The Crab Chronicles

Traveling Then and Now

As a child, I used to wonder why my mother never set off on a trip without a really big straw basket filled with kitchen supplies and snacks. I went through that basket one day after my mom and I moved in together and it still held coffee, Vienna sausages, straws, wet wipes, Woolite, paper napkins, salt and pepper, a jar of nuts, plastic cutlery, and I don't recall what else. I asked Mom why she had always carried all that on trips and she looked puzzled and said well her mother had carried the same basket on all trips, plus blankets, and it made a lot of sense.

My grandmother Memaw Hasty was the greatest grandmother a future paralegal could ever have. She was meticulous about being prepared for any situation. Travel by car was seen by her and my grandfather as a grand adventure. Of course, cars back then were prone to flat tires and they might sit on the side of the road for hours if there was no spare, or the jack didn't work, etc. Restaurants were not always available, even if you'd been traveling for hours and were ravenously hungry. My memaw's travel basket meant if she and her fellow travelers were stranded they could survive on the side of the road for hours or even a day or two, if necessary.

While researching for my book Return to Marietta, Mom told me that when her oldest brother Bobby was a baby, Memaw missed her family terribly and a couple of times she drove by herself with infant Bobby from California to Georgia to see the family. She packed the travel basket and blankets and canteens of water, and of course a loaded pistol.

I had forgotten about canteens. They were small tin water bottles carried by soldiers. Before bottled water, one carried a canteen of water. We always had one around the house, though Mom was more fond of a thermos.

I thought I would reminisce a little about how much travel has changed in the last hundred years or so, since the summer is when most of us take long car trips. [below, my mother and grandparents, sometime around 1942 or thereabouts, on a trip]

This is from my mother's memoir, Singing to the Cows:

"Fast food as we know it now did not exist until less than 50 years ago. There were no expressways. We drove on two lane roads, through small towns or through big cities glutted with traffic. So if a family was traveling, they might find something to eat or drink at a gas station – or maybe nothing but a soda and package of peanuts at best. My mother always carried snacks, water to drink, wet wash cloths, first aid supplies, etc. Most often, we had a thermos of sweet tea mixed with fruit juices. For a longer trip, there would be a full meal. Back then, the food was certainly better and cheaper and no waiting in line. I carried big beach towels because they could serve as tablecloths, wraps, etc."

I remember my dad packing the station wagon for us to take on trips and getting all the suitcases in the car, and then his look of consternation when Mom came out carrying the travel basket for him to put in the car. "We don't need all this stuff!" he would fuss.

Sometimes the trips were much shorter - basically day trips. My grandparents loved to picnic. Nowadays people don't picnic that much, probably because of the proliferation of fast food places. Even as a child [1960's] I remember driving back and forth to Atlanta and there was a little restaurant somewhere on Highway 78 where we always stopped and ate, but it was a regular restaurant and there was nothing fast about it.

Anyway, here are some of Mom's picnic memories.

"My parents, as well as the rest of the family, just loved going on picnics. They had a system of what to carry and just how to pack it. This was mostly before Tupperware, Styrofoam, canned drinks, and lots of convenience items. We did have a large thermos jug which would be filled with a combination of sweet tea and fruit juices - delicious! Also, there was no plastic wrap or foil – but waxed paper was fine. The food was about what one would expect: fried chicken, potato salad, ham, fruit salad, slaw, cold biscuits, usually a pot of green beans with ham hock, and someone always brought a wonderful home baked cake, and cobblers, and pies. They kept the old tablecloths for picnics. We always met at the Atlanta area parks that had nice picnic tables, most often with thatched appearing roofs, or a pavilion. The adults would sit around and visit and the young folks would take long walks around the park, after the meal."

I remember Mom sometimes persuading my dad to take picnic foods on trips so we didn't have to eat fast foods, but he was always impatient and grouchy with the whole idea. Standing outside and eating sandwiches out of the trunk while cars whizzed by and Dad grumbled was not fun, at all. (Maybe that's why I have never understood tailgating. Eating out of the trunk of the car just doesn't appeal to me.)

Even just in my lifetime, taking a trip has changed dramatically. I can remember driving for hours without a gas station in sight, and my dad pulling the car over so I could squat and pee, with the car door and Mom hiding me from the sight of anyone coming down the road. We always carried paper napkins and/or toilet paper in the travel basket, for potty emergencies.

My dad taught me how to change a tire when I was 18. I was amazed to learn later that not all girls could change a tire, or check a car's oil, or add water to a car, or use cables to jump start a car. Dad wanted me to be prepared.

Here's what prompted me to write this blog.

My son Michael was asked by a friend, a chef, to drive to SC this weekend and help with the cooking for his niece's quinceañera. Michael had never driven 2.5 hours alone before and I tried not to freak out. I was driving 6 hours back and forth to college at the age of 19, but Michael has just never needed to drive anywhere alone before. I asked him if he wanted to take cold drinks, a flashlight, etc. but he stopped me before I recited a long list of stuff and said "Mom, if I need anything I will just stop and get it?!" like DUH, Mom.

He called me when he reached his destination, as I had asked.

Even today, when I travel I take my version of the travel basket, for emergencies. I advise y'all to do so also. Picnics are nice, too.

#travelinglongago, #twentiethcenturytraveltips, #familypicnictips, #familypicnics, #packingfortrips, #cartripslongago, #cartripsofyesteryear

Twenty Questions [and more] With Nathaniel Lande

One of the clearest memories of my childhood is the fact that my parents went to a wedding out in California when I was in first grade, and it was the wedding of Bob Hope’s daughter to Nathaniel Lande, son of prominent Augusta doctor Robert Greenblatt, who happened to be a customer of my Dad’s at the bank. Mom wrote a blog about the wedding here. It was the trip of a lifetime.

When I was editing Mom’s post I Googled Nathaniel Lande just to see what had happened to him since that long-ago wedding. I found his website and read, fascinated by his life. He and Linda Hope have been divorced for years, but he had gone on to a fascinating and full life.

