1951 and spent all his free time sightseeing all over Europe. I think this is the French Riviera, but I'm not sure.

I've got a bunch of shots of places in Europe, particularly, Italy, and I need some help identifying the places. I am going to do a post of those shots and see if some of y'all can help me out.

Below is my mom sometime in the late 1950's, I think. I think what she's holding is a swim cap. Remember those?!

Stay warm...

Snowpalooza

Well, no school again today, and the road is still a mess. Our high yesterday was 28. The kids said when they were out yesterday they saw several cars struggling to get up the hills leading out of my neighborhood up to the main road. I wouldn't attempt to go anywhere.

Mother asked the kids yesterday how they felt about this 3 day enforced snowcation and they both enthusiastically said they loved it.

My cousin Lesleigh said she's been out playing in the snow at her apartment complex and having a "snowpalooza" of a time.

The little song I wrote yesterday was just for fun. In all truthfulness, there have been few raised voices, and very little quarreling in our house. We're all getting along remarkably well. This is the first time the family has been all together in one building without going anywhere [except outside to play for a couple of hours at a time] in, like, ever.

Now, yesterday I texted Michael while he was sledding and told him to come home and eat lunch at 3, as I had made egg salad. He had been bugging me to make egg salad and I had done as he asked. At 3:05 he calls from Colton's house and says he has already eaten lunch and can he stay longer. Well, I was very ticked off and said no, you have to come home. If he had called and told me what was up before he had eaten I probably would've said OK, but waiting until afterwards....

I have wondered whether or not across the south we will see a "baby boom" nine months from now, due to everyone being stuck inside this week. [wink wink nudge nudge]

Since we've had no Netflix mail delivery, there was no movie watching last night. The kids got in my bed and watched my little TV, and Mother and I watched a PBS program on the big TV on Carol Burnett, which was excellent. I then watched a PBS program on Jeff Bridges, which was also terrific. I can tolerate PBS because they don't have commercials.

Here are some shots from yesterday, but the first two were made by my cousin Mark, a wonderful photographer. I told Mark the one below would make a lovely Christmas card.

Mark also took the one below, which I love because it has such an amazing abstract quality -

These two I made on the back patio, because I was so intrigued by the icicles.

Snowmageddon Photos Day 2

Michael and I walked outside a little while ago, and man is it slick. Snow, then ice. Makes a nice crunch. I had on sturdy leather tennis shoes and I still felt unsteady.

We had an old tray in the garage, and I gave it to Mike to use as a makeshift sled. As he was ruefully rubbing his behind after an attempted slide down the hill, one of our neighbors walked by, and he and his wife offered the use of a real sled they have. Their kids are grown. So that was kind of them.

Alesia and Michael just left to go sledding over at the middle school with the borrowed sled. The school is walking distance from here. I hope and pray they are careful. Alesia is the voice of reason and is very traffic-savvy, but there are few cars out on neighborhood streets. So anyway, here are a few more photos.

Took this hat and scarf to Russia in 2004 when I brought Alesia home. It's so seldom cold enough to wear them here, they are in like new condition.

This is the route I'd have to take to get out of the neighborhood. Ain't happening until the road looks a LOT better...

Above, Mike hurtling down the street.

The icicles on the house are dripping. I just heard a load of snow slide off the roof. So I htink we're thawing out, but it's supposed to get very cold again tonight.

Alesia's school was already canceled again for tomorrow. Mike's school system hasn't canceled but I doubt they will go. Streets won't be clean and dry today, I don't think.

Y'all stay warm!

 

Christmas Gift Ideas

Christmas gifts are always a headache. Always. I am not so obsessive as my buddy Andrea over at The Creative Junkie, but I try hard to get everyone at least one present I think they will really like.

With my kids, it's usually easy - electronics. Now they are fully stocked. Alesia has an iPod touch [thanks eBay, I never pay full retail....] and Michael has a PSP. He wants a Wii. Not happening. Not this year anyway.I had to be creative this year, but I think they'll like their "big" presents. [I won't put down what they're getting, in case they read this post. They don't normally read my blog, but better to be safe than sorry...]