 

From his website: At CBS he began his career in the mailroom, and soon was selected by the legendary Michael Dann and William Paley, to work for the head of Programming. Then he joined the producing staff of PM East, hosted by Mike Wallace, with his good friend, Peter Lassally, (who would later become producer of the Tonight Show at NBC). By night, the young and enterprising producers searched for talent discovering Woody Allen at the Bon Soir, a small club in New York, and Barbra Streisand at One Fifth Avenue, and were the first to book them on national television.

On his website, there was a form email for folks wanting to contact him and I fired off an email and introduced myself. Much to my shock, he answered, fairly quickly. He remembered Dad very well, and spoke of him fondly.

Nat has lived an incredible life. He worked at CBS and NBC for twenty years. He was with Time Life for years and traveled the world. He has written numerous books. He planned events for the White House and knew two presidents. While still a student [at Oxford] he wrote a show that was very successful in London.

He’s also credited with inventing the first electronic book, and directed two award winning documentaries. He won an Academy Award for technology after he invented a type of camera lens.

I’ve gone far afield from my usual Twenty Questions format, just because Nat is such a fascinating interview. Talking to him over the course of two days was informative and delightful.

How long has it been since you visited Augusta? I haven’t been in Augusta -- maybe it’s gotta be 30 years or more. [We went on to reminisce about Augusta, a bit.]

I remember the Town Tavern restaurant – it had great steaks.

I grew up with Billy Morris [son of the newspaper editor and later of Morris Communications]. Billy and I used to ride horses every day. We were the best of friends.

You’re the only person I’ve interviewed that has homes in two different places. How much time do you spend in each place every year? I live in California. I rent out the New York apartment now. It’s overlooking the park. A very special place. It’s just one bedroom, but there’s an upstairs, and a very spacious living room/dining room. It’s a landmark building and every room overlooks the park. I’ve had it for 50 years. I was very lucky when the building became a condo I had the opportunity to buy. It’s just quadrupled in value 2 or 3 times. I have a great tenant who pays me a very good rate.

 

PRAISING FAMOUS MEN

You’ve met two presidents, Kennedy and Johnson. Tell me about that. Richard Atler used to produce a lot of shows for Kennedy and he recruited me as one of his assistants. When Johnson came along I was close to Bill Moyers and Liz Carpenter and they asked me to produce shows at the White House. The first one I did was a history of presidential campaign songs starting in 1800 and going up to Johnson; it was called Sing Along with Millard Fillmore. Walter Cronkite narrated – a soft-spoken gentleman, a lovely man.” 

I did another show based on a narrative from Thomas Wolfe. It was a special event. I liked Lyndon Johnson a lot. I liked the whole family. One of my favorite stories in a book called The Cigar Connoisseur: An Illustrated History and Guide to the World's Finest Cigars [even tho I’m a nonsmoker] involves Johnson.

I attended a dinner at the White House. Each table was asked to have a designee get up and speak. When it came around to our table, I stood up and quoted a verse form Thomas Wolfe, “Look Pilgrim, look to the promise and the hope…” It was a lovely paragraph. After dinner, Bill Moyers said the president would like you to join him [in the White House]. I walked into his bedroom and there was Gregory Peck and Bill Moyers and Hubert Humphrey, and Joe Califano. The president was having a massage and was stark naked.

It was kind of hard to keep a straight face. As soon as anyone said anything remotely funny we just burst into laughter and the president looked at us skeptically. Finally he turned his attention to me and said “Those were some pretty nice words. Hubert, pull out some cufflinks, and give a pair to Nathaniel, and give a pair to Gregory.” The president gets off the table, and he presents me with the gold cufflinks. I just bowed politely and thanked him. He was naked. It didn’t bother him at all.

About a year later I’m in Paris, coming home from a dinner party, walking down Avenue Foch on the way back to the Bristol Hotel. Coming up the street I see Gregory Peck and we meet. Both of us laughed and said we’ll never forget that night. We both agreed nobody would ever believe it. We exchanged phone numbers so we could vouch for each other.

We were all smoking cigars and they were left over from Kennedy – and they were straight from Havana.

On President Kennedy: I was there when Marilyn Monroe sang Happy Birthday to him at Madison Square Garden. He loved it. Jackie didn’t think much of it. [Monroe was rumored to have had an affair with Kennedy.]

One source I found said you were friends with Ernest Hemingway. He was a large gruff man. He had a gravelly voice. He liked to think of himself as a man’s man, a sportsman. My father was a visiting professor of medicine in Cuba, pre-Castro, in the 40’s and 50’s and we used to go to Havana. It was my father who was first introduced and they became friends, and my dad was his doctor occasionally. Papa had a place outside Cuba and when he left he gave it to the nation. It’s been left intact. [You can see photos of the home here.] He and his wife Mary lived there. He was a very loving man and when I was 7 or 8 and we would go out on the Pilar, his boat, and fish, and go hunting on horseback. I have many many stories of time with him.

The last time I saw him, I was in Spain with a friend. We went down to have something to eat and there was this very provincial room, a tavern, and there were 3 people sitting in the next table and I said to my friend would you like to meet Hemingway? Of course. Hemingway said “Natty! My how you’ve grown.” He invited me to go to the bullfights the next day, and we went.

 

BOOKS

Your latest novel is The Life and Times of Homer Sincere. What inspired you to write that? How these characters come to you I don’t know but they arrive on your doorstep and you start living with them. They take you with them. It’s just a story about friendship and two friends and what they meant to each other. Neither could have been the person they became without the other. The things they experienced together… it’s glorious story of friendship.

When your son was growing up, did you do a lot of traveling? Did you take him along? When he was around 10 or 11 I was with Time/Life and I had written a speech for the head of TWA and he said how much do I owe you and I said I’m glad to do it. Next thing I know, there were two first class tickets to Paris on my desk. So I said to Andrew, are you still having trouble with that term paper on French history? He said yeah Dad. So we went to Paris. We checked into the Bristol Hotel and were sitting there having lunch and the waiters were serving us pomme soufflés, tarte tatin and crème brulees, paying a lot of attention to Andrew, and we had a great time. Finally I received the bill and it was quite extravagant, about $300. And Andrew looked at me and said Gee Dad I really love Paris! [he laughed at the memory]

[Note: Nat and his son went on to write, years later, a terrific travel book called The 10 Best of Everything, Third Edition: An Ultimate Guide for Travelers]

You are credited with inventing the electronic book in 1991. What brought that about? I didn’t invent it but I certainly pioneered it. I developed one of the first prototypes. There was a major article about it in Publishers Weekly in Sept. 1991. I’m afraid I was a little bit too early. They were more comfortable with the printed word on the printed page. I thought it would be great for textbooks, and an enormous saving on paper. We had a very nice prototype. Ours was in color. It was a long time coming. Ours at that time was using smart card technology which means you can hold maybe 50 titles. When Amazon came along and you could download it electronically that was a convenient way for distribution.

I loved your book Cricket. I know a lot of it was based on your own life. Was it therapeutic to write?

Most first novels are largely autobiographical. It seems endemic of first novels. They say write what you know. It was very honest, very straightforward. I got no flak about it. My father used to keep it in his office and it helped sell copies. He lived to see 2 or 3 of the books.

Tell me about your book Dispatches from the Front News Accounts of American Wars, 1776-1991

After a long history with Time Inc. and having covered the Vietnam War extensively, and when I was a professor of journalism, I got interested in some of the assignments. With a lot of help from my students doing research we crafted a nice book. I knew a lot of the correspondents from Time. I used to fly with Larry Burrows. He was shot down in Cambodia about 3 weeks after I flew with him. Paul Schutzer was another Life photographer. I brought his body back from the 6 day war.

 

TWENTY QUESTIONS

What is your full name? I took my mother’s name, Lande. I reversed it. It was Nathaniel Lande Greenblatt, and I became Nathaniel Greenblatt Lande. I started writing under Nathaniel Lande. Dad encouraged it. He thought it was great. He thought Lande was much simpler.

Where would you live, if you could live anywhere in the world? London  - I went to Oxford, and did my graduate work there. Still have a lot of friends there. I try to get over there for an extended time once a year. My second choice would be Buenos Aires. Buenos Aires has Recoleta, a section designed by the French and is more Parisian than France. The buildings, food, atmosphere -- very French. I also love to tango and play polo.

What is your favorite movie and why? There are so many… I remember a movie about 10 years ago called The Postman. It’s really hard to identify just one movie. I just saw Woody Allen’s film Magic in the Moonlight and I thought it was a hoot.

What was your least-favorite subject in school when you were a kid? Math. I was too young to really understand the concepts and the mathematical formulas to the universe. A lot of formulas and memorization and I couldn’t relate to it that well.

What was your nickname when you were a kid? Natty – my dad called me Natty boy.

Do you believe in God? I believe in God, but not in a formal sense. There is certainly a force. I also believe in nature and the scientific equations.

What sound or noise do you love?  I guess I love the sounds of the ocean. We’re on a hillside, a mountainside, 10 minutes from the ocean.

If you could do anything other than what you do, as a profession, what would it be? I think perhaps directing more films, feature films, and also plays for Broadway. I would’ve slanted my career in that direction. Instead, I had to make a living so I started in the mailroom at CBS and worked my way up and never really returned to playwriting, which I loved. I loved playwriting and theater. [He wrote a successful play in England and it had a run in the West End.] I won the prize at Duke, and they had a musical playwriting contest and I won that in my junior year. Took my BA at Duke, graduated 1956, then went to Oxford. Years later I was a professor of journalism at Chapel Hill. I went back to Trinity College Dublin and earned my doctorate when I was in my 50’s.

If heaven exists, what do you think it is like? I would hope that it would be a little bit more peaceful, and easier, and without prejudice. Satisfying. Enjoyable. Filled with the things that you appreciate most.

Do you have siblings? I do, I have a brother who died a few years ago. I have a sister who lives in Atlanta.

What is your favorite memory of childhood [something specific]?  A houseman we had named Andrew was the most delightful and colorful man I’ve ever known. He had all the attributes of wisdom and kindness. He looked after me, brought me up. I adored him.

If you had to choose between one week traveling around the USA by car, or one week traveling around Europe on a train, which would you choose and why? At this point in my life, having logged about 3 million miles in the last 5 years for National Geographic,  I would say just hopping in a car and rediscover the US. I would like to see the national parks – Yellowstone, the Smokies, the Blue Ridge Highway from Virginia to North Carolina – it’s beautiful country.

What inspires you? Music. Great passions in a book. A good deed that’s carried out by someone else.

Which holiday do you prefer, Christmas or July 4th? Christmas. It’s a time of year of giving and it’s surrounded with so much tradition and color. It’s special to family and friends.

What project or idea are you most passionate about, right now? Well I am working on two new books, and so being a writer. I find that I have to force myself not to talk about it. I’d rather it come out as a written word rather than a spoken narrative. Until I see it published I try to keep it within me.

Do you know how to cook? I can cook maybe 5 or 6 special dishes. Sometimes I cook to impress my wife. I certainly cooked during my courtship. I’m not a great cook but I appreciate the great chefs. People seem to like the dishes. One is fettucine which I have a glorious and secret recipe for. The other is popovers. I make them on Sundays and we have them with butter and jam. It’s more traditional in New England, in the country.

What is your favorite thing to cook/eat? What I miss terribly is we had a cook who made southern fried chicken better than anyone in the world. She had an iron skillet which was 50 years old -- which my son inherited. She used to dip the chicken breasts in batter and fry them in Crisco. She also made chocolate brownies. I’ve never had a brownie as good.