More than gifts, I like Christmas baking. My cake enterprise is going well, but I am not overwhelmed by cake orders. I have 6 cakes to make between now and January 1, and that's enough. For Michael's friend Colton, we are going to make a chocolate pound cake. Michael doesn't know it yet but HE is going to make it, with me supervising. I do not have to worry about cleanup on that one because Michael can lick cake batter off a bowl in two seconds flat, and he can clean up beaters pretty well, too.Licking the spoon is a tradition in our family.

Years ago we had a basset hound who loved to lick cake batter out of the mixing bowl. When she heard the mixer she would go flying into the kitchen and bark excitedly. Of course, that was after Bruce and I were grown and gone because if we were there, even as grownups, we were all over the cake bowl and beaters.

I know, you're thinking, RAW EGGS! OMG, they are SO dangerous. Maybe so. I've eaten a ton of raw eggs in my life, though [in batter]. I like to walk on the wild side.

If you're not a cake person but you like to read about food and recipes, and/or you just like to cook, check out a blog I am really enjoying called The South in My Mouth. Her recipes tend more toward the savory than the sweet. Just the photo on the home page makes me drool.

But that's not the point of this post, no.I digressed. Story of my life.

No, in case you're not fully done with your shopping, I am simply reminding y'all that I have written two books, Adopting Alesia: My Crusade for My Russian Daughter, which is about Alesia's adoption journey, and Jack's New Family, a children's book written from the perspecitve of an 8 year old Russian boy adopted by a single American mom. You can order them from Amazon, or if you'd like an autographed copy, shoot me an email and I will sell you one directly [[email protected]]. [Be sure and put the title of the book in the subject line because I delete emails from people I don't know.]

If you've already got both books, or they don't appeal to you, my work has appeared in several other books. Call Me Okaasan, Adventures in Multicultural Mothering is a wonderful book, compiled by Suzanne Kamata, an American who is married to a Japanese man and lives in Japan. I have an essay in there. You'll have to order that one from Amazon, I'm afraid. It's not so much about adoption as it is about mothering children in foreign countries and trying to give them some of your own culture. It's a great read.

My friend Teresa Kelleher compiled a terrific book called Snowflakes: A Flurry of Adoption Stories- By, For and About Children and Teens, and I have contributions in there, too. Michael wrote an essay right after he came here [with a lot of help] about his early life in Kazakhstan, and that's in there, too. It's tough to read, because his experiences as a small child were so terrible, but it's important to share that information. So many children adopted as older kids share the kinds of terrible early childhoods my kids had, and only by hearing the stories and understanding how trauma affects a child's brain can parents really even begin to compassionately and effectively parent those children. You'll have to order that one, too.

I leave you with some photos from Christmas past, just for fun.

This is me and my brother in about 1965. They had to bribe Bruce to sit on Santa's lap.

Below is Christmas 2007, Mike's first one here. Bruce thought Mike needed all the gun accessories, but no, not any real guns or live ammo. In the south we wait until boys are 13 or so, usually, before we start the serious weapons training. I think it's because most of us descend from warring Scottish clansmen...

Above is Christmas 2008, when Bruce was in Iraq. It was a sad day for us with him gone, but we tried to remain cheerful. I kind of went overboard on presents, overcompensating...

Below is Christmas 2009. We haven't done our Christmas photo yet this year. We need to do it after Mike gets his braces off, if I can get him to put down the popcorn...

New Adventures

Michael was a happy guy this morning, despite having to get up early and be in the orthodontist's chair at 8 a.m. He is scheduled to get his braces off December 20th! He is very excited. I am, too. Not long after that, I will have finished paying for those metal torture devices!

[Why do you never see that tense any more? Doesn't everyone say "will have finished"? I can't remember what it's called - future imperfect? Lord knows.]