If you could go on vacation anywhere in the world, for 2-4 weeks, all expenses paid, where would you go and why? I guess I would just hang out in London, for a month. From there I can fan out to Europe. Everything is reasonably close. It’s a good base.

How did you meet your wife?

My wife was a dancer with the Bolshoi. We met in New York. I was sitting in a café. It was a little French Bistro. She walked in with a friend of mine. I was introduced to her and I never looked back. That was 18 years ago.

What question has nobody ever asked you, but you wanted to answer? I would like to think I’m reasonably open and having enjoyed so much life experience and met so many people, I can’t think of a question that I never had an opportunity to answer.

Twenty Questions With Judy

My friend Judy Thompson and I met in our wonderful book group, The Over 50 Non-Intellectual Read Fun Books Club.  Our dynamic leader runs a very loose ship but it’s always lots of fun. In the meeting last Saturday Judy mentioned she could use some marketing help with her travel business.  I met her for lunch on Monday and we brainstormed. All of my clients are attorneys, so it was fun to talk about a different profession for a change.

I was intrigued to find Judy is a travel agent. I honestly thought nobody used travel agents any more.

Judy is an independent agent for Uniglobe Five Star Travel. (Her contact information is below.) It’s great that she gets to work from home.

Judy specializes in tours and cruises.

“People don’t realize that most of the time a travel agent can find the same or better rates, even finding perks not accessible to the public.“

I know from my own experience on my adoption trips, it’s great to be able to call your travel agent if there’s an issue, like the hotel room isn’t available or you need another ticket for your flight, etc. Judy handles that sort of thing for her clients and she’s a lot easier to reach than the 800 number of the airline or hotel company.

She often books travel a year in advance. “Often times a cruise line or tour company will have great rates that  are only available months in advance.”

Where do most of her clients like to cruise? I asked her. “In this area, most people want to cruise the Caribbean seeking out warm weather.  However, I’ve done several European cruises this year.  I was able to find a great rate on an Alaskan cruise for a couple celebrating their 50^th wedding anniversary.

She gets a lot of repeat customers. “Frequent travelers tend to be a bit more adventurous and take longer trips.”

Judy is only a phone call away.  You don’t necessarily need to be in Atlanta. You can reach her at 404-378-1080.

I asked her how the industry has changed, now that everyone uses computers.  “Most of the cruise lines use electronic tickets, same as the airline industry. If you are not familiar with computers or you don't have a printer, I will fill out the necessary informational forms and mail paper documentation,” she explains.

Judy has been on many cruises. “I love cruising. You either love it or you don’t.”

What type of cruise does she like? “I like the river cruises best. The boats are much smaller, making it easier to dock in smaller ports. The smaller boats take you to small towns and you get a better feel for the people and area.  Cruising on The American Queen on the Mississippi River is fun and a part of American history."

(I would be thinking of Mark Twain the entire time if I could cruise the Mississippi!)

She also likes to try new cuisines. "The river cruises in Europe serve recipes made with local fresh foods which I like. I don’t want to go to Europe and have a hamburger from McDonalds.”

Why cruises? “A cruise is great because everything is right there. Adults have activities and entertainment and the kids usually have a kid’s age appropriate program.  There are numerous dining options and you don’t have to get off the ship in port.”

The ships usually pull into a port in the morning and stay anywhere from 8-12 hours.  Most of the port calls are for a day. Sometimes a European cruise will port overnight.

“Over Thanksgiving I am taking a Celebrity cruise out of Ft. Lauderdale. Our ports of call are St. Kitt’s, St. Maarten, and San Juan.”

One of Judy’s passions is for genealogy. “I’ve only been to Italy once but it wasn’t a genealogy type of trip. I belong to an Italian genealogy group. I’ve done quite a bit of research. The internet makes researching a whole lot easier. I used to troop through old cemeteries, visit small libraries, and go into dusty old basements in little courthouses. Genealogy is a history puzzle. That’s why I like mystery books more than anything. That mystery part in genealogy goes into that mindset – why my ancestors came to this country and when. My dad’s side of the family is Italian. They were from San Lorenzo, north and east of Naples.”

Where else would she like to go? “I haven’t been able to do all the traveling I’d like to do. I’d love to go to Australia and New Zealand but there are other places closer I haven’t seen. I’d love to see all the US national parks.”

Independent Travel Agent
UNIGLOBE FIVE STAR TRAVEL
T. 404-378-1080
E. [email protected]
website: 

www.judysctt.com

What is your full name? Judith Thompson

Where would you live, if you could live anywhere in the world? Right now I am actually perfectly happy with Decatur. Decatur is a unique little area that offers a lot. I’m close to art galleries, the airport, the Fox Theatre, but it also has a hometown feel. I would really have to think about that a while.

What is your favorite movie and why? I am not a movie person. However, I loved the Harry Potter movies.

What was your least-favorite subject in school when you were a kid? Probably Geography. (Ironic!)

What was your nickname when you were a kid? I don’t think I had one. I don’t remember anybody calling me anything but Judy.

Do you believe in God? Yes. I don’t think there’s a person sitting in the sky.  I think of God as an energy force, a force of love and goodness.

What sound or noise do you love? Wind chimes. I have a whole slew of them – probably 5 or 6 out front. I love the sounds of the wind chimes.

If you could do anything other than what you do, as a profession, what would it be? I’d still travel.  I hated Geography in school.  I didn’t realize or care about geography or history until I started genealogy research-- and all of a sudden history and geography really meant something.

If heaven exists, what do you think it is like? I don’t envision it as a building or a place. I think maybe it’s less specific, more of a just an area…

Do you have siblings? Yes. 

What is your favorite memory of childhood [something specific]? Not a special day but a special time when I was little and I lived with my grandparents on their farm. It was a laid back, peaceful time. 

If you had to choose between one week traveling around the USA by car, or one week traveling around Europe on a train, which would you choose and why?  I’d want to do BOTH! I’d want to get off the train a lot. I’ve been to Niagara Falls and the Grand Canyon but there are so many other places to see and things to do here in the US. 

What or who inspires you? Probably my sons, they really do. 

Which holiday do you prefer, Christmas or July 4th? July 4^th because it’s a fun time and there’s not a lot of pressure to make everything perfect. Not a lot of cooking, no worry about gifts. You just enjoy the day. 

What project or idea are you most passionate about, right now? I want to dig deeper into family history. I love family stories. 

Do you know how to cook?  Yes. 

What is your favorite thing to cook/eat? I have a special pound cake recipe that came from my grandmother and it’s a very good recipe. I have sent it to my sons many times. Cakes have gone to California, New Jersey, foreign military bases, all over. 

If you could go on vacation anywhere in the world, for 2-4 weeks, all expenses paid, where would you go and why?  I would go to Italy. I’d really like to go and do more in depth genealogy research.  

Who do you love the most in the world? My children and grandchildren. 

What question has nobody ever asked you, but you wanted to answer?  I don’t know.

Realities of Travel in Russia

I was pretty amused to see this story posted by a friend on Facebook: 5 Reasons to be Really Glad You Aren't Going to Sochi for the Olympics, because it's very accurate and in line with what I found when traveling in Russia for my adoption trips in 2003-2004.

The story mentions things like toilets where you can't flush the paper, uncovered manholes, and dirty tap water. Yep. Experienced all those.

I also was happy to just find a bathroom in a public store or other building. Usually, in stores, you are told there is no bathroom for customers. I spent a very uncomfortable afternoon in Moscow in 2004, learning that fact.

Or how about Journalists at Sochi are live-tweeting their hilarious and gross hotel experiences? Again, none of those things surprise me.

Don't ever expect an elevator to work in a hotel or other building. Sometimes they work. Often they don't. If they do work, they are usually tiny. Like, 4 people will know what kind of deoderant you wear.

Hot water for showering? Good luck. Don't count on it.

I never drank tap water in Russia, or any foreign country, for that matter. Buy bottled water. lots of it. Brush your teeth with it.

One of the first Russian phrases I memorized was "Vada bee-yez gah-za, pah-zhalstah." Translation" "Water without carbonation, please." Helpful when you can't locate bottled water in a store because there are 5,000 bottles of vodka and only 3 bottles of water.

Stray dogs are everywhere in Russia. Very sad, but true. I have heard that the stray dogs around Sochi are being poisoned. Although this sounds cruel, and it is, you have to remember that human children in orphanages often go hungry, are cold, and are turned out to fend for themselves at 16 or 17, with no education or job training.

Cars don't usually obey traffic laws. I was nearly killed walking down a sidewalk in Moscow, when a small car jumped the curb and came racing towards me. I jumped out of the way. The car stopped. The driver jumped out and walked away, never apologizing or even looking at me. The car stayed on the sidewalk.

When I was on one of my adoption trips, an agency rep met me at the airport in Moscow and had to get me to a different airport - there are a bunch of them in Moscow. The car ride was harrowing. I gave my heart to Jesus many times. He drove on the median. He drove on the shoulder. He sat on the horn whenever another car was in the way. I was a shaky mess by the time we got to the airport.

The customer is not always right in Russia. On one of my last days there, I forgot to give the hotel cafe waitress my coupon for a free breakfast before ordering. We got our food and ate. When the bill came I showed her the coupon. She said sorry, you must pay. I didn't get the free breakfast because I didn't follow the rules about showing the coupon at the proper time. There was no apology, even.

This may be different now, but when I was flying in Russia, on Russian airlines, you didn't get to choose your seat. You sat wherever Aeroflot or whoever wanted you to sit. If you didn't like it, too bad.

American airlines now are weighing bags and charging extra for overweight or oversized luggage. That's been going on for a long time in other parts of the world.

Matt Lauer on the Today show did a piece the other day about Russian grocery stores not selling American products. Well duh. The grocery store he showed in the piece actually looked far nicer than most of the ones I saw. He had a lot of liquor in the buggy I noticed, not any food.

When my kids were small, they could buy vodka or any other kind of booze. My son was sent to the liquor store alone at less than 6 years old, at night, and vodka was sold to him. That was Kazakhstan but it's very similar to Russia. Kids in my daughter's orphanage often bought beer and cigarettes, no questions asked.

Lots of people in Russia still smoke, and cigarettes are everywhere.

Hotels are not the same as they are here. Most middle-priced American hotel rooms are luxurious compared to the average Russian hotel room. Russian hotels usually have single beds. Often there is no shower curtain. Forget about free shampoo and soaps, unless you are in an American hotel [like a Renaissance or Holiday Inn].

The front desk will ask for your passport when you first check in, and will make a copy and give to the police. If you don't like that, too bad. I doubt that policy has changed.

Americans take a lot of freebies for granted. We don't have to pay for bags in stores. We don't have to pay for ketchup in restaurants. We get free salt and pepper.

We don't have to carry our passports everywhere here.

I have a feeling we are going to be hearing a lot more about journalists and others being uncomfortable in Sochi.

this was the street outside my hotel in Petropavlovsk, Kazakhstan. Russian streets look very similar. I witnessed several accidents while there. Side streets often don't get cleaned off.

this was my room at the Moscow hotel in 2004, the old hotel Ukraina. By Russian standards it was huge and luxurious.

Flying Around Russia

I was horrified to see in the news today that a plane crash in Russia has killed at least 50 people. I said a prayer for those families. I know a lot about flying in Russia.

Most folks don't realize the geography of Russia is fascinating and a bit scary. There are 3 distinct regions in Russia - western Russia, near Europe, eastern Russia [Vladivostock, Khabarovsk, Sakhalin Island] and Siberia, the vast middle.

When I adopted Alesia in 2004, I had to make 3 trips. I had already made a trip in 2003, with the choir. Each time, I had to fly to Moscow [9-10 hours], then get a 9 hour flight to Khabarovsk.