Another gorgeous fall day here, in the mid 70's by this afternoon. Alesia and I went to Home Depot this morning and bought pansies. I love pansies. We pulled out the leggy impatiens and planted the pansies in the front flower beds. All the ones around the mailbox are yellow. The ones near the house are burgundy, purple, and white. Once they fluff out they will be so pretty.

Alesia is being very helpful around the house, without me asking. I was outside planting by myself and she came out, put away her iPod, and I handed her a pair of gloves. I was sweaty and my back was hurting, and she finished putting in the pansies. That never would've happened just a few months ago.

She unloaded the dishwasher yesterday without anyone telling her to, and helped me clean up the kitchen after dinner last night. May sound unimpressive to you, but it's a sign of maturity, to me. I htink living away from our home for a while helped her to appreciate us. We live very modestly, and we don't have new cars or a Wii, or any other obvious status symbols, but there's plenty to eat, she can sleep undisturbed, and there are three people and one furbaby here who love her dearly. That's a change from where she was, for sure.

Well, Michael made almost 100 on the social studies test he didn't study for, which he told me with great glee. Guess I will have to figure out another way to motivate him.

He keeps losing his glasses. He left them on the fence at the tennis court tonight. A couple of weeks ago he left them at another child's house - on the floor! Yikes. Thank goodness I got insurance on them.

Alesia got another hour of driving in today. She is close to having enough hours to get her license. I sort of dread it, though. Anxiety will be my constant companion. She doesn't do well with maps. Atlanta is a big, complicated city.

Alesia is eating like a horse. For lunch she had a big roast beef sandwich, chips, and a Hormel lunch portion thingy my brother gave us. For dinner she had two fat homemade burritos and a huge bowl of green beans. I am glad to see her eating. She had gotten awfully thin.

Otherwise, I don't have much to report. Things are rocking along here. Each day is a new adventure. LOL

The Past Seven Years in Photos

Amazing the changes the years have made...

 

This is the first photo I have of Alesia. She was 11 years old, so it was about 2002-03.The photo below was made just a couple of months before I got her home in the fall of 2004.

Here's one after she had been home a short time:

This is one of my favorite shots, because she looks so beautiful -

Here is Michael shortly before he came home:

Here he is on his 11th birthday, shortly after he came home:

And here is my rapidly growing young man, today:

Below, Alesia, Mike and Coco in 2008:

And here they are in summer 2010:

The shot above was made the other day. Mike is almost as tall as Alesia!

Hope you've enjoyed this little trip through time...

Choices

Pasha arrived last night. He looks great, and is his usual, sweet self. He had been in California for several days but never really adjusted to the time. I told him he needs to get his body clock adjusted to here. He's trying.

We went to Publix, where he bought a cheesecake. I found him photographing it this afternoon before anyone got a slice. He told everyone in California that we have the best cheesecake here in Atlanta, at Publix. it IS truly very good. It's fun to get the variety wheel because you get 4 different kinds of cheesecake.

At one point I found him staring at the men's body wash, having a hard time deciding. In Russia you don't get the huge variety of options that you find here. We talked about it and he made a good choice. I know this aspect of culture shock well, having seen it with Michael.

Pasha and I saw a terrific little movie this afternoon Get Low.

It stars Robert Duvall and Sissy Spacek. Very entertaining little film. It's a character piece about an old hermit in the 1930's who plans to attend his own funeral. The story is supposed to take place in Tennessee. the only thing that marred it is that nobody in it sounded like they were from Tennessee.. I lived there over 20 years and I know that accent.

Pasha took me and Michael and my friend Steve and his kids Colton and Lydia to our favorite hibachi restaurant for a lovely dinner. I had shrimp and veggies. Everything was really good. I am drinking tons of water though, which always happens when I get too much MSG.

Lesleigh went to see Alesia yesterday, and reports she seems to be OK. I have not had a chance to hear a full report. Alesia is in no imminent danger though I still worry. She's dropped out of high school.

She is making really poor choices right now, but there's not a thing I can do about them.

I'm still praying and grieving...