I was scheduled to leave Russia [flying from Khabarovsk to Moscow] on my first adoption trip in 2004 and the flight got postponed until the next day. I had to spend an extra night in the hotel and of course the airline didn't reimburse me, but that's how it is there. The next morning, I flew out on a horrible, creaky old airplane, for a harrowing 9 hour flight across Siberia. The toilet seats were wooden! You could see the ground clearly, we were flying so low. I sat behind an old man so smelly I got up and went to the bathroom to escape the smell. There was a big group of drunk young men, too. When we stopped to refuel in Novosibirsk, nobody was allowed off the plane to smoke and I thought there was going to be a riot. Talk about nerve wracking.

I remember looking out of the plane window, at the ground below, and marveling that we flew for hours and hours without seeing a house, a shack, a road - NOTHING. Siberia, indeed.

As you can see from the map above, Kazakhstan is right below Russia. Michael is from Northern Kazakhstan, just below Siberia.

My favorite story of flying in Russia [my 4 trips in 2003/04] is the time I was on a flight and squished in to a middle seat on a 4-across, and the plane was still on the ground. I looked up, and this tall blonde flight attendant came barreling down the aisle glaring at me like I was a terrorist. She didn't smile, she just told me loudly to get my things and follow her. Everyone on the plane was staring. I was instantly terrified. She just led me up to a seat behind the bulkhead where there was only one other person on the row and said "You will find this more comfortable." It was far more comfortable.

However, I nearly passed out from the anxiety.

She REALLY needed to work on her customer service skills.

Another time, I flew with a drunk Russian man in front of me who was loud and drinking for about an hour, then popped the seat back until he was practically in my lap, and slept and snored most of the way [8 hours]. I read a book.

I can NEVER sleep on planes.

In all fairness, most of my flights in and around Russia and Kazakhstan went fine.Their airlines are different from ours, especially in that they assign seats and they don't care where you want to sit, and they charge you for overweight baggage, but my thoughts were always, when in Rome...

When Michael took his first plane ride, from Petropavlovsk to Almaty, it was a tiny plane and it flew low, and he got a great view of the country. A middle aged couple were so sweet to him, pointing out things in Russian, and letting him look out their window. He didn't sit through most of the 5 hour flight. We were in the back section and had it mostly to ourselves except for the couple.

When we left Almaty and flew to Frankfurt overnight, the Lufthansa folks were incredibly sweet to him, and very kind when I had to run all over the Frankfurt airport getting our baggage and getting on the flight to Atlanta. I had to leave Michael in the Lufthansa office for handicapped and older folks, because they wouldn't let me take him to the baggage claim area of the airport without a visa. Huge, nerve-wracking mess but that was German customs, not the airlines' fault.

In summary, I have not flown since 2007 and, God willing, I hope I never have to fly anywhere again...

Travel Blogging

Michael and watched a delightful movie last night, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, which is almost entirely set in India. I love it.

Michael, who has a pulled muscle in his leg and was lying on the couch swaddled in a blanket, was less enthused, but I attribute that to our ages. He is 16. I am 50 and much closer to retirement age.

It was a chance to watch some amazing actors [Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Bill Nighy, Tom Wilkinson] plus some British character actresses whose faces I know but not their names [Penelope Wilton, Celia Imrie]. All the performances are outstanding.

The story is about a group of retirees who for various reasons don't want to stay in England and so they go to The Marigold Hotel to retire. All of them are delightful, witty, intelligent, etc. - except Maggie Smith's character, who starts off the movie decidedly UNpleasant but ends up much nicer. She is a versatile enough actress and pulls that subtle transformation off flawlessly.

It's also directed by John Madden, who directed one of my all-time favorite films Shakespeare in Love.

Huge bonus: feel like I've been to India now. Watch the trailer and tell me you don't want to see this.

 

The character played by Judi Dench blogs about India, and we hear her blog entries in the narration. And thus my only faint criticism of the film.These snippets are heard in the trailer:

"This is a new and different world. The challenge is to cope with it, and not just to cope, but thrive."

"India, like life itself I suppose, is about what you bring to it."

The problem is that if you're writing a daily blog, which I know something about [cough cough] you are not going to be profound or even pithy, every stinking day.

My blog about Michael's adoption was a lot about my 4 weeks in Kazakhstan, the most exotic place I have ever been. A sample:

A word about yurts, and Kazakhstan. As best I can tell it’s a hut made of heavy felt, and the nomadic folks who lived in Kaz in ancient times always lived in yurts. Kaz is part of the old Silk Road, which is the route traders took from Europe to China for hundreds of years. The culture was built around horses, which is why you find horsemeat on the menu a lot, even now.

Most of my time was spent in the orphanage, visiting Michael, which I tried to document in as much detail as possible, since Mother and many of my friends and relatives were reading every day:

Michael spent some time coloring in a Lion King coloring book I had brought him, and we played with the translation device. He was able to type in a lot of Russian words and get the English  word and seemed fascinated. I also quizzed him on his American words – please, thank you, boy, girl, mother, father, brother, sister, dog. He practiced writing his American name. We sang the ABC song.

[looking down the street from my hotel in Petropavlovsk]

I wish I had been able to say profound things every day, but I am not that good a writer. I tried to not dwell too much on the weird or negative stuff, like the fact if you are in a store and have to use the bathroom, too bad. Most public places will not have a clean bathroom for you, or let you use the bathroom at all. You can easily order something like soup and inadvertently eat horsemeat. The streets are filled with filthy snow most of the time. Most of the women dress like hookers. That sort of thing.

I love reading travel blogs by real people who are honest about their experiences. It makes me feel like I've been there.

I have an old friend from high school who is in Italy and posting some nice photos, but I want to READ about her trip, not just see photos on Facebook. I know, I am being unreasonable, not everyone has the ability to write, but still...

I like to live vicariously.

Two of the attorneys I work with are in San Francisco. I'd love to hear about that.

My cousin is fixing to move to Miami. I'd like to hear how his Spanish is coming along.

There are interesting people all around me going to interesting places and I'd like to hear their stories, and forget about all my caretaking duties and my 30 item To Do List [from hell] and the fact that I lost the cap to the car's gas tank yesterday and my kitchen is dirty, and dirty dishes seem to multiply no matter how often I run the dishwasher. REAL LIFE! Ack.

If you are a friend or family member and you are reading this, did you know you can go on Blogger and start a blog, for free, and write about whatever you like? You can post every day, or once a month, or just once and then not again. Posting photos is easy. There's a whole big world out there to blog about and blogging is EASY PEASY y'all.

I have no plans to ever get on an airplane again, please God, so I want to read about people I know in exotic places. Or even just in Florida.

So start typing.

 

Oh The Places I'd Go

I was thinking the other day about all the places I'd like to go if I had the money and the time. Not being able to afford a vacation can cause serious daydreaming, unfortunately.

First up of course would be Edisto Beach, for a week or so of just being lazy and doing nothing. If there was nothing available there I'd opt for Hilton Head, mainly because I've been there so many times I know where everything is, and there are some excellent restaurants.I prefer the quiet of Edisto, though.

After my last trip abroad, to get Michael in May 2007, I vowed I'd never travel internationally again, and I may not. However, I can fantasize.

The countries I've daydreamed about seeing are Italy, Ireland, and New Zealand.I've never been to those countries. The countries I've spent the most time in are Kazakhstan, Russia, England, and Germany.

Dad went to Italy in the early 50's.

He went back with Mom in the late 1980's, and one of Mom's favorite photos is of the two of them at an outdoor table in Venice, at St. Mark's Square. I don't have it scanned in, unfortunately.

Ireland will be a must-see destination when I get the money, too.I am part Irish on my mother's side of the family.I feel a pull towards that country every time I see a movie that was made there, starting years ago with the classic The Quiet Man.

I would love to visit New Zealand, since I've long been a fan of movies filmed there, like The Piano and the Lord of the Rings movies.

Wow, I'm starting to sense a pattern here. I see a movie and think wow, I must go there. I bet there's a name for that somewhere in the psychology books...

All this travel thinking got me to reminiscing about the one time I went to Europe, years ago.

In 1988 I went to Europe one summer on a monthlong "holiday" as our British cousins would say. I took two weeks of vacation and two weeks unpaid leave. I studied Drama in England for three weeks with a group from the University of Tennessee, where I was in grad school, and spent a week with my brother and his wife, who were living in Germany.

I took a brand new 35 mm camera with me, and made a ton of photos, some of which weren't too awful, but looking at the quality now, I am sort of amused. Photos now are SO much better than they were in 1988.

In Germany, my brother took his dog Ben everywhere. Germans are/were very dog friendly. Ben was very well behaved, too. Here they are in a riverbank in Wurzburg, I think.

This is a photo I am rather proud of, considering the weather, film, and my limited skills. It was taken from the castle in Edinburgh. Note in the foreground is a doggie graveyard, which impressed me. We spent a lot of time walking up and down the Royal Mile leading to the castle, shopping, but not a whole lot of time in the castle. I was with my friend Aurelia, and we went to Edinburgh for a long weekend, apart from the rest of the group. Everyone sort of scattered that weekend, which was fine. I loved Edinburgh, despite the fact it was July and it was cold and rainy. We bought jackets, sweatshirts and wool sweaters that trip, because all us Americans were not used to the 55 degree summer days there./ Below, me and Ree at Hampton Court [home of Henry VIII].

The two weeks the group was in London were a lot of fun. We were free to sightsee during the day and at night we went to plays.

I loved England, not just because I knew the language, either. All the English people I encountered were friendly and nice. The cultural differences were amusing, not scary. I had a strong sense of deja vu, which must have come from my my DNA, since many of my ancestors hailed from the British Isles. It was just a lovely country.

The only thing that was tricky was the weather. We quickly learned that we could start off in the morning for a day of sightseeing and it would be bright and sunny, then there would be a downpour, then it would be sunny again. We carried umbrellas everywhere.

We also saw a lot of wonderful plays. The first week, we were in Stratford, so we saw about 6 Shakespeare plays. In looking back over my collection of play programs years later I noticed Ralph Fiennes was in a production of King John I saw in Stratford. Little did I know he would be come famous years later as Voldemort.

I was about as thin as I've ever been in my life in 1988. I was a poor student and I walked everywhere and ate a lot of baked potatoes and canned soup. Well, in England I ate a lot of Chinese food. I quickly realized I wasn't fond of English food. I ordered a ploughman's lunch once at a pub and they brought me a piece of stale bread, a whole onion, and a hunk of cheese. Um, not tasty.

I also wasn't crazy about baked beans, which they eat for breakfast over there. Now I love baked beans, but when you're a bit hungover and they are staring up at you from a steam table, hmmm.... We stayed at the University of London in dorms and had to be up early if we wanted to eat breakfast there.

I've always love seeing plays, but England spoiled me. The theatre there is such a living, vital institution, and the acting is so wonderful. America just doesn't quite measure up.

Once you've seen a Shakespeare play in England, you just never enjoy American productions, not unless they have an exceptionally amazing cast or the play is on Broadway. I saw a local production of the Tempest later, in about 1994, and was horrified. I almost left, it was so awful.

The production of The Tempest I saw in England starred John Wood, a marvelous actor. I just looked him up in IMDB and realized he died about a month ago. What a shame. His Prospero was electrifying.

Lettice and Lovage was my favorite of all the plays I saw that summer. It starred Dame Maggie Smith and she was fantastic. I never laughed so hard in my life. My face and sides hurt from laughing. It's a shame I've never seen a movie version of the play.

Well, I better wrap this up and go make dinner. If I get the energy I may scan in some more photos later, but don't hold your breath...

Gardening, Cooking, Writing

There are three things I really enjoy in life [gardening, cooking, and writing], and I got to do them all today, which made it a good day, even though there was some sadness, too. That's just life, right? The bitter and the sweet.

Early this morning, I watered everything in the gardens and was delighted to note how well my flowering plants are doing in the front yard. After Michael planted my new little rose bushes for me I was afraid they wouldn't make it, but I fertilized them and I am still watering daily, and they are coming back. The yellow one even has some small blooms on it. I have some blossoms on my side garden tomato plants and that is thrilling to me. I hope I can harvest enough tomatoes to make some marinara sauce and freeze it this summer. The one yard thing I hate to do is pull weeds. I decided a few weeks ago I would pull a few weeds each day and not try to do them all at once in any one particular area. It workes better that way and it's easier on my back.

After Mother finished breakfast and Alesia got the kitchen cleaned up, I made my pound cake and put that in the oven, in three loaf pans, then I made Ina's curried chicken salad recipe. Now, I don't much like chicken salad, but that is GOOD. I used dried cranberries instead of raisins. Mother helped me a bit and said even she liked it, and she really doesn't care for curried stuff. The revelation to me was that the fat bone-in skin-on chicken breasts I got at Publix turned out so delicious. All I did was rub them with olive oil, salt and pepper, and bake them on 350 for about 40 minutes. They were moist and delicious. I had to have a couple of bites that didn't make it into the salad, I have to admit. So, so good.

When it's so easy to make something so tasty, why don't more people cook?! I will never understand that.

Two of the three pound cake loaves came out really well. The third one, the bottom got a tiny bit too done, so I saved that for us to eat. I am taking the good loaves to church tomorrow afternoon for the High Tea.

I spent part of the afternoon composing the cover blurb for my new book, The Warrior's Box. That was an interesting exercise. Trying to condense the story into a few sentences wasn't easy. I enjoy even mundane writing tasks like that, though. It's like solving a puzzle.

Not everything today was pleasant, unfortunately.

I had to turn down a job interview today, for a website writer. I didn't realize when I sent off a resume what sort of website it really was - it's for an infertility clinic. I looked through the entire website after I was sent an email today and I thought, this is awful. Nowhere on the site was adoption mentioned as an option for infertile couples. Lots of photos of parents with cute babies. No photos of heartbroken people unable to conceive and scared to adopt. I've never dealt with infertility, but I know a lot of couples who have gone through that heartbreak, including my own brother and his wife. Urging people to pour thousands and thousands of dollars into treatments that have only 5-10% chance of success makes me angry. There are SO MANY babies and toddlers in foster homes and orphanages around the world who need parents. All the infertile couples I know who turned to adoption were happy with their outcomes. A child is a child, and every child needs love and care, and when you're looking into the eyes of your child, biology just really does not matter, even if that child has brown eyes and you have blue ones.

I am trying to help my friend Alla at Adoption Ark find an adoptive family for a 6 year old boy in Bulgaria who is missing both hands, a congenital limb difference. Most people won't even consider the boy, but let me tell you something - with decent prosthetics and some physical therapy I am sure he can lead a totally normal, productive life. Doesn't he deserve a loving mama and daddy?

As most of you know that read this blog, even casually, my daughter Alesia was adopted from Khabarovsk, Russia, in 2004. One of my fellow single moms in my Yahoo group for Russian adoptive moms shared a link about her recent visit back to Russia with her now teenaged daughter, to find the child's birthplace. I read the entire account of the visit, In Search of Krivuha, and wanted to cry. I could envision making a similar journey with Alesia one day. The little village looks a lot like the village Alesia is from, and it even resembles the poorer section of Khabarovsk. The houses look to be 100 years old, and there are huge potholes and garbage everywhere. This is not Moscow or St. Petersburg. Krivuha bears a much closer resemblance to the real Russia, the non-tourist places. The poverty is impossible to imagine if you haven't been there.

There's also great beauty though. Russia is a land of harsh contrasts.

This is Alesia the day I took her out of the orphanage, on the banks of the Amur River.

Italy 1951

During his army leaves my dad traveled a lot around Italy, and here's photographic proof. Somewhere in the garage, in an old trunk, are handwritten letters to his mother, but I recall reading them some years ago and they weren't too enlightening. They said things like "Italy was hot. We ate a lot of spaghetti." A man of few words.

So, some of these are a mystery to me, but a few are obvious. Even I, who have never been to Italy, recognized the Roman Colosseum.

This one is a mystery but I think it might be Florence...?

The shot below is a statue of David but it's in Florence. I debated about whether or not to publish it here, but it looks like his, uh, package, is covered up somewhat, so I said to heck with it. It looks like poor David has some sort of fungi or mold growing there though...

 

I like the shot above, because it's the Riviera, [and yes, I know it's France, but whatever] a place I love to look at in photos, but if I'm going to the beach to relax, that won't be the place. The wide sandy beaches of Georgia and South Carolina suit me just fine.

I would love for someone to tell me where the shot below was taken. Took me a while to figure out the pointy thing is called an obelisk, but after looking at 500 photos of them on Google images and not finding this one I said stick a fork in me, I'm done. Hopefully somebody who knows Italy can enlighten me about this place.

I was very happy after looking at relatively few images on the web to find out that the shot below was made at the Piazza Navona in Rome. That link gives you a better shot than the one below and it's fun reading.

[above, shots of Dad during his travels] Below is a shot of my uncle Lewis Thompson, Dad's older brother, who was a wonderful artist and taught at Hollins College in Virginia for more than 35 years. I wish he was still alive because he lived in Italy several times over the years, on sabbatical, and knew it well.

A few years later, Dad met Mama and the rest is history...

More Europe Photos

I thought I'd post some more of my dad's photos from Europe, circa 1952. Some of them the quality isn't so hot, but I fear the slides may have deteriorated in the fifty odd years since they were taken.You mainly see it in the sky, black blotches.

I have no idea where this is, but my guess is probably Italy. Maybe Rome?

The shot below looks like Venice.

Not sure where this is...